»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #10
»
Ethereal
| Open Poetry #10 |
|
Ethereal |
|
Masked Intruder
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets 
|
I drift unnoticed Amongst friends and lovers Gazing deeply into The teary eyes of mourners. Memories mix with reality As twisted metal played in a movie, With shattering glass As the soundtrack. A ray of sun breaks the heavy air, Stirring me from my reverie, And makes the dull wood finish Shine like polished ivory. I watch the speaker's mouth move, Slow motion lips produce no sound. My hand goes to my head As headlights came quickly closer, And he shouted his last, And I heard my last. I fade back into reality Approaching the glass-fronted casket. I tarry to sniff complacently At the bright red rose laying there, As I remember the one I received that night. We danced our lives away, Moving to a music unique to our world. I peer into my face. So alive, so alive. Yet so quiet. I peer into my soul. And watch as we drank too much, And smoked too much, While we listened to music And danced our lives away; On down that one-way road That only led to bright lights. Bright headlights That were quickly extinguished, As were ours. I peer into my heart As my spirit fades, Dropping the rose to the ground. |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Philip Zemler - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
You, me'friend, touch me...I have been here--TOO MANY TIMES. Not likely to stop, is it? Sorry for the bitter...but this is..bitter..sweet....thank you. |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
MI, this reminds me of a piece I did 42 years ago... which is now lost to all time... you took this traveler on that journey, so in my eyes, this is very well done... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, then speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
||
|
Celeste Senior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 597 |
A very powerful ending. You portray the sadness of this so well. Really nice writing! To capture and live a moment is truly living |
||
|
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
A rose for you, my raccoony friend...  |
||
|
dragonpoe Senior Member
since 2000-11-12
Posts 608Palm Bay, Florida |
I am trully in awe of this piece. Very powerful, wonderfully crafted. |
||
|
Masked Intruder
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets |
Serenity- The could have beens hurt almost as much as the should have beens, but not often so much as what really happens. Thanks for being a sweet heart. Sunshine- One last journey is what I want when I finally die. I pray for that. (Just between us, the fortune teller told me I have a short life line, but it doesn't run in my family, so it will be something I do to myself that will cause my death. Kind of creepy, eh?) Dreamkeeper- I like your name. *grins* Powerful title. Glad you like the ending. I was hoping it turned out okay when I wrote it. I really didn't want her spirit to actually fade, because I don't truly believe a spirit can fade. Kind of fell into place though. Nan- One of these days I'll have to find the patience to learn how to do those graphics. Thank you, again. |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
and I, my friend, have felt the pull of past lives, so go figure... I don't think our spirits ever quit living...there's too much going on to allay any thought to the contrary... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, than speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
