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Open Poetry #10
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Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925


0 posted 2000-10-29 11:00 AM


I been reading a lot of heartbreak poems by you girls who've been done wrong. taking things from your perspective I had this running through my head, so here goes, for all you girls and gals.

Blue skies and sunny days
Fresh picked flowers for my vase
A picket fence of white
A house up on the hill
You promised me blue skies
Well, I’m waiting still.

Brown and crinkled are the flowers that have died
Sitting on this dusty trailer window sill.
These red crying eyes are running out of tears,
It’s hard to swallow this bitter tasting pill.

I’m left here in this silver tin can, day after day,
Just listening to this old crackling radio.
Even in the night, when you’re laying here next to me
In the blackness I feel so damn alone.
Where’s my blue?

Blue skies and sunny days,
Blue skies and so much more.
The only blue I see,
Is the back
Of your faded jeans
Watching them walking out the door.

That truck of yours gets more mileage from you than me
To you I’ve just become an old worn tire
There’s some other wheel you’re spinning, yes, its plain to see,
I can see that look, it’s in your eyes.

You’re drinking buddies don’t come ‘round here no more
So I can guess I know where you’re spending time.
Is she hearing the same old lies that you once told me?
Is she seeing the promise of  my blue skies?
Where’s my blue?

You promised me blue skies,I heard you say,
Blue skies and sunny days
It’s hard to see
The powder blue
When your skies
Are filled with clouds of gray.

Well, you came home drunk again late last night
I could smell her cheap perfume in your hair,
I packed what little I have left that belongs to me
I just don’t have the strength to even care.

I’m in your truck you loved so much more than me,
Its running fine with this old worn tire,
Those storm clouds are parting just in time,
Up ahead I see those sunny skies.
There’s my blue.

< !signature-->

Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox




[This message has been edited by Ron K. Fox (edited 10-29-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Ronald Kenneth Fox - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2000-10-29 11:10 AM


Sounds like two songs...the original, and a sequel...

and it sounds like you've a large heart...to take into mind what women go through...

good job, Mr. Ron!


Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ



Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
2 posted 2000-10-29 11:12 AM


"Even in the night, when you’re laying here next to me
In the blackness I feel so damn alone."

"That truck of yours gets more mileage from you than me"

Most definately a country song flavour to this wonderful tale Ron ... really well done!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
3 posted 2000-10-29 11:14 AM


RonK~ from a guy's pen, you didn't do too bad   Kidding.....this is fun and yep, I'm hearing a song in there........ -SEA
BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
4 posted 2000-10-29 11:15 AM


Definitely a country flavor Ron, with just a little bit of some Jeff Foxworthy thrown in... Great poem, now let's get on a CD.... Bonnie
peppermint35
Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106
Texas, USA
5 posted 2000-10-29 11:26 AM


Wonderful Ron!!!  You don't just listen; you really hear!!!

Definitely a country song; and I love the ending!!!

Peppermint
Life is a Wheel

Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925

6 posted 2000-10-29 11:37 AM


thanks all...I listen well...and if you can sing it...let's do it...I could use some cash...lol
Rainydays
Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324

7 posted 2000-10-29 11:54 AM


Ron, a wonderful effort you've given. Clever, sardonic, and sensitive (in a honky tonk kind of way!)  Thanks, I enjoyed this.

Rainydays

Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
8 posted 2000-10-29 12:09 PM


All women like a man who sees and really understands, so this gets my vote!!! It does have a country song feel to it.....I can almost hear the melody.  
Great job on this great poem!


Follow your dream!


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

9 posted 2000-10-29 04:15 PM


country blues... ya cant do better than that.
this is very cool ..
you did a great job with both the theme
and the repetion of verse
youve pen a lyric of harmony..
and a melody to the ladies poetic eyes and ears..
very nice
take care
jm

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
10 posted 2000-10-29 05:10 PM


A wealth of possibilities here, Ron...all the ingredients to sing country, down to the bluejeans and trailer. Very creative...
brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
11 posted 2000-10-29 05:35 PM


Far too good for a country song... this can only be poetry... wonderfully written Ron, sounds more like the blues the me anyway get out the slide guitar...kidding. seriously, excellent poem.

"an afixiation a fix on anything the line of life the limb of a tree
the hands of he and the promise that s/he is blessed among women".
Patti Smith

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
12 posted 2000-10-29 05:42 PM


Ron, this is great. Have you signed Dena Carter yet? Sounds like her kinda stuff!
Dee


I wish you every happiness and pray you'll always have the best of the good things in life. a brand

Ron K. Fox
Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925

13 posted 2000-10-29 07:01 PM


Thanks for the replies, but i haven't signed anyone yet, waiting for the best offer lol...yeah right...you all come back now, hear.

Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox

AniKay83
Member
since 2000-06-28
Posts 388
Missing Since 1999
14 posted 2000-10-29 08:49 PM


Hmmmmm....maybe country, maybe Alanis Morisette? Maybe you should break up with your boyfriend? lol.. really, this is great. It's so wonderful to see you pay attention to women's woes. I love a romantic!

Much love all,
Krissie

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