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Teen Poetry #4
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Barelybreathing
Junior Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 46


0 posted 2001-03-13 02:39 AM



Bitter memories
suppressed so long
Clouded thoughts
ache the head
Unsheltered road
that's all I have
Pitiful miseries
are all I get
Demons cling
to my tortured soul
Raging mad they
tear me apart
Uncultured words
fill my mouth
Blasphemy and curses
echoes the earth
Broken now
I fall to the ground
Limp and deflated
A washed-out bum.


'The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own.'
~Montaigne~


© Copyright 2001 Barelybreathing - All Rights Reserved
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
1 posted 2001-03-13 07:15 AM


Wow ... powerful writing Barelybreathing. Very visual and hits with an impact, well done!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Allan Riverwood
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Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
2 posted 2001-03-13 09:17 AM


Nice. It had an interesting style to it, and a content that made me shudder. Great job.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort


Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
3 posted 2001-03-13 05:57 PM


Great job here.
I liked it very much!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Acies
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Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
4 posted 2001-03-16 05:39 PM


Hope things are better for ya
your poem kinda gets me concerned
thanks for the read

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
5 posted 2001-03-16 06:54 PM


I like this a lot.. but it kind of scares me too. I hope things get better for you.

--Marie

I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am.

Linc
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Senior Member
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552
The Backstreet Boy
6 posted 2001-03-16 10:47 PM


WOW

this is a great poem very poweful and its going straight to my library. Keep up the good work

-- Linc

"Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment."

Barelybreathing
Junior Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 46

7 posted 2001-03-16 11:46 PM


Thanks all for your replies..
sam


'The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own.'
~Montaigne~


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