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Passions in Poetry

Scabs and Scars

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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


0 posted 05-21-2000 02:56 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for serenity blaze

Strange, vague, ceiling,
hanging low...
walls have ears but never boast--
a blessing they don't speak.
Together, individually,
smiling quite contentedly,
smug superiority--
like eating popcorn at the show.

Groping blindly, stare unkindly,
at the stranger you once knew.
Wilted rose, trail of clothes,
half-empty glasses wearing clues.
Quiet now, rise from the bed--
silence voice within your head.
Deny this part of you in you.
Fight the shame that's creeping through,
disgusting as a pile of puke.

Careful not to shake the bed
(like you could wake the living dead...)
paranoid, how your eyes dread
eyes that meet and speak the truth.
Sifting through a careless mess,
find what's yours--forget the rest.
Double-check--nothing's left--
reminders of the night before...
Reality, a crash of wave,
reveals remains of sandy grave.
Red dawn on some familiar shore,
gently now, you close the door...

Outside there's an eastern sky--
exhale and the squint of eyes.
Pardoned, but there's no relief.
No reprieve for faithless priest.
A rooster crows, depression grows,
robbed--you thought yourself the thief...
Head pounding now at a dull roar
(What hunger filled will beg for more?)

Sorrow, counting doors you've closed.
Remembering the wilted rose.
Like scabs and scars on festered sore,
are memories of nights before.
© Copyright 2000 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Michael
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 08-13-99
Posts 6333
California


1 posted 05-21-2000 03:50 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Sigh - this is overflowing with pain and emptiness, that is found only within a shared hell.  I can truly empathise with you on this, Serenity, I have been there...  ((HUGS)) to you...


michael
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


2 posted 05-21-2000 04:02 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Thank you Michael for that sigh of a reply...smile...you too, are up late--but it's getting early, must write one sometime called "Serenity Sleeps"....love to ya.
brian madden
Member Elite
since 05-06-2000
Posts 4532
ireland


3 posted 05-21-2000 04:48 AM       View Profile for brian madden   Email brian madden   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for brian madden

I have just finished reading the poem for a second time and again it sent a shiver down my spine. The emotions that run through this
seem so dark, there is little light in there.
Here is { a hug  ) and a   for what they are worth. very well written.  
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


4 posted 05-21-2000 11:23 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

Groping blindly, stare unkindly,
at the stranger you once knew.
Wilted rose, trail of clothes,
half-empty glasses wearing clues.
Quiet now, rise from the bed--
silence voice within your head.
Deny this part of you in you.
Fight the shame that's creeping through,
disgusting as a pile of puke.

Careful not to shake the bed
(like you could wake the living dead...)
paranoid, how your eyes dread
eyes that meet and speak the truth.
Sifting through a careless mess,
find what's yours--forget the rest.
Double-check--nothing's left--
reminders of the night before...
Reality, a crash of wave,
------------------
Pardoned, but there's no relief.
No reprieve for faithless priest.
A rooster crows, depression grows,
robbed--you thought yourself the thief...
Head pounding now at a dull roar
(What hunger filled will beg for more?)

Sorrow, counting doors you've closed.
Remembering the wilted rose.
Like scabs and scars on festered sore,
are memories of nights before.
-------------

*sitting here stunned*
*mouth open, shaking head in awe*
omg...
girl, I truly am a loss for words to
express how this poem effects me.
damn! i am blown by the emotions and honesty
of this piece.
(remember, when you said you were bored with writing in "cliche")
well you can stop worring about that now.*smile*
you ache and bleed with grace in this one
me sweet twin...
you know...I know, we know...
loves ya me sweet serenity.
jm

ps...where is our fav squirrel??
me thinks its time to send out a search party



 Some things cannot be explained by verses that rhyme,
They are not measured by the commitment of time.
Some emotions run too deep to be described by words,
Forgiveness and understanding-remain the most beautiful words ever heard.
~Janet Marie~

"What the caterpillar calls the end ...
The world calls a butterfly"
~Lao Tze Tao~
~Butterflies are meant to be free~


Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


5 posted 05-21-2000 07:49 PM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

serenity,
         there really are no words to describe this. . . the pain is evident. . . it is one that I pray you will be delivered from. . . take that little bit of light and let it grow inside you. . .you will find your way. . .

Superb poem, my friend...

---------------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

spiked
Senior Member
since 01-13-2000
Posts 886
Hammond, La USA


6 posted 05-22-2000 01:18 AM       View Profile for spiked   Email spiked   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for spiked

not dark but deeply sadening.
you have captured the true spirit of the evil that creeps the misery through us.
thankx
Rich
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 01-03-2000
Posts 8382


7 posted 05-22-2000 01:47 AM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bsquirrel

Hey, sen. (don't ask where that nickname just came from, because when you really think about it, it don't make much sense)

Loved the poem. The part that really blew me away was near the end, when the narrator says she thought herself the thief -- surprised to be robbed herself. Wow. I don't say that word out loud a lot while I'm reading, but that one just slipped out, like unconsciousness. "Wow."

Hope you're doin' a'ight,

Mike
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


8 posted 05-22-2000 06:43 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Hello friends---thank you for your generous replies---means much to me...and worry not, Sven--just another demon slain from the memory archive--nothin' to it but work my way through it...and Mike--you've made my day...shall e you soon, I promise, I've been busy this time...get on Janet Marie about our little project will ya?  and brian--thank you as well, a I know you are a thoughtful poet...okay, okay,  I'll shaddup....THANK YOU FORUM...I owe you guys some replies...back later...  
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


9 posted 05-22-2000 06:45 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

damn...almost forgot, have said thank you so much to you richard, I think I say it in my sleep (that's gonna get me in trouble...)  hugs and grins, my friend...stay happy.
Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 12-26-1999
Posts 5512
Ontario, CANADA


10 posted 08-04-2001 09:22 PM       View Profile for Honeybee   Email Honeybee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Honeybee


Gawd, your writing leaves me in awe!  boy, do I ever relate~

Melissa~
 
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