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Open Poetry #11
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LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion

0 posted 2000-12-11 11:17 AM


In response to that scalawag Toerag and his ugly poem about Balladeer (and me and Vixen).

Toerag was the Santa
On 'Deer's house that night.
Itchin' and a twitchin'
He was such a sight.

The fleas 'Deer observed
On Santa Toerag scalawag
Were not fleas at all,
But a huge case of the crabs!

I know this story's true,
Vixen told me the sorry tale.
How Santa Toerag's wayward wife,
Brought them home from jail.

Then each of the reindeer,
I know this may sound strange,
Got crabs from Toe Santa Claus
While out grazing on the range.

That red nose on Rudolph
Was a green light for our Santers,
He gave his "gift" to each,
From their tails to their antlers.

Now the stockings are all hung
On 'Deer's mantle with great care.
The lice bomb's in the fireplace,
Should Toerag Santa show his rear.

And we'll all hear Toerag say,
As the bomb sprays his bottom,
"Merry Christmas to the crabs,
How I hope that you got 'em!"

[This message has been edited by LngJhnAg (edited 12-11-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Michael Waterman - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2000-12-11 11:23 AM


bad bad bad bad boy...I know what's in your stocking....

and I'm not coming ANYWHERE near the three of you....


Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound.
KRJ




SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2000-12-11 11:23 AM


Good Grief!! LOL......FUNNY!   -SEA
BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
3 posted 2000-12-11 11:59 AM


EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!  Not quite the cute little mice and other holiday critters usually running around.... eeewwwwwww... Bonnie
Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

4 posted 2000-12-11 01:06 PM


Is it safe to reply?  



"Always be a first rate version of your self instead of a second rate version
of someone else." Marilyn Monroe


Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
5 posted 2000-12-11 02:08 PM


Replying from the mists of a hundred lice bombs just to make sure.  You are just to funny my friend. Have you been dipping in that eggnog early this year?

A life with love will have some thorns, but a life without love will have no roses.
author unknown


Startime
Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918
Canada
6 posted 2000-12-11 02:14 PM


*giggling wickedly* me thinks this Star needs to stay wrapped in stardust just to keep me safe from the three of you. Such bad boys you are *giggling*Much love to you from me.

Love I leave with you my friend whether it be in your life or of yet the essense of your dreams. http://path2riches.com


LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
7 posted 2000-12-11 03:35 PM


Karilea - Now I know you think you ought to lump me in with those two reprobates, but I assure you - I am an innocent man who has been maligned by the evil Toerag.  I can take this, but it hurts deeply to see our beloved Balladeer so viciously attacked (and me not being invited to participate).

Hi ya, lil SEA - I hope this TRUE story of Toerag's personal hygiene challenges has enlightened you.  Naturally, this also impugns Suthern's habits, too - but that is just too darn bad for her.  If a person doesn't want to get hit by shrapnel, she shouldn't stand so close to the impact area.  Right?

Bonnie - Yanno, if you do a lot of those "ewwwwwws," ol' Toerag is gonna start thinking of his pasture-mates and get lonely again.  Now, we wouldn't want that, would we?  lol

Irish - It is always safe for a lady to respond with whatever thoughts she cares to share with us lowly, undeserving men.  I humbly await your sincerest words of flattery for my poetic talents. *eager, expectant eyes*

Mark - I HAVE been drinking a lot of egg nog lately - Is there another way to brace oneself for a Toerag poem???

Star-girl - If you choose to wear nothing but filmy, diaphonous star dust, and send all your love to me, who am I to argue?  As for needing protection from the three of us, may I assure you that you need fear only those other two rascally scalawags, as I have it on good authority that they cannot hold a secret and are to never be trusted.  Now me, on the otherhand, am as trustworthy as a cat jumping off the kitchen counter when the alarm clock goes off and the family comes down to breakfast.  You can tell me any fantasy you might have and your secret will be forever safe with me.  heh heh, Long John.  I think she's gonna fall for this balderdash and then you will be told all her wicked fantasies, which you can then post on another website.  Ohhh, you are a devil!  Now just remember, Star, only I can be trusted.


rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
8 posted 2000-12-11 04:04 PM


LngJhnAg,

   ~chuckles~ Very funny   I think I have to barrow some of Mark's lice bombs just to make sure I'm safe... and I'm leaving the cookies and milk on the roof.  

~~Tara aka rp25 :o)

Startime
Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918
Canada
9 posted 2000-12-11 05:11 PM


*giggling very wickedly* Did anyone ever teach you that a Star's heat is overwhelming. After all it is my light that guides you through darkest night. As to secrets *very wicked grin* some are already posted at a site that has the heat this Star enjoys and there are many more waiting to be revealed in the dark skies in which I shine the brightest. Much love to you from me. Hugs too if you get close enough

Love I leave with you my friend whether it be in your life or of yet the essense of your dreams. http://path2riches.com


Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
10 posted 2000-12-11 05:37 PM


JngJhnAg,
Toerag is a scallywag
That really likes to brag.
But Long John threw a crab
And BOOM,busted his balloon.
Enjoyed.

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
11 posted 2000-12-12 08:01 AM


Star - I went to your website and was immediately drawn to your Fantasy site.  Naughty girl *spank spank*.  I enjoyed it very much.

Rose - I agree with you - on the roof is a good place to get your cookies - lol

Sy - Thank you for your moral support in the denouncement of that rascally hit-and-run Toerag.

Lorelei54
Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458

12 posted 2000-12-12 10:29 AM


always finding something so funny to write about!
ily
Susan

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
13 posted 2001-01-07 10:38 AM


the sailor comes up for air!!!..why you useless old scalawag...and I've been fairly nice to you lately?...Oh yea, cuz I haven't been here I guess....Oh well, time for some retribution ya worm.....this is quite good, did Lorelei write it?
LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
14 posted 2001-01-07 12:54 PM


Toe - Please don't blame the everlovely Lorelei - she was just repeating what she heard everybody else say - heh
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