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Open Poetry #11
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Poeminister
Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862
Regina SK; Canada

0 posted 2000-11-20 03:09 AM



Prayer...

You ancient stars of great golden light
up high in zenithal glory bright,
adorning eternity's hue of night,
I implore thy heed. conceive my might.

Many say you will sometimes offer blessings great
for prayers delivered and that faith makes fate,
that you higher powers will generously donate
these blessings if we truley beleive and wait

All my life I've thought "gods" were humankind
and that you "powers" were but inside our mind
so foolish I thought we our own blessings designed
if we worked together being mutual and kind

But Cheif-governing Sols-you mighty bodies
thoughts must be the faults in our qualities
for I look on the governments of ants and bees
and wish humans could find such natural peace

The hand of thought threatens nature's spot
it feels like I'm watching the whole world rot
when I watch news about people getting shot
and wish I could just turn off all of it

The air on this world has human breath
so rank it might lead to nature's death
technology so exceeds superficiality in breadth
it smothers and disturbs her soul underneath

She's only a child, still very young
but black tar's accumulating in her lung
a billion songs still wait to be sung
and the only hope is in our changing

I pray that all humankind will revive modesty
that has seemed out of fashion for quite a century
that people will find contentment and be happy
and that things will slow down and find simplicity

A wish for myself acompanying all of this
just for some love - for someone to kiss
on my last modicum of sanity, I'm needing bliss,
and shall not want life without your forgiveness.



"...no single sound too rude upon thy slumber shall intrude, Our thoughts, our souls-
O God above! In every deed shall mingle, love."
-Poe

© Copyright 2000 Kevin Rainbow - All Rights Reserved
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
1 posted 2000-11-20 04:25 AM


a nice prayer...


that people will find contentment and be happy
and that things will slow down and find simplicity...strong wishes

~Wynter




"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II



ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
2 posted 2000-11-20 06:54 AM


This is one of the most open minded intelligent poems I've read for quite a while. This is reality and the nice thing is it's not a God blamer...which I always thought was a cop out..it's a realistic assessment of the world situation today..and it's true....we were created as a free moral agent with the ability to think and make decisions on our own (which is the way we all want to be actually) and we've made these decisions and created these modern day tools of technology (which in many cases are extremely beneficial) and now we have to deal with the problems created by this growth... I love this poem poeminister and I really do hope you find someone to love you it's the icing on the cake of life...take care... ethome
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2000-11-20 09:23 AM


You ancient stars of great golden light
up high in zenithal glory bright,
adorning eternity's hue of night,
I implore thy heed. conceive my might.

Many say you will sometimes offer blessings great
for prayers delivered and that faith makes fate,
that you higher powers will generously donate
these blessings if we truley beleive and wait

All my life I've thought "gods" were humankind
and that you "powers" were but inside our mind
so foolish I thought we our own blessings designed
if we worked together being mutual and kind
====================
A wish for myself acompanying all of this
just for some love - for someone to kiss
on my last modicum of sanity, I'm needing bliss,
and shall not want life without your forgiveness.
=================
this is exceptional writing ....
your messages in this are of wisdom and truth...
and you have written them into a very well done and honest,sincere piece of work...
and your well done and clever rhyme scheme  is the icing on the cake...
perfect flow and cadence
excellent work
take care
jm

There are moments ...
when I Love you
beyond the limits of my human heart ...

...you will always be mine.

Collin Raye


Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

4 posted 2000-11-20 11:00 AM


Love the rhyme scheme, and not an easy one to achieve!

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses
over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey.""
Laurie Lee

Kathleen



Lighthousebob
Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725
California
5 posted 2000-11-20 01:06 PM


What a realization from the spiritualistic humankind to the humanistic forgiven kind you have displayed in your fine writing... and I want you to know that I am bowing myself right next to you for such a grace as this.

Bob <><

Marsha
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423
Maidstone Kent England
6 posted 2000-11-20 01:17 PM


Poetminister, this is really very intellegent and well written poem. What we wouldn't give to live in a simpler time. I often think that if I could have some time to do this or that, but if i really needed it, I'm sure I'd find it. We all make excuses, but in reality which of us would jump off the merry go round if we could. Not as many as say they would I think. Although right at this moment I would not only jump off, I'd fly off.
Really great work from you.
Take care
               Marsha


Take back the hope you gave,- I claim
Only a memory of the same
Robert Browning

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