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Open Poetry #7
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Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095


0 posted 2000-06-01 10:41 AM



Alone of You


Alone of you
    I am the thorn
       behind the rose
     you have touched me
          and bled from me
       but the rose
         has only caressed you
                 with its beauty,
              its charm,
            with the corners
          of its mouth turned
               up, wide
    it has not kissed
      your skin
as I have.


Dark Angel
2/6/00



 Je t'aime plus qu'hier et moins que demain."
I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow
(unkown)



© Copyright 2000 Dark Angel - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2000-06-01 11:49 AM


This is very interesting...I see a person who has not shown everything but hides behind bitter words after the love is gone.  I am probably off base.  But, I like this very much. Well done, Dark Angel.
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
2 posted 2000-06-01 12:03 PM


Interesting, I get a different feel from it than Sunshine. I think it's about infidelity. Good poem, my friend.  
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

3 posted 2000-06-01 05:34 PM


Interesting, Sunshine and Sharon   You both are sort of on the right track.   Glad you enjoyed.  

 Je t'aime plus qu'hier et moins que demain."
I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow
(unkown)



brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
4 posted 2000-06-01 06:37 PM


every rose has its thorn. God that sounded cliched.
A wonderful poem, I really loved the following piece, beautifully written.

but the rose
         has only caressed you
                 with its beauty,
              its charm,
            with the corners
          of its mouth turned
               up, wide
    it has not kissed
      your skin
as I have.



 ------------------------
"I've been too honest with myself I should have lied like everybody else"-Richey Edwards

"Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time".

Baltimore Grotto

"Libraries gave us power
Then work came and made us free
What price now for a shallow piece of dignity"
Nicky Wire, A design for Life.

manic street preachers

La Tristesse Durera (Scream to a Sigh)
"Life has been unfaithful And it all promised so so much
I am a relic I am just a petrified cry Wheeled out once a year, a cenotaph souvenir
The applause nails down my silence
La tristesse durera
Scream to a sigh, to a sigh
I see liberals I am just a fashion accessory
People send postcards
And they all hope I'm feeling well I retreat into self-pity, it's so easy Where they patronise my misery
La tristesse durera
Scream to a sigh, to a sigh
I sold my medal
It paid a bill
It sells at market stalls Parades Milan catwalks
The sadness will never go Will never go away
Baby it's here to stay


Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
5 posted 2000-06-01 06:43 PM


I have to agree with Poet deVine here....sounds like infidelity for sure.  Either that or someone has left you for another maybe?  One who is not all that she seems perhaps....just a stab at the meaning.  Nice writing, DA.  

LW


 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
6 posted 2000-06-01 07:22 PM


Could mean a number of things, now you've got my mind working.But no matter, I loved this metaphor, and it is a lovely piece.
(Could be a love triangle, the thorn being the one with substance, and the rose having only beauty, or the thorn could be the wife and the rose the lover, or vice versa.)
So which is it? Or none of the above?
Liz

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

7 posted 2000-06-01 07:26 PM


Maree...

this is the most beautiful thing you have ever written, definitely my favourite.

Such a chill though...and there is envy here. I have a feeling Lizzy is right with the triangle thing - is that your focus?

K

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

8 posted 2000-06-01 08:40 PM


Elizabeth, yes a love triangle it is indeed, the rose and the thorn are not each others lover, the thorn is the lover of the one spoken of(Alone of you) the rose a possible lover, a threat to the thorn, and the thorn is telliing  the lover, that the rose is showing just its beauty, it has only careesed her with its beauty and I the thorn have kissed my lovers skin and my lover has touched me and bled from me. In other words I guess is ... "lover you KNOW me"

Thanks Elizabeth, hopefully I've helped you understand what goes through this head of mine  

Soul-Sis, the answer to your question is as above    Envy you ask?...nope more like Jealousy!  
Glad this is your favourite.
Thanks  for your lovely reply hon.

Brian, thank you so much glad you enjoyed it.  

Lonewolf, thanks hon, do appreciate your comments.  




 Je t'aime plus qu'hier et moins que demain."
I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow
(unkown)



Aimster
Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC
9 posted 2000-06-01 08:58 PM


this piece left me with lots of thoughts going on in my head. it is quite interesting and full of powerful intense images! thanks so much for sharing

amy  

 
"Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends."


Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
10 posted 2000-06-01 11:13 PM


I am the thorn, loved this darkangel so much meaning in so few words. Came across very well.
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
11 posted 2000-06-01 11:43 PM


The title is captivating and the poem also...the uncertainty of meaning adds to its flavor.  Well done!
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
12 posted 2000-06-07 09:56 PM


DA, you left me totally speechless! Another favorite! This is breathtaking!!!
Rodney Belcher
Member
since 2000-06-06
Posts 227
Taylor, Michigan
13 posted 2000-06-07 11:00 PM


I too applaud the depth of meaning with the frugality of words...I also sensed a deeper feeling and the realness of the thorn when most give attention to the bloom...an interesting analogy.

[This message has been edited by Rodney Belcher (edited 06-08-2000).]

Rhavin
Junior Member
since 2000-05-27
Posts 28

14 posted 2000-06-07 11:09 PM


My favorite thing about this poem was the meaning of it.  I too loved it very much!
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

15 posted 2000-06-08 05:49 PM


Amy, thanks so much for reading  

Rosebud, glad you liked it.  

Thanks so much Martie  

Thanks so much Angel girrrl   glad you liked.  

Rodney, yes the bloom always captures the attention, but the bloom also dies, even right before your eyes. Thanks for your lovely reply.  

Thanks Rhavin, so glad you enjoyed it.  

 Je t'aime plus qu'hier et moins que demain."
I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow
(unkown)



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