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Teen Poetry #4
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Marshalzu
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since 2001-02-15
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0 posted 2001-03-11 04:50 PM



Letter of Jealousy.

I'm swallowed by these feelings
I'm feeling so consumed
all these things leave me reeling
and I consider the assumed
I question every momement
examine every word
I'm feeling such a torment
I wonder what I heard
I'm jealous of your absense
and it leaves me full of hate
and in this present tense
I just sit and contemplate
it seems that i'm a loser
and i've lost out in ths game
i'm a serial abuser
but I cannot bare the fame.

Friendship may end in love but love in friendship never.

© Copyright 2001 Andrew Sewell - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
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San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2001-03-11 10:07 PM


Serial abuser.........wow that line was awesome. I liked it tons. Wonderful job here.


I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Allan Riverwood
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since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
2 posted 2001-03-12 01:57 AM


Yes, that one got me as well. I hate to be unoriginal in a reply though...
I'd like to say the flow of these letters was nice. The fact that they are "letters" are interesting... this aspect of the poem makes it seem more personal, like something between two people.
Very excellent job. I await more letters.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort


Acies
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Member Rara Avis
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Twilight Zone
3 posted 2001-03-14 08:58 PM


This is probably one of your best poems that I've read. You have shown your sentiments in a really good way. Keep sharing

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

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