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Open Poetry #10
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Nicole
Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835
Florida

0 posted 2000-11-11 03:45 AM


Sometimes, I think
I think too much
in jaded facets of
has-been tears
should be – should be
Should I have
laughed
a different tone, in that
one moment
(the one that matters most)
Perhaps – my shirt, too plain
the cleanly soft white
cotton, that I love so much
Or…
no
thinking back, it was
me
me being me
that just wasn’t quite right
a piece of puzzle matching
perfectly, except
for a missing notch

I cannot fight that

Wonder, though
I wonder
while reminiscing almosts
what happened
during those few minutes of the moment

lost

a future, marred
by quick glances back
to the warmth and sun
sand in my toes
the sound of waves, lapping
calling – promising
the island paradise I can never give

but through
tears – I can see
I can feel…

I am the island, undiscovered.


© Copyright 2000 Nicole Williams - All Rights Reserved
Masked Intruder
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 Tours
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231
Near golden sunsets
1 posted 2000-11-11 03:48 AM


Love the conclusion...wonderfully thought out!  
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
2 posted 2000-11-11 05:24 AM


I know this Nic - you write me so well sometimes... yanno?  

I think too much
in jaded facets of
has-been tears


Me.

C

Butterflies_dont_cry
Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733
Michigan
3 posted 2000-11-11 06:29 AM


Such deep delicate thoughts woven in a fine
display of honesty and grace~

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
4 posted 2000-11-11 06:29 AM


I am the island undiscovered.

Satiate what a great line for a great poem.
be well
Kethry


Why do yesterdays remain and todays pass by ...unnoticed?
Rex E. Alford

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
5 posted 2000-11-11 10:43 AM


This is incredible Nic! Please submit it to the main site. I loved it all..every line and especially the last one! Look at how long America sat here undiscovered! Your Columbus will come along, I promise! And he better be nice to you or he'll have the Poetic Wrath of your Passionate family to deal with!    
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
6 posted 2000-11-11 10:51 AM


Nikky, this speaks volumes...I was going to submit a line or two as my favorite, but as I read, they all struck my heart...so I would be redundant to repost your entire piece here when it does stand alone...

and I agree, please submit this to the main site...it is SO worthy...


Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...
I would rather be silent and write, then speak loudly and be bound.
KRJ



Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
7 posted 2000-11-11 06:02 PM


Sigh...

Nicole, it's not that you're thinking too much - it's what you're thinking of that's the problem...  One should be looking back when they have SO much to look forward to in their lives.  You KNOW that!!!

Great poem, btw,  


Michael

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
8 posted 2000-11-12 05:38 AM


I am the island, undiscovered.

Oh Satiate, a painfully honest poem, and that kind of honesty is always clouded by emotions. I know it too well. An excellent poem, loved every line but the last one really connected with me. Huge hug and look towards the future, I can tell it will hold many treasures for you.  

"an afixiation a fix on anything the line of life the limb of a tree
the hands of he and the promise that s/he is blessed among women".
Patti Smith

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
9 posted 2000-11-12 06:24 AM


The beauty in this is so precious and delicate, you have written a most beautiful piece here satiate...well done
Tracie~


Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe



Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
10 posted 2000-11-12 07:37 AM


Satiate~
Such a longing look back - tenderly done.

'I am the island, undiscovered.'

Perhaps the S.S. Minnow will land upon your shores
and bring this motley crew with a smile.


*Hugs* n' Smiles -
~*Marge*~



~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Nicole
Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835
Florida
11 posted 2000-11-13 03:17 PM


MI - thank you!

Chris - Us wackadoo's gotta stick together, yanno?  

BDC - What a lovely reply, thank you

Kethry - Thanks!

Sharon - You are such a sweetheart, and you say the funniest things.     Other girls look for their Romeo, that poor Nic...she's waiting for Columbus.  LOL  

Kari - What a wonderful thing to say, thank you much, dear.  

Michael - M'friend, you know me too well.   Thank you very much, and don't be such a stranger!!

Brian - Isn't that the truth, though?  All the heart knows, is what it feels...logic notwithstanding.  Thank you for such a thoughtful reply.

Tracie - Thank you!  

Marge - LOL!!  Maybe I'll just stay undiscovered a little while longer!   Dear, you always bring a smile!


ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
12 posted 2000-11-13 04:14 PM


Oh you can give it that's for sure and you should'nt remain undiscovered because you have the talent to get over those mistakes or wrong decisions in the past....because that's where they are and no matter what you do they are'nt going to change so there's no sense even thinking about them ...move on to another and build your love stronger!! and continue to write like this because it's very good!
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