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Passions in Poetry

My First poem (challenge) Teatime War

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Blondie
Member
since 08-06-99
Posts 307
Ohio


0 posted 06-01-2000 04:48 PM       View Profile for Blondie   Email Blondie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Blondie


The Teatime War

A spinster and her closest friend                                      
Her name unknown to me,
Confided truths with the utmost trust
Upon their noontime tea,
Their cheeks they had grown sallow
Their locks a deadened grey,
Muscles sagged abundantly
Upon that fine spring day,
Now it may be due to season
Or a smell upon the air,
That wakened some nostalgia
The facts are quite unclear.
But alas they chatted secretly
Of days so long ago,
When eyes were bright and cheeks aflush
With that youthful sort of glow,

I know not why they argued
As both seemed right to me,
But alas they could not compromise
Nor were they willing to concede.
It seems the subject that on hand
Aroused the long debate,
Was something of a paradox
Which to all of us relates,
Love was the word that waged the war
Between the two old dears,
They spilled their treasures openly
And sniffled back their tears,
“You see,” said she named Ester
“I knew not love could die,
I thought it burned eternally”
She cackled ‘neath the sky.

“Beneath a waxing moon one night
A summer long ago,
A romance never meant to be
Began slowly to unfold,
I met him once, that’s all it took
To bind my heart to his,
Our eyes did meet, our hands did touch
We sealed it with a kiss,
The balmy night enfolded us
The stars watched from above,
The moon did glow romantically
That’s how we fell in love,
Within his arms I found myself
I felt that I might swoon,

But completely unbeknownst to me
Twas’ the dark side of the moon,
We spent out days together
Too few they do seem now,
Until at last it ended
I can’t admit to knowing how,
It was then that I did realize
In the dark hours this truth I gained,
A sourest lesson I ever learned
A waxing moon must wane.”
“Tsk. Tsk.” said she that listened close
“I hate to disagree,
But I find I have a problem
With your love philosophy,
It’s something there inside us
Once ignited it’s set free,
You can never take it back
It lives eternally,
I do not agree that love can die
Here’s a story of my own,
You’ll see once I have shared it
I’ll drive my point right home...”
“We grew up along the coast
We courted near the sea,
It was a match designed in heaven
We were happy, him and me,
The summer we had set the date
His eyes would never see,
Oh cruelest fate, you dealt the blow
That took my love from me,
He transcended up to heaven
But within his heart was mine,
Love was made to last forever
To forsake it is a crime.”

Now the argument got heated
Each defending their own side,
Of love and hate and broken hearts
Between their words they cried,
The debate went on ‘till midnight
But the war was not yet done,
They disagreed throughout their lives
At teatime ‘neath the sun,
One dear, she died that summer
Her friend, the following one,
But they never reached agreement
Even when their day had come,
Now some may choose one side
While others disagree
Many can’t decide
But the answers clear to me,
To each his own, think what you will
But I feel that I must say,
Wouldn’t you rather live your life
Than wile it away?

© Melissa Rose
© Copyright 2000 Melissa - All Rights Reserved
Jana Tovey
Member
since 05-30-2000
Posts 257
USA


1 posted 06-01-2000 07:42 PM       View Profile for Jana Tovey   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jana Tovey

Poor old dears, indeed.  What a lovely, well thought out composition.  I can just picture them in the garden, having their disagreement.  You brought them both to life.
Elizabeth
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Member Rara Avis
since 06-07-99
Posts 7296
America the beautiful


2 posted 06-01-2000 07:48 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

With a start as great at this, Blondie, you can only become greater!

Elizabeth


 "He have his goodness now. God forbid I take it from him!"
-The Crucible

Blondie
Member
since 08-06-99
Posts 307
Ohio


3 posted 06-01-2000 08:37 PM       View Profile for Blondie   Email Blondie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Blondie

Thank you guys so much...this is actually my best poem, I think, that I have written and sadly enough it was my first  
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 04-30-2000
Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada


4 posted 06-01-2000 09:20 PM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

This was wonderful Blondie!  I loved the morale of your story.  How long ago did you write this???  Your imagery and flow are superb ... I can still see these little ladies arguing it out under the sun!  

Lovely first poem, challenge met ... really terrific!

Best wishes,
/Kit

[This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (edited 06-01-2000).]
Blondie
Member
since 08-06-99
Posts 307
Ohio


5 posted 06-01-2000 09:52 PM       View Profile for Blondie   Email Blondie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Blondie

I just started writing poetry about 1 and 1/2 ago...this was my first one I ever wrote.  Took me about 3 months to finally complete and put together...
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