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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2000-10-02 10:29 AM


A simple ravage of the self,
a funnel cloud in distant thoughts,
rage of age where peace should dwell,
agony--discovered hell,
my soul awander, where no thing ought.

I did this to myself.

Does fire have a moments peace?
My yearning seems to know no bounds.
an ointment made of loving grace--
kisses of a soothing balm,
ever taunting, out of reach,
a-dread, alarmed, of trumpet's sound.

I condemned myself to hell,
no fortitude with which to fight--
can rest be found among the flames?
How to heal, while I fry...
transforming screams of agony
the dreadful dirge, to psalm of peace?

I need to undo this myself.

© Copyright 2000 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
1 posted 2000-10-02 10:34 AM



There seems to be a lot of conflict here, knowing that you did it to yourself, and also knowing that you must undo it yourself.
      Very nicely written, and thought-provoking!


Today is a gift....
That is why they call it
'the Present'!



Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
2 posted 2000-10-02 10:55 AM


it hurts a tad... but... being blackened makes you spicy!  in the end...

when I'm burning myself I always find a dose of Squirell Nut Zipper's "Hell" takes out the sting -- I mean -- if you're gonna burn might as well do it in a conga line...

In the afterlife
you could be headed for the serious strife
now you make the scene all day
but tomorrow the'll be hell to pay

beauty
talent
fame
fortune
refinement of skill and grace
but all the things
you try to hide
will be revealed on the other side...

line forms here!!  

(((((serenity))))))

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

3 posted 2000-10-02 11:38 AM


I did this to myself.

Does fire have a moments peace?
My yearning seems to know no bounds.
an ointment made of loving grace--
kisses of a soothing balm,
ever taunting, out of reach,
a-dread, alarmed, of trumpet's sound.

I condemned myself to hell,
no fortitude with which to fight--
can rest be found among the flames?
How to heal, while I fry...
transforming screams of agony
the dreadful dirge, to psalm of peace?

I need to undo this myself.

==========================
*sitting here bawling* ...(blame it on hormones) ..
HOW MANY times have we written each other a mirror now...
this one is like a mirror in a fun house ..
makes us look fatter than we are...but still we see oursleves...YA KNOW?????
you have word for word written the reality i woke up with this morning...slept with all weekend for that matter ...(you know)
jeeeze me twin ...how did we get to here..
and I know your "here" and mine are not the exact same situations but  yea...the pain is the same ...and Im tired of it..
and the guilt and the anger and and and ..
yea ...so i keep telling my self...
time to get a life....time to get real ..
live in reality... but REALITY SUCKS baby ...
yea...you know ...
makes me wanna just ...you know ...
thank god for poetry and poets and mirrors
thank god for my cd player ...and denial.
for friends who know....quiet comfort ...
me loves ya..MUCHLY...
sing it Jackson...

THE LATE SHOW

Everyone I've ever known has wished me well
Anyway that's how it seems, it's hard to tell
Maybe people only ask you how you're doin'
'Cause that's easier than letting on how little they can care
But when you know that you've got a real friend somewhere
Suddenly all the others are so much easier to bear

Now to see things clear, it's hard enough I know
While you're waiting for reality to show
Without dreaming of the perfect love and holding it so far above
If you stumbled on to someone real, you'd never know

(You'd never know)
You could be with somebody who is lonely too
(Sometimes it doesn't show)
He might be trying to get across to you
(Words can be so slow)
When your own emptiness is all that's getting through
There comes a point when you're not sure why you're still talking
I passed that point long ago

(Long ago)
Now I'm so tired of all this circling
And all these glimpses of the end
(You know it's useless to pretend)
That's all the voices say:
"You'll go right on circling
Until you've found some kind of friend"

Well I saw you through the laughter and the noise
You were talking with the soldiers and the boys
While they scuffled for your weary smile
I thought of all the empty miles
And the years I've spent looking for your eyes

(Looking for your eyes)
Now I'm sitting here wondering what to say
(That you might recognize)
Afraid that all these words might scare you away
(And break through the disguise)
No one ever talks about their feelings anyway
Without dressing them in dreams and laughter
I guess it's just too painful otherwise

Look, it's like you're standing in the window
Of a house nobody lives in
And I'm sitting in a car across the way
(Let's just say)
It's an early model Chevrolet
(Let's just say)
It's a warm and windy day

You go and pack your sorrow
Trash man comes tomorrow
Leave it at the curb and we'll just roll away

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2000-10-02 11:45 AM


and this one....

FARTHER ON
Jackson Browne

In my early years I hid my tears
And passed my days alone
Adrift on an ocean of loneliness
My dreams like nets were thrown
To catch the love that I'd heard of
In books and films and songs
Now there's a world of illusion and fantasy
In the place where the real world belongs

Now I look for the beauty in songs

To fill my head and lead me on
Though my dreams have come up torn and empty
As many times as love has come and gone

To those gentle ones my memory runs
To the laughter we shared at the meals
I filled their kitchens and living rooms
With my schemes and my broken wheels
It was never clear how far or near
The gates to my citadel lay
They we're cutting from stone some dreams of their own
But they listened to mine anyway

I'm not sure what I'm trying to say

It could be I've lost my way
Though I keep a watch over the distance
Heaven's no closer than it was yesterday
And the angels are older
They know not to wait up for the sun
They look over my shoulder
At the maps and the drawings of the journey I've begun

Now the distance leads me farther on
Though the reasons I once had are gone
I keep thinking I'll find what I'm looking for
In the sand beneath the dawn
But the angels are older
They can see that the sun's setting fast
They look over my shoulder
At the vision of paradise
Contained in the light of the past

And they lay down behind me
To sleep beside the road 'til the morning has come
Where they know they will find me
With my maps and my faith in the distance

Moving farther on
====================

thank you jackson...
ok baby..im done now (done in) ..winkie winkie*

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
5 posted 2000-10-02 06:00 PM


How much does a plate of fried serenity steak go for these days? What time is dinner?? I'll bring the whine!

I'm not poking fun at ya, serenity, just trying to lift the gloom with a smile  

One thing about fried serenity....it's guaranteed to be tender, I'm sure  

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

6 posted 2000-10-02 07:31 PM


Thanks to the Reb, for the generous hug and understanding.

JM---shame on you, I'm down with bronchitis and sore throat and you made me laugh so hard I choked on my soup.

Sunny1, actually no, no conflicts here, just a bummer of a realization...

and Balladeer, worry not, just came out gloomier that it really is...I actually had a great weekend, forgot I was old...well, older, and today was a rude reminder...lol

But thanks to all...I appreciate your comments  much.  (((((((forum)))))))))

Tears_of_Grace
Member
since 2000-07-05
Posts 50

7 posted 2000-10-02 10:17 PM


Knowing that we do things like this to ourselves doesn't make it any easier to fix, in fact if it were someone else doing it we could just "remove" them..know what I mean?? I think you do from the flow of this one. WOW!
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