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Open Poetry #10
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poetic_imperfection
Junior Member
since 2000-11-01
Posts 45


0 posted 2000-11-08 11:00 PM


I am a writer,
No shut eye at night.
Lost at sea,
By moonlight I write.
Countless thoughts rage in my mind,
These racing feelings I’ve confined.
Memories past, future dreams to be told,
Love, success, maybe someone to hold.
Waves are rough and time is near
GOD is my captain, the ears that hear.
Let me sleep Lord, put this mind to rest,
I’ve jumped through the loops, passed your test.
Exhausted and human I am
Reach down my Lord and take my hand.
This sea is wicked and cold,
My heart,my soul,still new, my body is getting old.
Guide me straight to the shore,
Let me live a good life Lord,
Just let me live once more.


© Copyright 2000 poetic_imperfection - All Rights Reserved
Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

1 posted 2000-11-08 11:16 PM


i dont see any imperfections here..another lovely poem..enjoyed very much..

                    ~Victoria~

Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925

2 posted 2000-11-08 11:18 PM


i definitly echo Victoria's words.  ron
poetic_imperfection
Junior Member
since 2000-11-01
Posts 45

3 posted 2000-11-08 11:26 PM


Thank you Victoria and Ron. I can take criticism though.. Im not sure how to make a smile on here yet but this is my smile.. ) Thank you both.
Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
4 posted 2000-11-08 11:36 PM


once again this is another terrific poem. your not alone with the thoughts raging at night there just happens to be times for all writers, the creativity flows,  I to seem to write more at night.
Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
5 posted 2000-11-08 11:37 PM


once again this is another terrific poem. your not alone with the thoughts raging at night there just happens to be times for all writers, the creativity flows,  I to seem to write more at night.
poetic_imperfection
Junior Member
since 2000-11-01
Posts 45

6 posted 2000-11-09 07:13 AM


Thank you Rosebud. I tend to have lots of sleepless nights and still no words flow. Just lost of tossing and turning.  
Take Care.
PLY

Kevin Dallas
New Member
since 2000-11-10
Posts 2

7 posted 2000-11-10 08:19 PM


This is so good, can't say how much it touched me, special meaning is understood.
poetic_imperfection
Junior Member
since 2000-11-01
Posts 45

8 posted 2000-11-12 08:06 PM


Thank you Kevin. One day I hope to begine my life. Thank you once more. GOD bless!

PLY

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
9 posted 2000-11-12 08:40 PM


p_i,

Welcome to Passions!!  This was nice writing here.  I like the rhyme scheme you used.  Good message.  

LW


Poetry should surprise by fine excess...it should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a remembrance. -J.Keats

Poeminister
Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862
Regina SK; Canada
10 posted 2000-11-12 08:58 PM


Hello.  Welcome!  I liked this poem much.  Nicely written.

"...no single sound too rude
Upon thy slumber shall intrude,
Our thoughts, our souls- O God above!
In every deed shall mingle, love."
--Ed

poetic_imperfection
Junior Member
since 2000-11-01
Posts 45

11 posted 2000-11-13 05:36 AM


L.W. & Poe....

Thank you both very much for your support. I dont have much time to write so these two are just ...throw togethers..if ya know what I mean.   

PLY


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