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Phantom

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Fading Away
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since 03-14-2001
Posts 4302
Lynchburg, Virginia


0 posted 03-15-2001 11:45 AM       View Profile for Fading Away   Email Fading Away   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Fading Away

It's the fearless haze,
Finding its way into my mind,
Seeping through my conscious,
Laying its ground,
Creating my craze...

The blanket which covers all reason,
In these moments of dark silence
Suffocates my soul...
I see life through a tiny hole,
Each day from the same season.
My phantom hovering in my head
Wants me alone.
It's jealous of my real strength.
It weaves these threads so tight
That I see nothing,
except where I've bled.

One unpossessed moment in the night,
A sliver of love seeps through,
And cuts into my sore heart.
It carves with the knife,
What I've been needing for my fight...
This weapon of choice
Lays heavy in my hands
I refuse to succumb
To the phantom's demands.
It is the rebirth of my "own" self,
My own voice.

Just a little something I wrote in a quick period of time. Hope you liked it.

--Marie
© Copyright 2001 Jennifer Floyd - All Rights Reserved
Linc
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Posts 705
The Backstreet Boy


1 posted 03-15-2001 12:44 PM       View Profile for Linc   Email Linc   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Linc

Hey Fading Away,

This piece was very good I liked it alot from your 2 poems I am expecting good things from you so until your next poem

-- Linc

"Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment."
Allan Riverwood
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since 01-04-2001
Posts 4212
Winnipeg


2 posted 03-15-2001 09:10 PM       View Profile for Allan Riverwood   Email Allan Riverwood   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Allan Riverwood

This was wonderful. Impulse poetry tends to turn out very emotionally.
The opening stanza was excellent, it led me right into the rest of the poem in the correct mood.
Great job.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort

Dopey Dope
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since 08-30-2000
Posts 15536
San Juan, Puerto Rico


3 posted 03-15-2001 09:38 PM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

I liked it. Thought it was great and I think you are a great addition to our family of friends.
hope to see you post more and reply just as much or even more!


I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily
Acies
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since 06-07-2000
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Twilight Zone


4 posted 03-19-2001 06:08 PM       View Profile for Acies   Email Acies   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Acies

WOW!!!
I'm very very impressed
~*applauds*~

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

anonymousfemale
Member Ascendant
since 02-02-2000
Posts 6304
Limbo


5 posted 12-11-2001 09:53 AM       View Profile for anonymousfemale   Email anonymousfemale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for anonymousfemale

Wowsers, marie. Impulse ROCKS!!  
There is so much emotion in this it makes you want to jump around and scream ROAR at the top of your lungs.  

"The blanket which covers all reason,
In these moments of dark silence
Suffocates my soul...
I see life through a tiny hole,
Each day from the same season."

Those lines had the biggest effect on me. That blanket is a permanent part of all our lives. *sigh*

Thanks for the read.  

~AF~

"Always keep focus on your dreams because most often than not that's all you'll have." - Javier

 
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