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Teen Poetry #4
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No Way Out
| Teen Poetry #4 |
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No Way Out |
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MysticalAngel7 Junior Member
since 2001-02-24
Posts 20 |
My scrambled thoughts The miles of stress The mounds of frustration Damn it, I try my best Almost never perfect Not good enough Zero to a million tries Yet still no love Anger to heaven Going straight to hell Where's the point My life's for sale There's no reasons Still no rights There's no peace In me tonight Everythings wrong Decisions... A mistake No more love Full of hate Where's the end Can I draw the line Can I stop the pain No, I'm not fine There's no help There's "no way out" My body hurts My emotions shout This is the end I've drawn the line There's still pain I'm still not fine |
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| © Copyright 2001 Carissa Clark - All Rights Reserved | |||
Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Very well written. The size of each line improved the message within. You did a great job. I like the last line especially. "I'm still not fine." Seems like you fight for mediocrity... well mediocrity can be a gift.  Welcome to Passions. -Allan The unintelligent are merely tools for the intelligent. That would make my house a veritable toolshed. ~~Allan Riverwood |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Welcome to Passions I also liked the length of your lines, the poem flowed very well. Great first post, I hope you post more and stay in the forum for a while "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.therainforestsite.com |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Welcome to passions!!!! Let me tell you that I liked the scheme and format of it. I thought it was pretty well written. Nicely done here. I hope to see you write more. Oh, and please be fine.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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MysticalAngel7 Junior Member
since 2001-02-24
Posts 20 |
Thank you for all your comments. I have to say that I am fine though. Everyone has thier good and bad days. -and to Dopey_Dope- I looked for some of your poetry and didn't find any. I would like to read your writings... If you have any suggestions... Just tell me where I can find them. -Thanks guys...Carissa Neither the angels in heaven above,Nor the demons down under the sea,can ever dissever my soul from the soul, of the beautiful Annabel Lee -E.A.Poe |
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Elvenblood Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409Maine, USA |
I think this is fantastic. A wonderful descriptin of emotion. Welcome, and keep writing. "Some men see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK |
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Marshalzu 
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681Lurking |
This is great, I really loved it... it's was very easy to empathise and I felt I could almost hear you... Can't wait to see some more of your work. Marshal Zu. |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Welcome to Passions Mystical Angel! We are very happy you have decided to join our community of poetry friendship and we look forward to having you share your efforts with us. This is a very emotion-filled first post. You've expressed yourself well in this piece ... I hope to read more of your poetry and your responses to our wonderful family of poets! (check your e-mail for a special message) Best wishes, /Kit |
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
Heyaz. I really liked this, it sounds like something I might write. Great job, and I can't wait to see more!  ~Carly "Nature is not only all that is visible to the eye--it also includes the inner pictures of the soul." ~Edvard Munch |
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DancinQueen
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
great first post~ i really liked it. Sums me up pretty well You remind me of one of my friends, the style of your writing atleast. great job i cant wait to read more*dq ¤Sometimes the hardest thing to get over, is something you never really had¤ |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!! I'm glad to see that you've decided to join us. Hope you enjoy you stay like evryone else has We look forward to reading more of your work, so keep posting  So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S. |
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MysticalAngel7 Junior Member
since 2001-02-24
Posts 20 |
Thanks again for your replies. I seem to like this poem most out of my work. I can do better but it does come across to me that I explained how I felt really well. I am fine... I just seem to have a few bad days here and there and I write to relieve the stress of being a teenager. It's something most people go through in life... Expecially when decisions come around such as college... majors... when your getting closer to having to begin planning your life and future. And having jerks for boyfriends don't help at the time either!!lol! But anyways... Thank you. -Always Carissa Neither the angels in heaven above,Nor the demons down under the sea,can ever dissever my soul from the soul, of the beautiful Annabel Lee -E.A.Poe |
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