The Cat and Her Stolen Tongue

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Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

0 posted 2001-03-12 10:24 PM

It's become so cold
on my side of town
and when I need a lift
there's no one around
What I want and need
are pointless to voice
they fall from my lips like leaves
in the bitter chill of fall
and they lay dead and empty
when they find the ground

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

1 posted 2001-03-12 10:40 PM

Pretty good... not exactly your best.
I think it would have been better with some sort of a format to it.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort

Elvenblood
Member

since 2001-02-17

Posts 409
Maine, USA

2 posted 2001-03-12 10:41 PM

Awww..., that's so sad... omg, i'm speechless, please be happy...wow! It's wonderful, I'm glad to reply to it, and add it to my library!

"Some men see things as they are and say why.
I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

3 posted 2001-03-12 11:26 PM

Ewww....I hate formats. I'm all freestyle. It may be the downfall of my work, but it's what I like. Thanks though..both of you.

and in the end
we still pretend
the time we spend
not knowing when
we're finally free
and you could be
-NIN "The Wretched"

Angel of Darkness

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2001-03-13 07:01 PM

NO!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!
This was great!
I really liked this but what does the title have to do with it?
I thought this was great!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

5 posted 2001-03-17 04:21 PM

I too thought this was good
kinda felt like you cut it short though
i'd like to see your free verse longer
thanks for the read
keep sharing

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

6 posted 2001-03-17 04:36 PM

Yeah, this is kind of short. But I liked it just the same, just try to expand on it a little more. GOod job, though.

--Marie

I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am.

fozzyozzy
Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

7 posted 2001-03-18 12:37 PM

yay! Another champion for freeverse. I totally dig the poem.

"The woods are lovely, dark, and deep
But I have promises to keep
And miles to go before I sleep
And miles to go before I sleep"
-Robert Frost

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