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Open Poetry #12
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Are all knights in shining armor? (well yuh but hehe)
| Open Poetry #12 |
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Are all knights in shining armor? (well yuh but hehe) |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) 
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There, in sunbeam, stands a savior Sword of knight; he promises As he nears I begin to doubt He draws his blade and slashes me He says forever I’ll live without I tell him he is quite mistaken Does not recall the falling sunbeam That glided o’er the crystal waves Compared to this upon his shoulder The sun sets soft on mossy graves He's too strong I must succumb I kneel and praise upon his glory He lays the blade and cuts my ear Where enchanted forest bears me sway The blood that flows of crimson tears Ivory chalice might passion-filled For I refused it at his knee I pressed upon him to be my savior He laughed and drank, the swine! How I’d not share in his behavior? I drug his armor; we enclosed Although I drank not of his passion His eyes were muddied. Fists were swinging. He was making bedroom eyes at me From the trees I heard blissful singing This sword is heavy, I understand As he turns to follow youthful merry, A brute could only bear such a weight I heft it upon my hip and swing Maybe a savior is such his fate The sunbeam kiss on soldier’s grave And in my basket there’s a chalice In the forest I sit softly humming To the tune of sweet sunbeam’s song I bid for anyone worthy, coming I bid the cup not run o’er with blood Of my heart I cherished in his hands I close my eyes to spill and prepare it My mind, my soul, my last words, I swing “You’ll never hurt again I swear it!” [This message has been edited by wayoutwalt (edited 02-23-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Walt Burns - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Walt, one thing that does not change is your versatility..this is a very powerful piece of writing...let me be the first to say "well done"... |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
My goodness, Walt ~ When you dig in - you really dig in ! This is exceptional. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Wow, an unhappy but just ending. Well done! Kethry Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen. |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
thanking you all for the kind replies thanky |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
very different read, but I certainly enjoyed it's depth  and form~Wynter "The worst prison would be a closed heart". ...Pope John Paul II |
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Alicat Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094Coastal Texas |
Whoa Walt....this one took me a few readings. For some reason, I saw a mentor-type person, like a father figure, worshipped by a child or student, only to find the base depravity lurking just beneath his fragile eggshell hide. In another thought runs the feeling this this one is a very poetic and moving slam agaist the White Knights, also known in some circles as the Ku Klux Klan, and the refusal to follow such blind, hateful ideology. Either way, if'n I'm not completely off base and simply spittin in the wind, this was one excellent piece of work, Walt. I are amazed! Alicat “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.” Charles Darwin |
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Voiceless Senior Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 686Under the stars upon the wind |
What can i say... It is superb! A poem that you hate to see end. ~*Peachy Be*~ |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
Walt, you developed your theme further than I had anticipated, and it worked. Depth and intrigue is what I read. Very nice! (o: Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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cruz Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 282Dallas,Texas USA |
Youve taken me into this forest setting where only 2 people exist. Bloody passion is expressed more ways than 1. The wounded becomes the attacker and is left all alone in the confused world. I have to say Im still absorbing your spilled beans and cant get enough. I like the dragging of the armor, mossy graves, muddied eyes and blissful singing. So, I guess all knights are not in shining armor. |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Walt~ this is just amazing........excellent writing!! SEA |
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wayoutwalt Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870TEXAS (it's all big) |
ya'll been real nice thanky |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Walty, so much depth in this poem, oh and such wonderful imagery. "His eyes were muddied" I loved this line so much, it portrayed an image of this man in my mind and it was like WOW. Well Done Walty buddy Maree |
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elisaseyes Member
since 1999-07-15
Posts 196fort worth texas |
Walt-o-Meal, I really love this. (grin) |
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NC Member
since 2001-02-20
Posts 89 |
a great read! love the way you've done this one |
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