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Open Poetry #12
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Red Rock
| Open Poetry #12 |
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Red Rock |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California 
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RED ROCK Silence golden, I feel the eyes Of Beauty as she sleeps. In worlds frozen, a soft wind cries Of promises she keeps. A dream, surreal, I almost feel The moment lost to time. To beckon chance, I steal my glance, And sound a soundless chime. Stock-still, muted, ne'er refuted Tower these spires of sand. Foretell the trust of strength in Dust, Now sifted through my hand. As sweet whispers befall the ears Of Gods yet sleeping near, I pray, I yearn, not for return But that they take me here. Unto the brilliant reds, the golds, Adance beneath the sun. Until resilient Night unfolds And Shadow makes us one. With breathless sigh, I know that I Alone might know her worth. But should I pass this night, alas, I've seen the soul of earth. Michael Anderson But dreams of those who dream as I, Aspiringly, are damned and die. EAP [This message has been edited by Michael (edited 03-01-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Michael, my pal.... This is superb... Aside from your wonderful theme, I'm looking at the construction of this gem... Your internal rhyme gives this piece a nice cadence... I was going to be critical and comment that you had a couple of lines that were lacking it, but then I read and re-read... and I found that those couple of lines rhyme internally with their corresponding end rhymed lines in those stanzas... Does that make sense?.. It's pretty early here... Nice job, Mike...  |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Michael~ Such beauty in the movement of this piece. Makes for a wonderful way to begin this day. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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mystic requiem Member
since 2001-01-26
Posts 144 |
Your writings are fantastic and this one is no exception. YOU have talent...no lie. (offers you the 'One Wish' prize)   *thanx*  mYsTiC |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
This is exceptional, Michael. (IRish Rose) Kathleen Blake "When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey." Laurie Lee |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Michael, Excellent writing, Internal and external. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
*sigh......perfect. It's a lovely read... |
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Poeminister Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862Regina SK; Canada |
"Unto the brilliant reds, the golds, Adance beneath the sun. Until resilient Night unfolds And Shadow makes us one." I very much love the flow and feeling to this...as always, excellent writing. Poeminister "life is the Childhood of our immortality" --Goethe |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Nan, try as I might I could not get my muse to cooperate with me and the rhyme scheme I would have liked throughout this piece. In the end, my muse won out as always - I am but a slave to the pen you know. Marge, if I could I would start everyday here - here being Red Rock Canyon. Truly one of the most majestic places I have ever been. mYsTiC, O.K., I've made my wish but it almost made me feel guilty when it seems all I've ever wished for has already found me within the last year. Kathleen, I'm glad you enjoyed the piece. I wondered about the cadence with the change in rhyme scheme in stanzas 1 and 5. Did it seem to flow properly to you even so? Ah, Sy, ‘tis true the best writing starts within, no? Sharon,  Poeminister, next time I go to Red Rock, I'll remember my camera and post a pic for you. Though I doubt even a photograph can fully capture the essence of this place, it might at least give you a hint of this inspiration behind this piece.  Thank you all for the kind replies. Michael |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
A beautiful poem dedicated to a beautiful place ... we need to go back soon, dear. Smooches Linda |
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mystic requiem Member
since 2001-01-26
Posts 144 |
Hahahahahaha! I see you are a wise man, because you have already figured out the majik of a wish. May you and your home be blessed!! *wink* mYsTiC |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Silence golden, I feel the eyes Of Beauty as she sleeps. In worlds frozen, a soft wind cries Of promises she keeps. A dream, surreal, I almost feel The moment lost to time. To beckon chance, I steal my glance, And sound a soundless chime. Stock-still, muted, ne'er refuted Tower these spires of sand. Foretell the trust of strength in Dust, Now sifted through my hand. ============================= never doubt your rhymes gift or its ability to impress ... as does the imagery and level of inspire you shared here. outstanding write M, its obvious how much of an impression and effect this beautiful place made on you ... as your poetry always does on us  Strange ... the desire for certain pleasures is a part of my pain. ~Kahlil Gibran~ |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Michael--superb!! |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
quote: I would love to visit a place like that. Thanks for taking me there in your poem.  |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Michael I enjoyed reading your poem...James |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
A wonderful write, poet sir, you make pastels of words. Thank you, Regards, Olias. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
And you've shared that soul with us... you don't need a camera, Michael, when you paint so beautifully with words. |
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