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Open Poetry #12
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Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan

0 posted 2001-03-03 12:21 PM




Living each moment under the watchful stare
Walking the day feeling exposed...completely bare
Examine me and tell me how much I disappoint
Judgment is made mine with the blame you appoint

My shoes you fill with your morals and belief
I’m sequestered from a moment of silent relief
Lay heavy the words of indignation
Bring with it your own blinded revelation

The mirror you hold reflects no sin of yourself
That lays in the darkest room upon the highest shelf
Why look to you...when my faults flow abundant
And my blackened soul lays weak and repugnant

Ironic now that my daily actions...once disregarded
Now inspected...with harsh penalty cruelly imparted
Falling from grace and her warm embrace
I now lay crushed under the feet of your disgrace

Grind me with your heels of condemnation
Break away my self esteem without hesitation
I only scream that you entertain this one thought
How well have I learned the lessons...you've taught

My dear friends...worry not, I'm fine and doing better every day. This is something that I Needed to write in order to let it go~




[This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 03-03-2001).]
© Copyright 2001 Butterflies_dont_cry - All Rights Reserved
ATelamon
Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 328
Purgatory, Last Staircase, Up
1 posted 2001-03-03 12:52 PM


Strikingly said. Great last line.

"Convicted by Small Minds" if I read you correctly.

Well done

AT


"There is nothing so resilent and fprgiving as a heart that is open. And nothing so stony, impenetrable and closed and cold, as a heart once closed"

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
2 posted 2001-03-03 01:27 PM


Yes I know what you mean Butterflies! It's a long old road that doesn't have a turn in it. These unwilling lessons that you have been forced to learn have a way of turning on the one who is being so unfair....great adjectives make up the lines in this piece..it's very powerful!! ethome

The poet is like a cocoon; in him the caterpillar of the past finds rest, and from him the butterfly of the future emerges.

ocean
New Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 6

3 posted 2001-03-03 02:24 PM


Please email me Ocean if you have any questions regarding the deletion of this reply. In the future read the guidelines before posting a poem or a reply to another's poem.

Denise

[This message has been edited by Denise (edited 03-03-2001).]

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
4 posted 2001-03-03 02:28 PM


Heavy the hand that deals the blows...heavier still the heart that inflicts words that lessen who we know we are...I love you Holly...great write

We all have wings...some of us don't know why


SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
5 posted 2001-03-03 04:14 PM


Let it flow sweet Butterfly.......and remember, you are so much more than even you know..... SEA

If I let you into my heart.....
will you promise to stay?
~Sue~

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
6 posted 2001-03-03 04:36 PM


This poem is oppressive...
Friends appreciate and compliment us while our enemies dispise us and criticize us...James



Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
7 posted 2001-03-03 04:48 PM


Talk about poetic cleansing. Well said my dear friend. I am so glad that you have found your voice. It is sometimes easier to confront a past demon when we already are under full steam and you demonstrate that so well. Your words ring sharp but they are done so in such a wonderful poetic piece that the sting is left only to those that still judge and condemn without ever having tried understanding and listening. Fly high my sweet butterfly of today's world and I will sit back with smiles and laughter as you shower us all with your beauty and strength. Oh yeah, I almost forgot....I loved the choice of words used to nail the rhyme together with great impact and your pauses within the lines were done superbly.

There see, I can critique your poems objectively and after all, that is one of the reasons we learn to grow so well isn't it? ( cheez.....and to think I said I would never use these guys....well, after all, it is only a back scratch isn't it?)

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
8 posted 2001-03-03 04:50 PM


well Butterfly I don't think anyone can say they feel exactly what you are feeling or have been going through although I will try by saying it's not easy....no one ever said all life would be..and I am telling you that I go back and forth feeling these same things..I am almost looking forward to a huge storm they are calling for, so that with each shovel of snow I will toss the anger and hurt away from me...

a very good write

huggsss and hoping each day improves

~Wynter/Maureen/Moonchild


"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II



Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2001-03-03 04:59 PM


Ironic now that my daily actions...once disregarded
Now inspected...with harsh penalty cruelly imparted
Falling from grace and her warm embrace
I now lay crushed under the feet of your disgrace

Grind me with your heels of condemnation
Break away my self esteem without hesitation
I only scream that you entertain this one thought
How well have I learned the lessons...you've taught

=====================


"Ironic now that my daily actions...once disregarded
Now inspected...with harsh penalty cruelly imparted"

yes...exactly.. the lack of respect and equal treatement ...
the lack of returned effort ...
its does indeed cut deep....

"I only scream that you entertain this one thought
How well have I learned the lessons...you've taught"

whew...that cuts deep too...
powerful purge of the pen me girlie...
but I know with every release you get stronger and heal ...
awesome writing baby...
they cant all be love poem *winkie*
love ya me SS
me

You Break It
by Diana De Witt/J.Tesh

I've tried to tell you but its fallen on deaf ears ...
how hard youve been on my heart
If thats the way you wanna play
I cant compete ...
Youve given me the bitter ...
now I want the sweet.

you know... everything you do ...
comes back on you ...
everything you do ... comes back on you.

If you can hear me ...
consider this a warning.
something your mama left out--
When its concerning matters of the heart ..
you better play fair right from the start.

cause ...you know...everything you do ...
comes back on you ...
everything you do ...comes back on you ...

If you break it...youre gonna pay for it...
If you break my heart ... youre gonna pay for it.

Maybe you would rather choose to not believe it...
Maybe you'll just hide your eyes
but the truth has a strange way of revealing
and my heart wont be the price ..

you know...everything you do ...
comes back on you ...
everything you do ...comes back on you ...

If you break it...youre gonna pay for it...
If you break my heart ... youre gonna pay for it.

Truth sees thru all disguise ...
and my heart will not be the prize.

everything you do ...
comes back on you ...
everything you do ...comes back on you ...

If you break it...youre gonna pay for it...
If you break my heart ... youre gonna pay for it.
(everything you do comes back on you)



Strange ... the desire for certain pleasures is a part of my pain.
~Kahlil Gibran~

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
10 posted 2001-03-03 05:12 PM


Big hugs to all of you, the reason for this poem is this...I live in a very small town and my current situation has left much room for judgement and opinion. My real point in the poem was to cleanse some of the feelings that have been weighing me down, it was not directed at any one person and I've always been of the "turn the other cheek" mentality. But to be honest...the rumors that are started and the half truths that are believed....well they hurt, I've always lived my life "doing on to others...." you know...living the golden rules, sure I've stepped on some toes in my life too. The lesson that I was referring to in the end of the poem is seeing how much it hurts to be judged and remembering the pain that you can cause someone without ever touching them...and making doubly sure that I think before I speak...."judge not....lest ye be judged". There was an case of mistaken identity here and I again want to say that this was written with no one imparticular as the subject or for that matter no one situation.
Thank you for your words of kindness...my heart always feels cleansed after a visit to the walls of this place....Love to all~


[This message has been edited by Butterflies_dont_cry (edited 03-03-2001).]

Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
11 posted 2001-03-03 08:06 PM


BDC wonderful piece of writing and as long as when you look into your heart you are at peace, and I'm sure you are, then let the others go hang. I've never believed in judging, besides I would forever disappoint anyone looking for a saint. This is an astounding and wonderfully powerful piece and I'm sure that you now feel tons better. Your spirit shines, your wings will help you fly and in truth and beauty you will be free.
Take care love as always
Mushy

Fly free butterfly





Take back the hope you gave,- I claim
Only a memory of the same
Robert Browning



Mother_Earth
Senior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 1370
1/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan
12 posted 2001-03-03 08:34 PM


My Butterfly kid, you are getting so strong!!
I know " sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me!" looks easy to live by, but the words and the "friends" they come from, hurt! I KNOW you , as the new person you have become, will be able to turn the other cheek. Life is too short. Remember who you are! And that is my kid and I don't believe you can fail. It is "the others" that have the problem.
Love and hugs, my kid, Mom

Voiceless
Senior Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 686
Under the stars upon the wind
13 posted 2001-03-03 08:38 PM


So true...
Very well done!


~*Peachy Be*~

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
14 posted 2001-03-03 10:06 PM


amazing....









Greeneyes~




***


"Within you I lose myself
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again."
-Unknown



SwEeTnSeXy18
Member
since 2000-09-18
Posts 247
nc
15 posted 2001-03-03 10:14 PM


holly-

this was so powerfully written.
quite intense--every stanza just
flowed together perfectly. awesome
write my friend...just awesome. and
may you heal and purge with every
word you write with that wonderful
pen of yours!

take care
love ya
amy

~in order to gain, you have to lose~


Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
16 posted 2001-03-03 11:40 PM


we will always have friends. . . sometimes, in the most unlikely of places. . . and in the most unlikely of guises. . . and they will teach us the lessons of life. . .

excellent Holly. . . good to see you back here these days. . .

-----------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
17 posted 2001-03-04 05:46 PM


A wonderful title graces a powerful poem here... Wagging tongues don't care how much pain their lashes inflict... but sometimes it helps to remember that when someone is pointing a finger at you, 3 times that many fingers are pointing back at them. *S*
Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
18 posted 2001-03-04 08:49 PM


BDC,

Powerful poetry here my friend. Judgment of any kind to anyone is just not fair yet it continues. People say things without thinking of the impact it will have on another's life. I am sorry you have had to go through such a thing. You know where I am if need me. Take care you. (((((hugs)))))

Lone Wolf


Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats

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