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Open Poetry #10
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Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925


0 posted 2000-11-01 11:55 PM


It was a cold November morning
The sun had just begun to rise
My hand reached out to touch her
But she was gone to my surprise

A note upon the table
Penned and teardrop stained
Left me so weak and shaken
As I read the words of pain

And she wrote
While the tears swelled in my eyes
“As you know,
I’ve been hurt so many times.
I’ve been burned,
By the flames of passion’s fire.
And it feels,
Like this flame is getting higher.
And my love,
For you is getting out of line.
So I’ll leave,
Don’t worry I’ll be fine.
‘cause my heart,
Can’t take being broken one more time.”

It’s been ten days since she left me,
I’ve probably walked a thousand miles.
And I’ll walk a thousand more,
Just so I can  see her tender smile.

On a thousand poles and fences,
In a thousand smoke filled bars,
I posted up this sign,
Written only for her heart.

In words I wrote,
The best I could describe,
It said,  “Desert Rose,
Please lay down your spines.
I can see,
The hurt that’s in your eyes.
And I know,
You’ve been told so many lies.
But I’m a man,
Who’s laying down his pride.
So Darling, please,
Don’t let this love just die.
Your love is WANTED,
Here by my side.


I was sitting in a bar room
Thinking there’s nothing more that I can do
Some good ole boys were singing
Something about feeling kind of blue


Then the noisy bar room,
Suddenly settled to a quiet hush.
The band just stopped playing,
As I felt your gentle touch.

I spun around to see you  there,
And there you held a sign.
It said, WANTED
“Is your love still alive?”

And I smiled
Swept you to my side
Then I said
As I looked into your eyes
“My Desert Rose,
I’ll never leave your side.
Can’t you see?
I’ve waited for you all my life.
You’re the one,
Who I’ll lay with every night.
From now on,
Everything will be all right.
‘Cause you’re WANTED
Until the day that I die.”




[This message has been edited by Ron K. Fox (edited 11-02-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Ronald Kenneth Fox - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-11-02 12:49 PM


yes theres a very cool song here...
excellent writing...perfect lyrical flow
very creative...

And she wrote
While the tears swelled in my eyes
“As you know,
I’ve been hurt so many times.
I’ve been burned,
By the flames of passion’s fire.
And it feels,
Like this flame is getting higher.
And my love,
For you is out of getting out of line.
So I’ll leave,
Don’t worry I’ll be fine.
‘cause my heart,
Can’t take being broken one more time.”
===================
why I can hear Martina McBride and Alan Jackson dueting from here  
cool write
take care
jm

Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
2 posted 2000-11-02 01:02 AM


You know, my friend......I have the sneakey suspicion that you really are a country songwriter!!  Take it from me, I play music for a living, and this one is a definite top-notch duet!!!  I like JM's choice of singers, or even Garth Brooks and Shania.
Good job, Ron.......need a keyboard player in your band?!!


Follow your dream!


Beki
Senior Member
since 1999-09-15
Posts 1569
Newport Beach, CA, USA
3 posted 2000-11-02 01:28 AM


definitely a lyric    I am a personal assistant to a country singer, songwriter, producer etc (who opened for Garth in Central Park, Sunny  )and I have heard a million of 'em, read a millionmore wanna be's and this one with just a little work could be a very successful country song  )
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

4 posted 2000-11-02 02:10 AM


yes, it is a song, Ron...and this is so touching. You are developing quite a rhythm here...lol...now, what's the name of that bar again?  I've got the next round.
juliet_2u
Senior Member
since 2000-07-23
Posts 1125
North Carolina
5 posted 2000-11-02 09:18 AM


Oh yeah Ron I hear a sweet song in this. Just great. Keepem comin.
Juls

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
6 posted 2000-11-02 09:26 AM


Hey RON!! very lyrical story you're telling here and I like the movement.....love the title!! Get out the old acoustic or sit down to the old ninety eights and pull out a melody to embrace this one
Ah....who was playin in that band??

...take care...ethome

Love the storyline by the way!!

Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925

7 posted 2000-11-02 09:49 AM


Well thanks everyone...Thanks JM for the kind response

Sunny,  I'm not a country singer...can't even play an empty bottle...but I do like writing lyrics...never made a penny doing it though

Beki...well talk to your people...I need a job!...well I have one with lousy pay...

Thanks for the kind response

Thank you Serenity...meet you for a shot at the Low Down Heart saloon

Thanks Juls...I sure will try

Ethome...I think Hank Williams Jr is coming over to waych the football game...not his style but he may have an idea LOL..thanks for stopping by



Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
8 posted 2000-11-02 10:06 AM


take this and stomp some music into it and we will all have known you when....
Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

9 posted 2000-11-02 10:13 AM


It's been years since I plucked a guitar, but I tell you what, I think this would make a great song, a few repetitions and you have it., it's all there, it's great. Pursue it!

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses
over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey.""
Laurie Lee

Kathleen



hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
10 posted 2000-11-02 11:54 AM


I simply love it.....great poem to put to music. I'm a sucker for those ole country songs especially when they have a happy ending
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