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Open Poetry #12
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This New Tune
| Open Poetry #12 |
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This New Tune |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
 like this new song you’ve introduced to me, your devotion continuously plays in my mind... each day the sun rises above those trees... right outside of my window, I awake to the sound of your love singing in my ear. the rhyme flows effortlessly...the melody steadily moves my heart. this tune lingers...the lyrics serve as a reminder; I won’t need a copy of the tape... I’ll remember how it goes from the first time you sang it. and, as the years pass by, it will remain, but accompanied by a new emotion... the passion won’t fade...the ecstasy will survive, but, now the harmony of certainty will enhance... the assurance of awaking to the sight of your face, the promise we made regarding the weathering of storms will stand through the ordeals of every day. when I am not pleased with these words, you will be there to offer your faithful suggestion... and, I will see to it that this song plays as long as we both lie in one another’s arms. -kh 02/01 do I believe we'd be better off apart? can I see my world without you in it? baby, not for a single minute... |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
This is a romantic beauty! Great write!! I love the positive romantic theme and the intimacy on all different levels....very wise and fulfilling poem!! The poet is like a cocoon; in him the caterpillar of the past finds rest, and from him the butterfly of the future emerges. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
the passion won’t fade...the ecstasy will survive, but, now the harmony of certainty will enhance... the assurance of awaking to the sight of your face, the promise we made regarding the weathering of storms will stand through the ordeals of every day. ==================== wonderful expressions of devotion and emotions I liked the tie in to music and nature well done once again SP gorgeous pic too another well inspired write you've become most accomplished in free verse and imagery .. (did ya give up on rhyme?) LOL great write jm It's amazing how you make your face just like a wall how you take your heart and turn it off how I turn my head and lose it all MB20 |
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Celeste Senior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 597 |
Beautiful Snowpants! You've captured magic!  "One out of four people in this country is mentally imbalanced. Think of your three closest friends - and if they seem okay, then you're the one." |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Most Wonderful! |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
ethome: why thank you so very much! I am glad you enjoyed this!!  JM: wow...thank you, m'friend, for your wonderful reply! and, no, I haven't totally given up on rhyme...shhh...don't tell the teach...LOL...it's just been hard to write lately, and this was a stretch for me!  So, I was happy with whatever I got out on paper, but, I was actually thinking about the same thing today...so, we'll see! but thank you for your kind support as always!!  dreamkeeper: well thank you! magic, huh? you are too kind! I am glad you liked this!! Sunshine: thank you so much! glad you enjoyed! sp  do I believe we'd be better off apart? can I see my world without you in it? baby, not for a single minute... |
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Tennessee Angel Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661Tennessee |
Good stuff, Snowpants! Glad I stayed up long enough to read this one. |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
kris- wowza! what a lovely look at that beautiful heart of yours. i agree w/ Janet...you sure do got this imagery free verse thing down pat girlie! just simply beatiful this is ...but then again i would expect no less from you! love ya my friend amy "A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart & can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words." |
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DreamLess Member
since 2001-02-28
Posts 92 |
the words are very lovely ... the pic and the yellow colour and every thing it puts you in the mood WRITTEN BY ME..(17 YRS HIGHSCHOOL GIRL) EASY ON ME.. I'M JUST AN AMATEUR |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
just beautiful..this I shall save...has much meaning to me thank you ~Wynter "The worst prison would be a closed heart". ...Pope John Paul II |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
I LOOK for your poetry.....you never disappoint. Kathleen Blake "When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey." Laurie Lee |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
For some reason, I can't see the picture (and I'm on a REAL computer, not my poor dinosaur *G*) but the beauty of your words stands strong without the addition... I like the romance of it... and the promise. *S* |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
TA: I'm glad you did too!! thank you so much!! Aims: oh, now, my dear friend...you are so sweet! thank you for your always thoughtful responses! yer da best! -e ~~~~~ Dreamless: thanks so much! I'm glad you got that! it was what I was going for! I'm glad you liked it! Wynter: and that means so much to me...I am am happy to hear that it has meaning to you...thanks, my friend! Kathleen: now, my friend...you are too sweet! that means a lot to hear that, ya know? thank you so very much!! suthern: aww...i'm sorry you can't see the picture...it is quite lovely, I thought. It's a very nice autumn scene...but, thank you so much for your wonderful reply! I truly appreciate it your kind words! sp do I believe we'd be better off apart? can I see my world without you in it? baby, not for a single minute... |
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kitkat Senior Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 878Nova Scotia |
*sighs* may you hear that song play for ever. |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Very lovely, Snowpants! Beautifully written and presented! |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
kitkat: why thank you...and, yes...I hope so too!! Denise: thank you so much, my friend! It's good to see you!! sp do I believe we'd be better off apart? can I see my world without you in it? baby, not for a single minute... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
(via the phone)... the "teach" says this is a wonderful write of imagery and expression and your free verse has grown much. (But) the teach wants to see you go for the rhyme again... so your assigment for the week is to write a rhyming poem ASAP (Friday by 5 pm is good for me)  and no using the weather as an excuse that you cant get to class ************ sorry girlie...I only type what Im told too LOL a bossy cowboy with a phone card is dangerous thing LOL JM |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
like it |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
JM: ok...don't worry...I don't blame you...I'd listen to a 'cowboy with a phone card' too!! sheesh...demanding!! but, tell him I said thank you for the wonderful comment, but NOT for the assignment, 'cuz now I'll have to pull an all-nighter for this one!! Thanks a LOT!! and, dangit...the weather...hmmm...I was gonna use that one, 'cuz it's worked pretty much against me so far, so I figured I'd make SOME use of it, but I GUESS NOT!! (thanks, jm, for the message, btw!! )vandana: thanks! glad you liked it!! sp do I believe we'd be better off apart? can I see my world without you in it? baby, not for a single minute... |
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