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Open Poetry #12
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jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298


0 posted 2001-01-31 09:54 AM


So good
at stopping the water works,
I nod to myself,
I should get paid overtime for this.
Yes, I dammed up the anger and the
seemingly unstoppable tears
after your leaving and
handily muddied over
my dislike of myself
when I couldn't sever
my want for you.
I stuck my finger in my ears
when your voice I still craved
and down my throat when
a gallon of rocky road
couldn't cool the left over heat.
I corked and double corked the self
hatred that overflowed when I could
no longer deny the loss
was because of my own weakness.
I let my persistent, though
unexplainable, need for you
filter into the cracks.

There,
I clap my hands and survey
my handiwork;
all faults are disposed of,
any remaining memories,
set afloat,
everything is taken care of...oh yes
I am good.

But spitefully unrelenting,
the dam continues to fill.
Rain now threatens
from dark clouds overhead.
I fumble for the last cork.
My heart trembles,
my hands shake,
too many leaks
for just ten fingers,
destruction is imminent.

In the distance,
the sirens start to wail...

© Copyright 2001 jellybeans - All Rights Reserved
inot2B
Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205
Arkansas
1 posted 2001-01-31 10:00 AM


So sad! No one should have to feel this way and be alone. Writing out your pain may cause tears but it sure helps relieve that tightness that seems to encase your heart.
jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

2 posted 2001-01-31 01:46 PM


well, i must say this was written on a particularly down day, i am not always in tears and falling apart as my poems make me seem   thank you for your concern and your comments  
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
3 posted 2001-01-31 02:58 PM


The bad thing about corks and self-hatred... the corks keep popping out... for the pain sizzles and fizzes and bubbles out in a stream of whys and there aren't any answers. You've captured well how helpless one pair of hands are against the tide. Well done!
doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
4 posted 2001-01-31 04:20 PM


great write, jelly one...

i think we have a similar style to writing? do YOU????? well, i've had several question me, thinking i was really you but i know i'm not, though i can't quite tell you who i am, i DO know i'm not YOU.... i am me and you are you... so please keep writing and keep the colors separate, ok? i like the white ones and the black licorice ones... but only 3 a year... they're way too sweet to munch on like my daughter does... oh... and btw, it's been said around here (probably by ME), that i've totally flipped so you can believe that or not... but just believe this...

.... i liked your poem.... whoever you are.... and whoever i am .... but we BOTH know we aren't each other... that's for sure.... be well....

jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

5 posted 2001-01-31 04:31 PM


nah, I don't have a rhyming bone in my body, your work always amazes me as it reads as easy as free style, but then it still has rhythm and rhyme...and nope I am not you...nor you me, and though we might be confused in our own ways in our own lives...that still doesn't make us one in the same....
jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

6 posted 2001-01-31 04:31 PM


oops double time.....lol

[This message has been edited by jellybeans (edited 01-31-2001).]

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
7 posted 2001-01-31 04:41 PM


thanks very much, jellyone.... i appreciate that... i'm glad my work always amazes you and i assume you've been around a while without commenting since you only have 30 posts... i'm very glad i'm being read... and your work, too, is very well done and springs sincerely from the heart, i can tell by just reading it.... as far as rhyming? well, i rhyme one day and free verse the next and it all just pours out of me like a faucet somebody turned on and i  can tell your work is an outpouring of the same type of emotional muse and i respect you for it.... nice to see you... .glad to see your jellybean colors showing through.... like a rainbow, a jellybean can bounce back at you... (OMG, that not only RHYMED, but it was corny as HELL! *wink*..) - take care, poet  
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
8 posted 2001-01-31 04:47 PM


Jellybeans--I like way you wrote this...the metaphores very imaginative and the pain so real, yet, with just a touch of some kind of humor there that made me think you'll be fine.
jellybeans
Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

9 posted 2001-02-05 03:33 PM


thanks martie, and yep I will be, I just have some really sad days, and then get in the mood to write and come up with these  

no problem doreen, thanks

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