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Open Poetry #12
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Black
| Open Poetry #12 |
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Black |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298
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Black the carpet is tweed and six out of nine pairs of shoes in the room are black no make that seven if you include mine they haven’t called my name yet a white lab coat wearing white shoes draws blood to see what ills they will find should my silence speak and give them a clue that the vials will show nothing my heart won’t heal until the black gives my baby back I want to snatch him back start him up all over again give him brand new smiles a nice shiny lease on life I want to fill his heart with soft warm caring that washes away twenty five years of scars I want to stand up and scream for the black to give my baby back tripping over cracks seen but not realized I clutch the band-aid tight my arm hurts but not enough to make me forget my ache I side step the gum and trash un-see the bars sign my name to the visiting list and sit and pray with heavy heart for the black to give my baby back they haven’t called my name yet... [This message has been edited by jellybeans (edited 03-06-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 jellybeans - All Rights Reserved | |||
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
I don't know what to say other than this was very good. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
It took a net to catch this butterfly but when I did it ransomed it self with a bagful of luscious jellybeans. Sy |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
should my silence speak and give them a clue that the vials will show nothing my heart won’t heal until the black gives my baby back I want to snatch him back start him up all over again give him brand new smiles a nice shiny lease on life I want to fill his heart with soft warm caring that washes away twenty five years of scars I want to stand up and scream for the black to give my baby back ================== most impressive imagery here jb and the small additions of rhyme gave it a very cool meter and flow ... the expression of the ache and emotions is intense ... felt this one for sure. sending more hugs for ya me Some find subtlety in strangers some find subtlety alone Your eyes,you see everything my eyes,I see its all together now and I know. ~candlebox~ |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
thanks guys...this has been a rough day, and so i deal with it the only way i know and that is to write...sigh |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
This breaks my heart... and no less so because it's written so well from your pen of tears. If I could braid sunshine and pull it down into your life, I would, dear friend... Until then, I'll just hurt with you and hope the writing helps. {{{{{{HUGS}}}}}} |
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