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Open Poetry #12
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Tonight Into Words
| Open Poetry #12 |
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Tonight Into Words |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
Tonight Into Words I need to think, I need to feel…just enough to get tonight into words Tomorrow the moment will be vague; I’ll remember the setting But not how it felt… The way my hand shook as I cut someone else’s wedding cake How my heart raced faster than my feet towards the back door When the DJ played that song I never expected to be played How I imagined us dancing, in a world alone, when they danced the first dance How I regret your memory is not of the best of me That I missed you every moment of their celebrated love That I stood out back, smoked a cigarette And told you I was sorry How I mourn the truth that we will never be together in this way. I thought of us tonight, at someone else’s wedding… I just wanted you to know. |
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| © Copyright 2001 JLR - All Rights Reserved | |||
SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Just going right for the heart here.....this is amazing.....powerfully emotional....fantastic writing!  SEA |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
words into tonight. . . heartfelt my friend. . . -------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Hi friend...I know this feeling...oh yes I do...you wrote it so perfectly |
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Nate Dogg Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658Georgia, Fulton |
I liked this piece very much...brilliant writing! Nathan |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
Fantastically poignant, extremely believable that it is fully sincere.Well done! |
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EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
mmm... dancing....DJ's....fun! |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
JLR, poignant and vivid, well done! Write on Kethry Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Thank you for this, JLR... |
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Brian Beaudry Member
since 2001-03-03
Posts 57Northern Ontario Canada |
This piece could be felt deeply,powerful emotional outpouring!!Beautifully written!! |
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kitkat Senior Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 878Nova Scotia |
WOW! I could feel and hear your emotions in this piece. -------------- You got to get up every morning with a smile on your face and show the world all the love in your heart Then people are gonna treat |
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ATelamon Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 328Purgatory, Last Staircase, Up |
Emotion's moment captured in the shadow of existential celebration. Sad and sadder by the aloofness implied therein. AT "There is nothing so resilent and fprgiving as a heart that is open. And nothing so stony, impenetrable and closed and cold, as a heart once closed" |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
SEA---Thank you and I love it when your heart visits. Paula---I do wallow well, sometimes. Ha! Thanks, buddy (I named your little devil) Nate---Thanks for reading and complimenting. VAS---Most times it is difficult to write when a moment is as raw as this was but when I am able to I ussually find it easier to move on from it. Eagle---mmm...maybe I should have thought of that instead. Ha! Kethry---Thanks for your encouragement. Sunshine---You're very welcome. Brian---Thanks for reading and responding. And Welcome to pip! kitkat---Thank you, I guess I found the right words. AT---Captured moments painful and sad...I collect them. Thanks for reading. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
you said this perfectly.....the many times I have felt this feeling....emotions run strong....thanks for sharing this...be well and peace JLR... Greeneyes~ *** "Within you I lose myself Without you I find myself Wanting to be lost again." -Unknown |
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Celeste Senior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 597 |
 The way you've captured the emotion of this in such a quiet open way is so completely powerful. I think you're my hero! This was excellent! "Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm." ~Winston Churchill~ |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
JLR- heartfelt and emotional piece you have here! sad to read but i enjoyed it nonetheless. quite a powerful yet silent read. take care amy "A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart & can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words." |
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