navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #12 » Revenge of the Keyboard (for Nan)
Open Poetry #12
Post A Reply Post New Topic Revenge of the Keyboard (for Nan) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

0 posted 2001-02-04 05:07 PM



Revenge of the Keyboard


There she was eating her meal
(it was clam sauce over linguini)
thinking she’d read at Passions awhile
no thought spared for spacebar or key

An errant blip sent the plate teetering
linguini and sauce flew everywhere
onto the keyboard, onto the floor,
in her lap, in her shoes, in her hair

Words flowed smoothly from poet’s lips
but nary a one can be written here
With a shake and slam she realized
this mess she could never clear

So off she went with sawbuck in hand
purchasing a keyboard off the rack
brought it home, hooked it up
and checked for what it might lack

Twenty-six letters, she counted each one
all tidy, they sat side by side
She used them all sometimes twice in one word
It was a matter of poet’s pride

And in the corner, poor keyboard lay
Clams jamming his keys in a mess
But inside he smiled, a vacation he earned
From the fingers of Nancy Ness!


© Copyright 2001 Poet deVine - All Rights Reserved
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136
Mobile, AL
1 posted 2001-02-04 05:21 PM




This is the Department of Protection for Computers. You're under arrest for your part in the death of your keyboard Miss Ness! You will not get a trial, you will not pass go, and you will not collect 200 dollars. The warrant clearly states GO TO JAIL! Now, we want the names of your accomplices.




Cute poem Miss Devine. Thanks for the tip!

[This message has been edited by Temptress (edited 02-04-2001).]

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
2 posted 2001-02-04 05:26 PM


Poet deVine - one has forgotten the zinfendal.  hehehe

BC

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

3 posted 2001-02-04 05:27 PM


Oh, this is priceless.  Once I spilled taco sauce on the bottom row of mine!
ha ha  

"I walked beside the evening sea and dreamed a dream that could not be." George William Curtis



Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2001-02-04 05:29 PM


And sadly, this is true! Nancy was eating a big plate of linguini with clam sauce (oily nasty stuff! - this is MY opinion). She sat down and whoosh! Her plate upended onto her keyboard! Alas! What was she to do? Picking the chunks of clam out from between the letters D and F, she realized she better get a new one. And so she purchased a cheap one for $20. I asked her if it had the same alphabet as the other one (a nice ergonomic one - love mine!). She was silent a long time and I thought I could hear her singing the alphabet song.....
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
5 posted 2001-02-04 05:37 PM


The funny part is - Every time I typed the letter "a" it automatically had an "f" with it... and... It started to put every new word back at the left margin... so I had to either read my sentences backwards, or think inside out and post the last word first... working back to the first one last... Ya had to be here... This place still STINKS...

ROOOOOOOOOONNNNNN.... Can't I save the old one??? What can I do???....It was my friend... and extension of me, ya know???..

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
6 posted 2001-02-04 07:28 PM


LOL  

This is too funny deVine. . . don't feel so bad Nan, I once dumped a whole bottle of orange juice on a telephone switchboard at my office!!  LOL

-------------------------------------------------------


To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

kcsgrandma
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522
Presque Isle, ME
7 posted 2001-02-05 12:50 PM


  There probably isn't a person here who hasn't spilled something into a keyboard (but into a switchboarrd at work?? Yikes!).  Thanks for sharing this in such a clever way.

To love another person is to see the face of God.
- Les Miserables

Marilyn

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

8 posted 2001-02-05 01:05 AM


OH...this is funny and somehow tragic too...
chuckling...poor Nan...I am so sorry, and linguini with clam sauce?  Sharon, you know not what you are missing!  FUNNY, FUNNY, poet people!

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
9 posted 2001-02-05 09:19 AM


Ron said somewhere that he soaks his keyboard in the bathtub....but he lets it dry for months before he uses it....
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
10 posted 2001-02-06 11:45 AM


ROFL! I'm sure I wouldn't have been laughing, but when I heard this it cracked me up. YUCK on those clams though.  

I was about to say the same thing Sharon about Ron soaking it in his bathtub. I remembered that one. LOL

laryalee
Member
since 2000-06-19
Posts 352
Alberta, Canada
11 posted 2001-02-06 02:46 PM


What a hoot!  It does, however, remind me of when my dear little granddaughter spilled milk on my keyboard...panic! (Even wondered about keeping a spare in the cupboard *g*)
A well-designed chuckle, thanks so much!
Lary

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
12 posted 2001-02-06 02:56 PM


my only problem is that backspace and delete doesnt' work so after i type anything, whether it be poetry or a letter or my grocery list or a list of goals in life emailed to myself because i can't keep track, i have no choice but to push send because also the mouse won't select to erase anything so just remember this when you see me say stupid things that don't make sense or if it looks like i'm NUTs or angry or out there somewhere ...because i have no way to change them ...but as far as nan's keyboard is concerned, all i know is she told me this little tidbit and i laughed but also felt soooooooo much empathy because i know what it's like to make fatal errors that cost a lot and i'm rambling again, so please excuse me because all i'm trying to say here is....


.... enjoyed your poem, sharon  

Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
13 posted 2001-02-06 03:25 PM


ROFLMAO.....these was really a funny read...enjoyed it a lot

Charisma

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
14 posted 2001-02-06 10:20 PM


UPDATE...

With Ron's wonderfully helpful support .. ...
My ergonomic keyboard has had a leisurely bath in the kitchen sink.. and after four rinsings isn't emitting funky little chunks of clams any longer... It's now resting comfortably and in "fair" condition on a lovely purple towel on the counter... where it will probably stay for the next week or so...Here's hoping...

Sunlit Soul
Junior Member
since 2001-02-05
Posts 37
Never Land
15 posted 2001-02-06 10:28 PM


LOL, how very funny!  And a true story at that?  Doubly funny!  Awesome poem here, I'm glad I got the chance to read!

"Every man dies. Not every man lives."
-Tim Robbins

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #12 » Revenge of the Keyboard (for Nan)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary