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Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware

0 posted 2000-10-17 05:58 PM



A Less Than Perfect Fall Day

The sun isn't shining
There are no fluffy white clouds in the blue
It's not a day you'd call brisk
A light rain falls
From an overcast sky
Colored leaves are few
My street, soon to be awash
With yellow waves of maple
Leaves skittering down the avenue
Is still but a row of green trees
Highlighted with some deep crimson

Yet it somehow seems fitting
You're not here
I lack your hand to hold
My fingers grow numb
The absence of your voice
Plays like rock at a Mettalica concert
My ears should be hearing you
Soft on my drums like Debussy
Melodic as Mozart
Stimulating as Shostakovitch

My eyes water from the strain
Of trying to see your smile
And my leg twitches
Wanting to walk with you

My lips parched
Longing for the moisture
Of your kiss
And all I can smell
Is the exhaust of passing cars

Truly - a less than perfect
Fall Day


~You have to have a dream so you can get up in the morning.

~ Billy Wilder

© Copyright 2000 Wilfred Yeats - All Rights Reserved
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

1 posted 2000-10-17 06:05 PM


Truly a beautiful poem Wilfred   enjoyed it muchly.

Maree

"If my words could blanket the skies
and fill every corner and crevice of
this earth, still this won't be enough"
"Maree Russo"

Poet's Sister
Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 80
North Carolina
2 posted 2000-10-17 08:10 PM


Less Than Perfect Fall Day = Nearly Perfect Poem!
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
3 posted 2000-10-17 08:18 PM


Now THIS is romantic writing. A season's just a season without a reason.....
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

4 posted 2000-10-17 08:56 PM


Less than perfect day, but another perfect piece of writing you present Wilfred.  Well done Bill.
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2000-10-17 09:05 PM


Bill--Yup--when you're with someone special then everything is beautiful, and when you're missing them, all seems gray...you've expressed this well!
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

6 posted 2000-10-17 09:11 PM


A very befitting poem on such a dreary day.
Well done Wilfred.  *s*

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
7 posted 2000-10-17 09:38 PM


A less than perfect fall day
truly painted with a perfect brush!

Corinne

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
8 posted 2000-10-17 09:42 PM


Mr. Yeats...does my return to the Forums erase the sadness of this fall day?



and if that gave you a chuckle, then I did my job...

and your poem is...wonderful



Karilea
If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ



Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
9 posted 2000-10-18 12:40 PM


Maree- TY - (adopting JM's shorthand~G~)
I really appreciate your response

Poet's Sister-
TY- I hope I never achieve perfection - I'll have nothing to strive for - thanks again~S~

'deer
TY -you're too kind - but I love it ~S~

Gentle Spirit-
TY -Why do I have the feeling I know you?
Thank you so much

Martie-
TY it was a gray day in reality as well - but it only takes a day's absense - to create the feeling

Gentle Spirit-
TY again - I am twice blessed ~S~

Corinne-
I'm getting the message -many of my readers are sending me a message about the type of poems they prefer ~G~ -I'll try and keep this brush clean and soft~G~

Karilea-
TY - yes! you were truly missed - and even if it is only indoors - it is sunshine here now ~S~

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
10 posted 2000-10-18 01:18 PM


I can only say its not as beautiful here...without my special someone...and you said it so much better than I ever could
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
11 posted 2000-10-19 07:34 PM


I've had some days like this Wilfred...I hope the days become perfect, for you, and for me too.
Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
12 posted 2000-10-20 06:41 AM


Paula - Passing Shadows -
It was really a glum day when I wrote this - the absense of my loved one only exacerbated it. Thank you - I too pray for change  

lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
13 posted 2000-10-20 03:55 PM


Well Bill, hay I see you've got some taste. I think I'll go put on some Mozart right now. And yes Bill, it's a good good write.

dale



Writing isn't just something I do, it's something I am.
To write of feelings that touch all hearts in some manner is my delight.
-Marge Tindal

Elizabeth
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871
Minnesota
14 posted 2000-10-20 03:59 PM


Ouch   Well, it sure sounded less than perfect...well described.

Elizabeth


Something sweet, something sort of grandish, sweeps my soul when thou art near...
hedeservesbetter@hotmail.com


JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
15 posted 2000-10-20 05:19 PM


Wilfred you have expressed your emotions well..James
Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
16 posted 2000-10-20 10:14 PM


Dale-
yep - Mozart, Bach, Satie, Pachobel - WCHandy - LeGrande and Weill - to name a few~G~
Thanks  

Elizabeth-
It only hurts when I laugh   thanks

JML- Thank you - I try~S~

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
17 posted 2000-10-20 10:17 PM


Oh Wil sadly your emotions penned
~HUGS~
Tracie~


Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe



Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

18 posted 2000-10-20 10:24 PM


You've described it perfectly. Very well written and very touching.

Denise

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
19 posted 2000-10-20 11:48 PM


Tracie-
all poets have sad moments - -I'll bet you do too ~S~ thank you

Denise-
I'm glad you found value - thank you  

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