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Open Poetry #12
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Cerenity
Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637
Escondido-California

0 posted 2001-03-09 02:28 PM



Winter Fades Into Spring


Winter’s coat on mountains beams
Tipped with livid ashen scheme
Death of wintry solstice vowing
Vernal seasons theme arousing

Fleshy leaves and pretty blossoms
Embark on own wondrous rhythm
Circular motion; flawless chime
Announces the arrival of springtime

God’s earthly creatures arrive anew
Give pure testimony unto
Prospects promised of fresh season
Assuring springtime’s trusty beacon

The mind affords rebirth as well
Chance to change the human will
All things can begin fresh new start
Why not share some of your heart

With creation of season due
Comes magnificent colored hues
Giving triumph over all
Sequenced seasons that befall

Saying goodbye to winter's obscurity
Shedding veil of earthen blight
Springtime brings tranquillity
Blessing earth with pure delight


By, Cerenity




"God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist.
We have to be reminded that He exist!"

(Writer Unknown)






[This message has been edited by Cerenity (edited 03-09-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Ellen Ware - All Rights Reserved
VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
1 posted 2001-03-09 02:57 PM


This is a beautiful piece, truly beautiful. It does have some syllable count problems, small ones, and I'm wonder if you meant 'veil' instead of 'vial' near the end there. If you are curious about the syl. count thoughts, email me with your poem in the body and I'll be more specfic.
Cerenity
Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637
Escondido-California
2 posted 2001-03-10 10:47 AM


Hi VAS,

Thank you so much for the advice and your kind reply,

Love, Cerenity

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