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Open Poetry #10
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Undiscovered
| Open Poetry #10 |
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Undiscovered |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida 
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Sometimes, I think I think too much in jaded facets of has-been tears should be – should be Should I have laughed a different tone, in that one moment (the one that matters most) Perhaps – my shirt, too plain the cleanly soft white cotton, that I love so much Or… no thinking back, it was me me being me that just wasn’t quite right a piece of puzzle matching perfectly, except for a missing notch I cannot fight that Wonder, though I wonder while reminiscing almosts what happened during those few minutes of the moment lost a future, marred by quick glances back to the warmth and sun sand in my toes the sound of waves, lapping calling – promising the island paradise I can never give but through tears – I can see I can feel… I am the island, undiscovered. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Nicole Williams - All Rights Reserved | |||
Masked Intruder
Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231Near golden sunsets |
Love the conclusion...wonderfully thought out! |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
I know this Nic - you write me so well sometimes... yanno?  I think too much in jaded facets of has-been tears Me. C |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
Such deep delicate thoughts woven in a fine display of honesty and grace~ |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
I am the island undiscovered. Satiate what a great line for a great poem. be well Kethry Why do yesterdays remain and todays pass by ...unnoticed? Rex E. Alford |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
This is incredible Nic! Please submit it to the main site. I loved it all..every line and especially the last one! Look at how long America sat here undiscovered! Your Columbus will come along, I promise! And he better be nice to you or he'll have the Poetic Wrath of your Passionate family to deal with!  |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Nikky, this speaks volumes...I was going to submit a line or two as my favorite, but as I read, they all struck my heart...so I would be redundant to repost your entire piece here when it does stand alone... and I agree, please submit this to the main site...it is SO worthy... Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?... I would rather be silent and write, then speak loudly and be bound. KRJ |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Sigh... Nicole, it's not that you're thinking too much - it's what you're thinking of that's the problem... One should be looking back when they have SO much to look forward to in their lives. You KNOW that!!! Great poem, btw,  Michael |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
I am the island, undiscovered. Oh Satiate, a painfully honest poem, and that kind of honesty is always clouded by emotions. I know it too well. An excellent poem, loved every line but the last one really connected with me. Huge hug and look towards the future, I can tell it will hold many treasures for you. "an afixiation a fix on anything the line of life the limb of a tree the hands of he and the promise that s/he is blessed among women". Patti Smith |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
The beauty in this is so precious and delicate, you have written a most beautiful piece here satiate...well done Tracie~ Love is the life of the soul... It is the harmony of the universe |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Satiate~ Such a longing look back - tenderly done. 'I am the island, undiscovered.' Perhaps the S.S. Minnow will land upon your shores and bring this motley crew with a smile.  *Hugs* n' Smiles - ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
MI - thank you! Chris - Us wackadoo's gotta stick together, yanno? BDC - What a lovely reply, thank you Kethry - Thanks! Sharon - You are such a sweetheart, and you say the funniest things. Other girls look for their Romeo, that poor Nic...she's waiting for Columbus. LOL Kari - What a wonderful thing to say, thank you much, dear. Michael - M'friend, you know me too well. Thank you very much, and don't be such a stranger!!Brian - Isn't that the truth, though? All the heart knows, is what it feels...logic notwithstanding. Thank you for such a thoughtful reply. Tracie - Thank you! Marge - LOL!! Maybe I'll just stay undiscovered a little while longer! Dear, you always bring a smile! |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Oh you can give it that's for sure and you should'nt remain undiscovered because you have the talent to get over those mistakes or wrong decisions in the past....because that's where they are and no matter what you do they are'nt going to change so there's no sense even thinking about them ...move on to another and build your love stronger!! and continue to write like this because it's very good! |
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