navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #4 » Walking between Shadows
Teen Poetry #4
Post A Reply Post New Topic Walking between Shadows Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Angel in Flight
Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381


0 posted 2001-02-25 08:48 PM


I used to walk between shadows.
Afraid I’d see to far.
Darkness started to me my friend,
But my heart it did mar.

I once had ran upon the nails.
Loving all of the pain!!
Searching for a rapid relief.
Out of my dark filled day.

I had cut through the forest trees .
I made my own flesh bleed.
My blood had suffocated me ...
until I could not breath

The darkness was my enemy.
Cloaked in red, black, and white
devouring my very soul,
and leading me to night.

The dust blew over my body,
And the nails continued the pain.
No longer was I remembered.
I was left bleeding.........
gasping for air......
dying ........... in the rain.


The law of harvest is to reap more than you sow.Sow a habit and you reap a character.Sow a character and you reap a destiny

© Copyright 2001 Amanda - All Rights Reserved
Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
1 posted 2001-02-25 08:53 PM


Amanda, this was an amazing poem. The power of the sadness was there. your poetry has become very powerful. its nice that way.
Regina

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
2 posted 2001-02-26 02:59 AM


Wow Amanda, this is amazing.
So much emotion..its just incredible. Keep on writing like this. Like Regina said, it has become very powerful.

~AF~

"Love makes us poets and the approach of death should make us philosophers."
~ George Santayana

Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
3 posted 2001-02-26 07:42 PM


Amanda -- you seem to grow more and more with your poetry everyday
you have turned out to be an amazing poet
your use of metaphors is also outstanding
keep it up

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

DancinQueen
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
4 posted 2001-02-26 09:16 PM


awesome poem~~ i just got this mental picture of nails and blood and bleck ...i didnt mean to make that sound bad!! i was just bein weird..but great poem. all yours hold so much depth and beauty, keep it up

*dq


¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
5 posted 2001-02-28 02:49 PM


I thought the poem was pretty dark, but I liked it.
Very nice read, the ending was exceptional!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #4 » Walking between Shadows

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary