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Open Poetry #7
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brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland

0 posted 2000-05-27 06:50 AM


Cradling youth in my trolley cage,
I crawled in among the bags
and boxes with my new play thing.
I sat absorbing drama in the aisles,
with exhibits of food displayed for sedation.
I resolved the boredom of breakfast cereal
with another cheap plastic toy
wrapped to stop me from choking.
All the lampposts blurred into memory,
in this suburbia nothing seemed real.

At night I clung to them, my toys,
as defence against the nightmares.
I sold them into unaware prostitution,
satisfying my darkest desires.
They covered me with cold water kisses
while I teethed in adolescence.
I swore my soul to silence,
pretending false virtue and purity.
They were wide-eyed and dead,
loyal without whispers of mutiny.

Finally I placed them to rest, locked away
existing only as prisoners of my mind.
In the confines of my Kindergarden
I shed baby skin, as every breath
draws me closer to stillness.
The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality.
My Lego cocoon crumbles in age,  
time strips away, evolving a new essence of me.  
My childhood burns in the ashes of yesterday.




 ------------------------
"Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? "
Douglas Adams.

"Here chewing your tail is joy"

Richey Edwards

"Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time".

Baltimore Grotto

"Do not listen to a word I say
Just listen to what I can keep silent"

Nicky Wire


© Copyright 2000 brian madden - All Rights Reserved
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464
Somewhere near the Rainbow
1 posted 2000-05-27 09:02 AM


Wow, this poem is fabulous, your images are grand. What an evolution you created here, I love it great job!  
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
2 posted 2000-05-27 09:12 AM


Excellent poem!!! I think you should submit this to a contest or a magazine..  
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
3 posted 2000-05-27 09:21 AM


"The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality."

Incredible imagery Brian!  This was fantasic ... enjoyed it tremendously!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
4 posted 2000-05-27 10:57 AM


This is excellent, brian... interestingly enough - I've been working on one that does just the opposite - regresses us from adulthood back to childhood.... hehe... stay tuned...

You've got some wonderful lines here... I can't even pick what I like best.. perhaps "teething in adolescence"... Good read, my friend...

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
5 posted 2000-05-28 05:10 AM



Lost dreamer - thank you for your lovely reply, glad you enjoyed the poem.

Poet deVine, thank you for your suggestion and your wonderful comment, I might give it a try.

Kit- I think I managed to squeeze most of my favourite images into the poem,
but I think that line is also one of my favourites,
just because of the whole Eden reference and the fact that we have an orchard at home.
Glad you enjoyed the poem, thank you for your kind words.

Nan, I look forward to reading your poem on regressing to childhood.
I miss the innocence of childhood but I would never like to return to being a child,
if only I could freeze frame my life at this point…sigh.  
thank you for your wonderful reply








 ------------------------
"Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? "
Douglas Adams.

"Here chewing your tail is joy"

Richey Edwards

"Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time".

Baltimore Grotto

"Do not listen to a word I say
Just listen to what I can keep silent"

Nicky Wire


Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
6 posted 2000-05-28 05:29 AM


Brian,
this is brilliant, I bow humbled by your might muse.... a grand portrayal of images.

I felt the 3rd stanza is the most exquisite..
-------
Finally I placed them to rest, locked away
existing only as prisoners of my mind.
In the confines of my Kindergarden
I shed baby skin, as every breath
draws me closer to stillness.
The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality.
My Lego cocoon crumbles in age,  
time strips away, evolving a new essence of me.  
My childhood burns in the ashes of yesterday.
----------

Regards, Sudhir.



 Life is like a painting,
That in an art gallery is left hanging,
Though many come just to look at it,
A very few actually come to enjoy it.

Lorraine Nisbet
Member
since 2000-05-18
Posts 218
Jersey City, NJ USA
7 posted 2000-05-28 08:59 AM



brian,

Great imagery.  I really enjoyed this poem.  Great job!

~Lorraine

 
A great poet is nothing more....than a discovered amateur


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

8 posted 2000-05-28 12:56 PM


They covered me with cold water kisses
while I teethed in adolescence.
I swore my soul to silence,
pretending false virtue and purity.
They were wide-eyed and dead,
loyal without whispers of mutiny.

Finally I placed them to rest, locked away
existing only as prisoners of my mind.
In the confines of my Kindergarden
I shed baby skin, as every breath
draws me closer to stillness.
The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality.
--------------------

damn..you went deep for this one...
see this is what Im always talking about...
the way your mind works...
you see and analyze things in such a way that you take it to a higher level of writing ...
very cool poem Bri, very

SpitFire
Member Elite
since 2000-04-19
Posts 2396

9 posted 2000-05-28 03:44 PM


~You my friend,...amaze me.   This here is excellent writing.  Gosh, you know...

The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality.
My Lego cocoon crumbles in age,  
time strips away, evolving a new essence of me.  
My childhood burns in the ashes of yesterday.

*Brian,...you've hit this right on.  Much talent.  Wonderful read. *Peace.


Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
10 posted 2000-05-28 07:38 PM


BrianM~
I found this to be deeply-stirring from the inkwell of your soul.

'I sat absorbing drama in the aisles,
with exhibits of food displayed for sedation.'

'The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality.'

Very well done, my poet friend.
~*Marge*~




 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
11 posted 2000-05-28 09:40 PM


Bravo for this one! Excellent
Liz

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

12 posted 2000-05-28 09:46 PM


WOW,great imagery here Brian..Incredible work.  

The apple of youth is given to decay,
with the frozen touch of adult reality......especially loved this!

 Je t'aime plus qu'hier et moins que demain."
I love you more than yesterday and less than tomorrow
(unkown)



bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

13 posted 2000-05-29 12:47 PM


Brian,
If melancholy and wisdom were a stew, I'd ask for seconds! Love yr words.

Mike

shilpi
Member
since 2000-05-24
Posts 73

14 posted 2000-05-29 03:08 AM


The apple of youth is given to decay,
    with the frozen touch of adult reality.
*********

Amazing, Brian, made a wonderful read !!

shilpi

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
15 posted 2000-05-29 06:41 PM



Sudhir WOW.. thank you for your wonderful reply, it means a lot to me. I like the word exquisite a lot.  .

Lorraine, thanks for your kind words and for reading the poem, glad you enjoyed it.

Janet, wow what a comment, thanks. A higher level of writing...I don't know about that. I think this whole site is a higher level of writing. Just glad to be part of that.

SpitFire, thank you…wow. Your comment means a lot.  Amaze…well I do try and the feeling is mutual.

Marge thank you, I am glad that you found the poem deeply stirring thank you for reading and for your kind words. I loved your weeping willow poem.

Elizabeth, thank you for your kind words and for reading the poem.

Dark angel thank you for comment
and for reading the poem…I love that image too. I have a small obsession
with the whole apple of Eden thing, and we have an apple orchard as well.

Sorry Mike, you can only have one helping after all desert is on its way. Thank you for your lovely comment.
Only kidding you are welcome to as much stew as you want.

Shilpi thank you for reading the poem, your comment and I am glad that you enjoyed it.


Thank you all for your beautiful words.




 ------------------------
"Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? "
Douglas Adams.

"Here chewing your tail is joy"

Richey Edwards

"Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time".

Baltimore Grotto

"Do not listen to a word I say
Just listen to what I can keep silent"

Nicky Wire


Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
16 posted 2000-05-29 07:38 PM


Wow!  This is wonderful writing, Brian...really enjoyed reading it!  
Marina
Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245
Pickering, Ontario
17 posted 2000-05-29 08:35 PM


Brian, true talent you have my friend!  Wonderful poem.

Marina

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