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Elvenblood
Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409
Maine, USA

0 posted 2001-02-24 09:55 AM


I don't have a title for this work, so I just put in a good subject. My gf Kate and I broke up after 4 months because we lived too far apart to see each other very often. We thought it would be better this way, but now I know we were wrong.

We met the night
despite the odds
Talked for hours
about the gods
I had to go
at the hour’s prods

We met another night
at the fair
At the end of the night
my hand in your hair
We knew it was love
of a kind rare

We had some fun
whenever we could
It wasn’t often
understood
We pushed on for months
stress withstood.

Come January
it had been long
I missed you much
6 weeks are gone
My mind went wacky
I thought I was strong

The phone rang
I knew what you thought
We talked for hours
both distraught
I would have said I love you
but the words caught

I moved on with my life
weeks It’s been
I thought I could live
but my heart did win
Now I need you back
to love and give up is a sin

But I cannot be happy
I will lose
We’d still have no time
hope is a ruse
Now is a curse
now is the blues

I can’t go on
as a separate two
Let’s try again
to start anew
I cannot live
without you


"Some men see things as they are and say why.
I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK

© Copyright 2001 Bryan W. Holmes - All Rights Reserved
anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
1 posted 2001-02-24 10:15 AM


Aww this is so sad. I know exactly how you feel. Unfortunately alot our descisions in areas like this are made on impulse and we frequently regret them.
Yep here come the memories.

Great work Elvenblood.

~AF~


Your

"Love makes us poets and the approach of death should make us philosophers."
~ George Santayana

Allan Riverwood
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Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
2 posted 2001-02-24 10:21 AM


Oh my... I had no idea.
Well best of luck with the situation, Bryan. If you ever need to talk, then you know where I can be reached.
I'll see you later. Keep your head high.
And great poem. The rhyme scheme was original, and looked like it would have been tough to pull off.
Well done.
-Allan

The unintelligent are merely tools for the intelligent. That would make my house a veritable toolshed. ~~Allan Riverwood

Acies
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Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
3 posted 2001-02-24 02:54 PM


I do believe that yo should send her this poem
specially, now that things just happened
let her know what you really feel
you have nothing to lose and everything to gain

So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Tamma
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Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 794
In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV
4 posted 2001-02-24 09:11 PM


This was an awsome description of what I was feeing a year ago today...But me and my sailor boy went our separate ways...oh yea...you don't know me...you can ask anyone here, I can be sort of a nutcase, and I don't usually reply to a poem unless it captures me...so this is my belated welcome to PiP!!!

www.angelfire.com/wv2/poetrycorner
I'm just a girl looking at a guy asking him to love me


Starr
Member
since 2001-02-08
Posts 100

5 posted 2001-02-24 09:29 PM


Oh how sad !! I think that this was really lovely... Written well.. you expressed yourself well... Show her this and thing might change.. Tell her those words and you probably see a difference... Keep writing... It's (for me) the best way to express your self.

Every action of our lives touches some chord that will vibrate in eternity.

Angel in Flight
Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381

6 posted 2001-02-24 09:35 PM


This is a .. sorry I am still speechless. Your work is so powerful and I love all of them up to date. I truly say this with all of my heart, all of it; May the two of you become friends again and hopefully very soon. I know the pain of losing a dear friend and wondering and hoping you will get that friend back, and for your sake as well as the other persons I wish that the both of you become friends once more. Love always ~Amanda

The law of harvest is to reap more than you sow.Sow a habit and you reap a character.Sow a character and you reap a destiny

Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
7 posted 2001-02-24 09:39 PM


this poem made me cry. It was so heart wrenching, if u ever need to talk...email me or something....thats how i feel about brad and our relationship. the emotion in your poem was so well expressed. Its going in my libary. as someone send this to her.
Regina

Elvenblood
Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409
Maine, USA
8 posted 2001-02-24 10:00 PM


Aww, thank you so much! I posted a reply, and said poetry to me is about expression. I realy need to talk to her, but she's on vacation right now. Anyway, it's going to be hell. We still won't se each other. I'm gonna lose, life sucks then you die though right? so why not be as happy as you can. Then you truly win.

"Some men see things as they are and say why.
I dream things that never were and say why not." ~RFK

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
9 posted 2001-02-25 12:30 PM


Woah this was truly a sad one. Sounds like a no winner eh?.....geesh.
Well lemme tell you...life doesn't always suck and then you die. C'mon let's be a bit more positive here. You had the right idea with just trying to be happy......but that's only a cover up.....let's face it....it's gonna be hell for a while, but you and I know that you'll eventually get over it and tread along the designated path that you're supposed to go to. Soon enough you'll find something waiting at the end.....hopefully happiness eh?
Good luck pal!
Great poem, hit the spot....nice one.



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
10 posted 2001-02-25 11:52 AM


Dopey wrote such a great reply. can you just read his over again for my reply? Thanks. And excellent job on the poem

"Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker
http://www.therainforestsite.com  

jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
11 posted 2001-02-25 02:08 PM


damn it all... you people steal all the good stuff to say! But, i did enjoy the rhyme in this it was very original

JR


When life dims to a perish, my life will become a quote in itself...

Suga_Baby
Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380
Maine, USA
12 posted 2001-03-09 11:54 PM


This is so romantic!! I wish a guy would write something like this for ME! *L* haha lucky girl to have such a deep, thoughful poet in pursuit of her with the power of such words...
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