»
Archives
»
Teen Poetry #4
»
Bergundy
| Teen Poetry #4 |
|
Bergundy |
|
|
Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
She's too far away will this dream end today I can't touch her she's too far away but she's with me all the time i can't help but love her she's too far away I want her here but i still can't get rid of this fear sooner or later she'll find another guy I want her here She's on my mind all the time Everytime I think of her I swear I feel high I want her here Don't like to edit messages but oh well, I'd just like to add in here that uh she's on the other side of the country...distance in this one really isn't symbolic. Unfortunatly. Yeah ok I know, not the best by any standards, not even mine. I don't seem to convey "positive" emotions very well..anyways I was up for 62 hours before I wrote this and I haven't revised it yet...enjoy? >¶Øʆ< [This message has been edited by Poet on Acid (edited 02-05-2001).] |
||
| © Copyright 2001 Tony Ryan Johnson - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
It was good, your right not your best. but still worthy of an appaulse and a praise. Regina when i wish for you, i wish that could we lie side by side hearts entwined. |
||
Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Not your best, but nonetheless A great read!!!  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
||
|
Tamma
since 2000-01-17
Posts 794In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV |
I've felt this before..but I was engaged to the guy...hehe. I don't think either of us expected it to end the way it did, tho. I did find another guy, and yea, that "other" guy would be Justin...That probably didn't make you feel too much better...Awsome poem, by the way  www.angelfire.com/wv2/poetrycorner I'm just a girl looking at a guy asking him to love me |
||
|
Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
I believe that what you are conveying here is the beauty of the poem, even if you don't like the format or structure of it. And the message is lovely and quite sorrowful. Believe me, I've felt the same way. Good job, POA. Nice to have you back. -Allan We used to hate people, now we just make fun of them. It's more effective that way. --KMFDM |
||
|
Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
no problem...i htought it was a really good read..thanks for sharing I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
||
|
Angel in Flight Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 381 |
Personally i thought this was a very touching poem and it is wonderful to see you back again. Great read |
||
|
Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
I liked this one, it's a good poem. The way you express how you feel is great, nice job. "Disagreements stimulate thought, thought stimulates action, and action stimulates life." --Lakewalker http://www.thehungersite.com |
||
|
jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
A little off subject to what you usually write about but it still was filled with great words of passion and love. Im glad yo see you posting again! Jeremy "I believe that man will not merely endure: he will prevail. -William Faulkner (Noble Prize Speech.) |
||
|
anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Poet, a good piece but an even greater effort for even typing it after being awake for 62 hours!  Good to see you are back and posting again. ~AF~ "Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." Buddha |
||
|
Poet on Acid Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 325Florida, USA |
Thanx everyone for your replies. I'm glad my work is at least being read. And AF, as for the being up 62 hours, an equal number of cups of coffee can do wonders. >¶Øʆ< |
||
|
orange()alligator Junior Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 21 |
poet, hey guess who bergundy is?? lol me! well i got lucky enough to get a sweet enough guy who would write me a poem that good so i decided to return the favor. i was gonna put this one my own page, but i don't think it's that good. the feeling is real though that is what counts. love you forever poet although although he's not here he'll always be in the heart deep inside me and he'll always be in the thoughts that I think everyday though I have not seen his smile or his eyes I’ll always have his words scattered across my mind I’ll always have the heart which he so recklessly gave I’ll always have the soul that he shares with me everyday I’ll always have his love that I’ll carry with me through life to keep; to save the heart that I would never hurt intentionally or strike the heart of tony whose words have become my life |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
