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Teen Poetry #4
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Raven Skye
Member
since 2001-03-03
Posts 112
.In a House.

0 posted 2001-03-09 03:28 PM


Especially to Me

I wish upon a star
That maybe you could see
How much you really mean
Especially to me.

It wasn't long ago
When I thought you were the one
I don't think you remember
But we sure had lots of fun.

And now we've grown apart
Thrown away the lock & key
I'll guess you'll never know
Maybe it isn't meant to be.

But if you change your mind
I'll be here to stay &
If you look into your heart
I'm never too far away.

So I'll wish upon that star
And maybe you will see
How special you really are
Especially to me.

---ehh hey guys, not my best work, i know...feedback good/bad are both
accepted...thanks






*×´¨`·.×*Raven Skye*×´¨`·.×*
"Can't explain the way that I feel. You are the love I never found." -Cold

© Copyright 2001 Raven Skye - All Rights Reserved
Jenn Cirrincione
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107
Fl
1 posted 2001-03-09 04:05 PM


This was really sweet. I understand that feeling. Just kind of empty without that person. Good luck.

jenn


"I'm a big, big, girl, in a big, big world, it's not a big, big thing if you leave me, but I do feel, that I will miss you much..." Emilia



Allan Riverwood
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
2 posted 2001-03-09 05:12 PM


Well it's not your best work, it's a bit different.
Hope you didn't squeeze it out or anything.
Either way, it's alright. And it's definitely as good as it is going to get, so I can't offer much feedback.
~Allan


If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort


Dopey Dope
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Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
3 posted 2001-03-09 06:10 PM


I thought it was ok, not as good as your others, but still a nice read.
Hope to see more.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
4 posted 2001-03-10 12:25 PM


Raven, nicely written with a pretty good flow to it.
As I haven't really read much of your work, I can't really compare it to the others. Well done all the same.

~AF~

"To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems!"
Homer Simpson

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
5 posted 2001-03-11 09:19 PM


This was written in simple form, but I love what it says. Probably one of my best reads today so far. Thanks for the share

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Angel Bee
Member
since 2001-01-30
Posts 176
Virginia
6 posted 2001-03-11 09:38 PM


I really liked this poem. Keep writing. )
always, *~~angel bee~~*

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