navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #4 » Musings of Silence
Teen Poetry #4
Post A Reply Post New Topic Musings of Silence Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI

0 posted 2001-02-19 03:42 PM


Hey peeps. It's been a while since I posted, so here's some bitter candy for your surely hungry little eyes.........


Through Rose-Colored Glasses

D i s a s t e r
Is imminent, but continue your ways.
Your placid world lives no wasted days.
Sweet, haunting words, hide from your ears.
Force eyes to ignore your own baby's tears.

I n d o l e n c e
Is lovely, more attractive than I.
Fill your lungs with content as I whimper and sigh.

____________________________________________________

Auntie Laurie

Another conversation carried
In a whispered hush.
Ignorance screaming, never buried
By a daughter's blush.

Emptiness holds eyeliner hostage.
(Lacerated joy)
Mutalated bodies are haunting--
Just another toy.

____________________________________________________

Narcolepsy

Drop of blood is slowly slipping,
Dripping down the scarlet tongue.
Ocean eyes are open, haunting
Flaunting lyrics never sung.

Mind, still waking, faster, thinking
Shrinking as the heart must slow.
Mother's screams heard through her weeping;
Sleeping son must always know.



© Copyright 2001 Carly Anne Van Dort - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2001-02-19 09:17 PM


I liked these.....I thought that out of the 3 the 1st one was the best. nIcely done here carly.
Hope to see more!



I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

IsGona
Senior Member
since 2000-07-14
Posts 723

2 posted 2001-02-19 09:18 PM


Wow... it's been a looooong day and my brain is fried, but these poems are amazing as usual. I like the last one the best... I think... I will have to read these again in the morning. Wonderful job as always. you are quite the poetess

<-this guy cracks me up for some reason

~Jason


To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is
research

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

Maitay
Member
since 1999-07-16
Posts 158
Sisters,OR,USA
3 posted 2001-02-20 12:00 PM


I've been gone for a while and never read your poems till now, those are amazing peices. I cant wait to read more...

~The price of finding love is to eventually lose it. When I wish on a falling star, I wish not for material goods but to show kindness to others and be content with what the world may offer me~

~Maitay Mirabel Litton~


Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
4 posted 2001-02-20 09:45 AM


Carly
You are simply amazing
Your writing is astounding
BRAVO!!!


So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.


[This message has been edited by acire (edited 02-20-2001).]

jeremydraul
Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118
State of Despair
5 posted 2001-02-20 01:40 PM


WOW, those were great, I liked the last one the best and the part:
"Drop of blood is slowly slipping,
Dripping down the scarlet tongue.
Ocean eyes are open, haunting
Flaunting lyrics never sung."
very very kind of you to post 3!

ps- i love your critic message

JR


When life dims to a perish, my life will become a quote in itself...

Allan Riverwood
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
6 posted 2001-02-20 06:14 PM


Carly!
Suffice it to say that you RULE, girl. I had seen the second one earlier, you showed it to me. I think the same of it as I did before.
The first one was... ahh... okay. But it was outshone by the other two, in my opinion.
The ~LAST~ one was ~PACKED~ with powerful verbs. This made the imagery all that much more impressive, the feelings seem all that much more real.
The last one is my favourite for this reason.
They are all good, you little poetess you! Keep sharing, girl! *hugs*
Talk to you later.
-Allan


The unintelligent are merely tools for the intelligent. That would make my house a veritable toolshed. ~~Allan Riverwood

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #4 » Musings of Silence

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary