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Open Poetry #12
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Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

0 posted 2001-02-20 08:45 PM


on that ending night
in the darkness I beheld
your shadow of light

breathing into you
the essence of my dark heart
as I held you close

we moved into time
together into the night
Dark I, Shadow she

----------------------------------------------------------------------


To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

© Copyright 2001 John Garcia - All Rights Reserved
Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
1 posted 2001-02-20 08:51 PM


Nice one Sven....really liked the ending line.
ParisGrl
Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 610

2 posted 2001-02-20 08:52 PM


John,

I really like this.......Keep up the good work.

~Laura~

kcsgrandma
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522
Presque Isle, ME
3 posted 2001-02-21 01:18 AM


Very nice, Sven. The second one is my favorite.

To love another person is to see the face of God.
- Les Miserables

Marilyn

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

4 posted 2001-02-21 01:45 AM


Now Sven, that title of your's just pulled me in, but I bet you knew it would and I must say sweetPoetFriend I enjoyed reading your poem...

"breathing into you the essence of my dark heart as I held you close" ...   precious  

~coco~




[This message has been edited by CocoBaci (edited 02-21-2001).]

Puck
Junior Member
since 2001-02-21
Posts 14
Oberon's Palace
5 posted 2001-02-21 11:18 AM


I really think this is wonderful, I love the whole thing, it is really really great

from you I gather more magic dust and I'll sprinkle it about. But I know where to come for more now.


Iam that merry wanderer of the night
I jest to Oberon, and make him smile
Puck

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
6 posted 2001-02-21 11:20 AM



softly seen by sun
magic mystery dancing
sweetly romancing

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
7 posted 2001-02-21 01:16 PM



Wonderful! The last line is my favourite. Both dark and loving, well penned

Take care,
Melissa~

devina
Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539
Cali
8 posted 2001-02-21 02:00 PM


Beautifully done my dear, as always...miss you hun!!!

Open arms can be the most fragile in the world...



Sven
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East Lansing, MI USA
9 posted 2001-02-21 07:43 PM


Ali, thanks. . . I've been exploring the darkness recently. . . glad that you liked. . .

Laura, thank you. . . and thank you for reading. . .

Marilyn, yes. . . it's my favorite as well. . . thank you. . .

poetFriend Coco, no. . . I didn't plan it that way. . . but I'm glad that you liked the title and that you enjoyed the poem. . .

Puck, thank you. . . I seem to have found more of that dust recently. . .

Sunshine, thank you so much my friend. . . your words are wonderful. . .

Melissa, dark and loving. . . thank you. . . isn't it amazing that you can find this in the dark???

Devina!!!! Hey mommy!!! So wonderful to see you!! Thank you so much. . . .I miss you too. . . as do a lot of other people. . . come back soon!!!

----------------------------------------------------------


To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136
Mobile, AL
10 posted 2001-02-21 10:25 PM


Excellence as always, Sven!

Celeste
Senior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 597

11 posted 2001-02-21 11:11 PM


A mood captured and held wonderfully. Excellent writing.

To capture and live a moment is truly living


ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
12 posted 2001-03-23 03:45 AM


we moved into time
together into the night
Dark I, Shadow she"

Love this idea Sven! Great work!

The poet is like a cocoon; in him the caterpillar of the past finds rest, and from him the butterfly of the future emerges.

PoeticKnight
Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA
13 posted 2001-03-23 09:10 AM


The master of romantic darkness...I agree about the last line, superb.
Mabel A. Dilley
Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 859
Seattle, WA, USA
14 posted 2001-03-23 10:47 AM


Amazing achievement in short lines, a snapshot of a moment in time.

"I am not now that which I have been."

Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
15 posted 2001-03-23 12:53 PM


Temptress, thank you. . .  

Celeste, thank you my friend. . . it's a mood I like. . .

ethome, thank you for retruning this. . . glad that you enjoyed!!  

PK, "Romantic Darkness". . . hmmmmmmmmm. . . you may have given me an idea. . . thank you. . .

Julian, thank you my friend. . .  

------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

coyote
Senior Member
since 2001-03-17
Posts 1077

16 posted 2001-03-23 10:18 PM


Sven, brother.
This is really great work.
"Dark I, Shadow She."
The epitome of laconic expression.
Loved it.

"The poet is the priest of the invisible."
Wallace Stevens

Greeneyes
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In Your Poetic Mind
17 posted 2001-03-24 12:55 PM


breathing into you
the essence of my dark heart
as I held you close"


this is beautiful.....with your touch of passion and class....


Greeneyes~


***

"Within you I lose myself
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again."
-Unknown



RMW
Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424

18 posted 2001-03-24 02:07 PM


Sven,

"Shadow of light.." I like that.

Bob

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
19 posted 2001-03-24 03:48 PM


Sven,
I've read this three times now, I just can't frame the words for a reply, so I will offer only this, *HuGS*
Kethry

Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen.



Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
20 posted 2001-03-24 04:21 PM


Sven - very nice writing my friend, very nice indeed. Much meaning, few words, I liked it.

BC

Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
21 posted 2001-03-24 05:04 PM


coyote, thank you so much. . .

Greeneyes, passion and class. . . wow. . . thank you. . .

Bob, thanks. . . glad that you liked it. . .

Kethry, that's all I need to hear. . . thank you my friend. . .

Bill, thank you my friend. . . it's great to be able to say so much with so little. . .

-------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Voiceless
Senior Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 686
Under the stars upon the wind
22 posted 2001-03-24 10:54 PM


short and sweet..


~*Peachy Be*~

Mother_Earth
Senior Member
since 2000-11-20
Posts 1370
1/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan
23 posted 2001-03-26 08:58 PM


Sven, for some reason, I have the feeling that the one that broke your heart is responsable for your new type of poetry. It is beautiful. Hugs, ME
Charisma
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since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
24 posted 2001-03-27 08:55 AM


*sigh* wonderful senryus....loved reading these fabulous serie.

((hugs))
Charisma

seraphin
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1004
Michigan
25 posted 2001-03-27 12:23 PM


Once again, wonderful my friend! Library material.
Sven
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Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
26 posted 2001-03-27 12:51 PM


Voiceless, thank you. . .  

ME, the one that broke my heart??  Well, no. . . but thank you for your words. . .  

Charisma, thank you my friend. . .

Seraphin, thank you so much. . .  

------------------------------------------------------------


To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

[This message has been edited by Sven (edited 03-27-2001).]

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