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Open Poetry #12
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In the moonlight. . . (new challenge response)
| Open Poetry #12 |
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In the moonlight. . . (new challenge response) |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA 
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standing here at the gates to the realm of dreams Shadow, the gatekeeper, meets me once again clad in blackest of gowns, she takes my hand and leads me inside this isn't my first time here but tonight, Shadow tells me that she has something new to share with me and, in breathless anticipation, I follow her but, of course, I'd follow her anywhere she brings me to a large, open field I can see the green grass stretching as far as the eye can see the moon above glistening on every drop of dew illuminating like the thousands of stars above Shadow smiles at me, and takes my hand that's when I hear the music start and that's when I notice that the orchestra has appeared playing String of Pearls and in the moonlight, Shadow's dancing with me we move together, as if on air, floating above the blades of grass barely bending them with our footsteps we move and turn, and twist and fly through the air carried on wings of moonlight and music Shadow smiles at me, and I smile back at her, this is more wonderful than I could have ever dreamed and yet, is it really a dream?? I really don't care, I want to dance with her forever, holding her hand in mine, her dark features complementing my own in our dance of love and ecstasy. . . the music stops. . . the sun's on the rise Shadow tells me. . . we only have a few moments more. . . I know. . . I say. . .and I hold her close to me one last time. . . thank you Shadow. . . I manage to get out between tears of leaving. . . you're welcome Dark. . . she says with a smile of love on her face. . . and I wake up with the dawn. . . missing her touch, missing our dance, missing her voice and waiting for the moon to rise again so that I can bid farewell to the light for I am now, and ever will be forever in love with the night. . . --------------------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. [This message has been edited by Sven (edited 02-19-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 John Garcia - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Tennessee Angel Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661Tennessee |
Wow, Sven!! I don't know what the challenge was, but this piece is superb!! I was with you every step and I could almost hear the music. Loved it!  |
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Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136Mobile, AL |
In the moonlit path of gates swung wide open..That is where I'm seeing you in this. A beautiful poem, Sven. Guard your keys well. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
A good twist, and a delightful read....well done Sven.... |
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ATelamon Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 328Purgatory, Last Staircase, Up |
the canvas comes to life painted with your words well done indeed AT |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
WOW! I don't quite know what to say....I just went on a trip through a wonderful fantasy! This is excellent Sven! I love how you have constructed the lines for emphasis on certain parts of the related emotions....I really enjoyed this so much Sven! The poet is like a cocoon; in him the caterpillar of the past finds rest, and from him the butterfly of the future emerges. |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Sven this has a triple M rating. Magical, musical, Mystical. Who could ask for more? Certainly not me. BTW Sister moon is waiting for a response. *S* Write on. Kethry Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Sven~ Very, very nicely portrayed. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Tennessee Angel, the challenge is an old one, and it's to write a poem with the line "In the moonlight, shadow's dancing". . . and I really like it, because this is the 3rd poem I've written with that line in it!!! Thank you for reading. . . and I'm glad that you enjoyed. . . Temptress, yes, I've been there many times before. . . and don't worry. . . I'm not letting these keys go easily!!! Thank you my friend. . . Sunshine, thank you. . . I'm always good for a twist aren't I??  AT, thank you. . . glad that I could paint this one for you. . . ethome, thank you. . . I'm glad that it turned out that way. . .I've always liked to play with the lines like that. . . glad that you noticed. . . Kethry. . . MMM-rated eh??? I love it!!! I'll have to remember that for later. . . and don't worry Sister Moon, Brother Sun is working as we speak. . . Marge, thank you my friend. . . that's what I was going for. . . --------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
My goodness, see what I miss while I'm stuck on my couch? This is superb! Wonderful dreaming. I am in love with the night, too. Sandra |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
There is a different form of life after the sun goes down..it's very intriguing. Nicely written Sven.  |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
AD dear heart, this is utterly beautiful, really superb, I loved the whole of this it carried me with it. And if you're going dancing why didn't you tell me, I'd have put my glitzy frock on Really fabulous piece dear heart Take care as always love Bubbles Take back the hope you gave,- I claim Only a memory of the same Robert Browning |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
*wow*.....or more a *sigh*....don't know yet, all I know is that it takes my breath away....love this jewel. ((hugs)) Charisma |
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Moon Dust
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
Wow, sweet dreams Sven ~FKA Maria Byrne~ |
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Sven
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937East Lansing, MI USA |
Sandra, stuck on the couch?? That's no place to be!! Thank you for dreaming with me my friend. . . deVine, yes. . . I'm finding that out. . . thank you. . . Bubbles, if I would have known that you wanted to come, I would have asked you. . . thank you my friend. . . Charimsa, I'll take either or both of those. . . thank you so much!! Moon Dust, indeed my dreams are wonderful. . . thank you. . . ---------------------------------------------------------- To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world. |
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