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Open Poetry #7
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These eyes. in response to Isis' challenge.
| Open Poetry #7 |
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These eyes. in response to Isis' challenge. |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland 
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The challenge is to write a poem about eyesight, or not 'seeing' the beauty around you that you often take for granted. -------------------------------------- These eyes What good are they when they only seek the ugly marrow of a lifeless lie? I chew my bone behind the monotone, a shade of grey she slowly bleaches black. A grizzled taste in mouth I'll speak my toxin tongue spits my foul obscenities in all directions. My victims, aimless shadows closing in I can not see faces, only sense the walls tightening and the noise with out apparent sources rising. This torture of my black box. I hate you GOD, Call him merciful, honour his love I deem him whore. I have been the bright little one cleansed and repentant, no naughty things slipped from me, I embraced the beauties then one day I woke… And I could no longer see. |
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| © Copyright 2000 brian madden - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Stark and powerful...sounds good out loud...and great ending! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
you must have quite a view out your window where you live.  WOW where do you come up with this stuff. the imagery is "in your face" as one reads this. you challenge the challenge LOL later poetic professor, jm Some things cannot be explained by verses that rhyme, They are not measured by the commitment of time. Some emotions run too deep to be described by words, Forgiveness and understanding-remain the most beautiful words ever heard. ~Janet Marie~ "What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly" ~Lao Tze Tao~ ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Thanks Martie, I may try reading it out aloud when my parents are not around, I don't want to scare them. lol Janet, well I have a really nice view of trees and and a large field, being surrounded by nature you would think I would be writing more about the wonders of the world. Going blind is one of my biggest fears, I don't think I would be able to cope, I guess that is where the poem came from. ========================================= "Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?" Douglas Adams |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
I must agree with Martie...very powerful and striking when read aloud. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Brian, Good Morning,, You are a POET my friend and I read it out loud WOW, WOW again you have a way with words. Awesome!!!! Love, Cerenity |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Quite well done, challenge well met! |
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