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Open Poetry #7
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sea_of_okc
Senior Member
since 1999-06-15
Posts 568
Oklahoma City, OK, USA

0 posted 2000-06-05 07:14 PM


Lost and alone I silently shout
Searching all over but no one's about
A landscape so black that I cannot see
I believe I may wander throughout eternity

Bleak and barren with no sign of hope
Not sure how long I'll be able to cope
I can't help but think that nobody cares
I'm stuck in this place with naught by my fears

A wall on my left and one to my right
A tumble of rocks in the darkness of night
I trudge on through this infernal maze
Don't know where I am, just lost in the haze

Without meaning or purpose walls have been built
The ground is a mixture of ashes and silt
Finally a door, so I enter the room
Silent and empty and cold as a tomb

I sit to reflect and tears fill my eyes
A gut-wrenching sob as I realize
This hopelessly empty, barren, black hole
This landscape I'm in, my very own soul...



 Steven Seaman
To thine own self be true...



© Copyright 2000 Steven Thomas Seaman - All Rights Reserved
Tennessee Angel
Senior Member
since 2000-06-03
Posts 661
Tennessee
1 posted 2000-06-05 07:16 PM


Oooo...kinda sent chills down my spine there.  I loved how desciptive it was!  Nice work!

 "That man has shown himself great who has never grieved in evil days and never bewailed his destiny." --Seneca

amazon_lover
Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491
Dublin,Ireland
2 posted 2000-06-05 07:20 PM


Hi SOK,
It's a bad situation. I feel exactly the same way empty walls and minds moving around,life is a misery . Just live untl you find better times.

Sincerely
A_L

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
3 posted 2000-06-05 07:24 PM


Sea,

What powerful writing and images you conjure up in your poem.  Wow....fabulous writing.  I hope you realize that you are never truly alone.  You may be surprised at just how many people care about you.  Hang in there...there will be sunshine one day.  

Lone Wolf


 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2000-06-06 11:08 AM


dark and powerful imagery here Sea,
both visual and emotional
excellent rhyme flow as well
liked the landscape metaphor too
you have expressed these emotions
painfully well.
we do build up walls of protection around us
when we've been hurt.
hopefuly we heal in time and dont linger too long in the isolation
I believe our writing helps us to heal.
take care, jm

 I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - that I know too much
I can't relate and that's a problem
I'm feeling ...
If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
cuz there's a little bit of something me...
In everything in you.
~MB20~

"What the caterpillar calls the end ...
The world calls a butterfly"
~Lao Tze Tao~
~Butterflies are meant to be free~


amazon_lover
Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491
Dublin,Ireland
5 posted 2000-06-06 11:13 AM


Hi Sea
Isolation is what we've created in ourself. World is beautiful around us and enjoy it. Step up out of your prison and reach with your soul to heavens above.

Sincerely
A_L

wayoutwalt
Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)
6 posted 2000-06-06 11:33 AM


hey sea!!! wavin at sea..long time no sea..hehe anyways very good poem as usual sea when sea cries its a salty sea o man i better stop it sea yeah sea what are yuh a copper sea yeah yeah
poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646
Arkansas
7 posted 2000-06-06 11:53 AM


Hey Sea of OKC....this one is quite chilling to say the least.  You painted some powerful dark imagery there.  I could see you in that tomb man...
I love how you wrapped this thing up at the end too.  You certainly have a way with words from within.  Keep writing, if you're really needing to vent.  Soooo glad to see you back.  Have I told you that enough yet??  

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
8 posted 2000-06-06 11:56 AM


Sea, this was quite powerful, and very lonely...vivid imagery...well done!

 Sunshine

~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
Helen Keller ~~~


Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
9 posted 2000-06-06 02:23 PM


sea~
this one just SCREAMED out to me
and i had to read it twice. wow!
such vivid imagery and intense emotion
you have woven into this one. if this
is "real life" i hope you
know you are not alone.
and if it isn't well you convey the
message and feelings extremely well. at
any rate awesome piece of poetry.
take care and best wishes.
amy  


 "Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends."

"Fate exists but it can only take you so far,
Because once you're there
It's up to you to make it happen."




sea_of_okc
Senior Member
since 1999-06-15
Posts 568
Oklahoma City, OK, USA
10 posted 2000-06-06 05:09 PM


Thank you all for your comments and support    I guess we all write from our experiences but before you worry too much about me be assured I have already been thru the darkness and emerged on the other side, just did not write about it until now. There were a series of 'endings' in my life recently but now I am looking forward to new beginnings.

Femme - you can never tell me enough

Walt - very nice to see you again too

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