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Passions in Poetry

Beauty is agony .Palindrome response to Sven's challenge

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brian madden
Member Elite
since 05-06-2000
Posts 4532
ireland


0 posted 05-20-2000 11:04 AM       View Profile for brian madden   Email brian madden   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for brian madden

Ok here is my response to Sven's Palindrome  challenge, if anyone is wondering it is abstract gothic...!?!
====================
Beauty is agony
Sore scars scratching
Weeping under desire of black vacant eyes
Hands bare to cross
Nails to feet,
Mother close mouth silent.
Mortuary in lovers of roses
swallowed in sand,  
Jesus of crucifix
Penance for pretty boys,
Cleansed souls, murderers
Addicts of blood spill.
Redemption granted.
Granted redemption.
Spill blood of addicts
Murders, souls cleansed
Boys pretty for penance
Crucifix of Jesus
Sand in swallowed,
Roses of lovers in mortuary
Silent mouth close mother.
Feet to nails
Cross to bare hands
Eyes vacant black of desire under weeping
scratching sore scars
Agony is beauty



[This message has been edited by brian madden (edited 05-20-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 brian madden - All Rights Reserved
Sven
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Member Laureate
since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


1 posted 05-20-2000 12:01 PM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Excellent Brian!!

Love the setting, abstract gothic, really let you play with the placement of the words. . .

Superb images, especially when read aloud. . .

Well done, my friend. . .

------------------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


2 posted 05-20-2000 12:55 PM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

Brilliant work, Brian, nice setting and appropriate words...

Penance for pretty boys,
Cleansed souls, murderers
Addicts of blood spill.
Redemption granted.
Granted redemption.
Spill blood of addicts
Murders, souls cleansed
Boys pretty of penance

only one word amiss for <-> of, but that was necessary to be placed like that, I guess.

Exceptional talent you have friend,
Regards,
Sudhir



 Life is like a painting,
That in an art gallery is left hanging,
Though many come just to look at it,
A very few actually come to enjoy it.
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


3 posted 05-20-2000 04:18 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

*bows before her prince*
~i am not worthy~

again I say...you scare me.
awesome Bri, truly.

you genius poets
Sven>Sudhir>Brian...
need to stop using these big words...(Palindrome)  
mere mortals like me have no clue  

later-gators
jm


 Some things cannot be explained by verses that rhyme,
They are not measured by the commitment of time.
Some emotions run too deep to be described by words,
Forgiveness and understanding-remain the most beautiful words ever heard.
~Janet Marie~

"What the caterpillar calls the end ...
The world calls a butterfly"
~Lao Tze Tao~
~Butterflies are meant to be free~


SpitFire
Member Elite
since 04-19-2000
Posts 2428


4 posted 05-20-2000 04:30 PM       View Profile for SpitFire   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SpitFire

~Holy moly,....so glad I clicked to read this one.  Very interesting...uuummm,...feeling a bit inadequate here..lol...superb writing.
brian madden
Member Elite
since 05-06-2000
Posts 4532
ireland


5 posted 05-20-2000 05:07 PM       View Profile for brian madden   Email brian madden   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for brian madden

Sven, thank you for kind comments and for setting the challenge, though really I feel as though I just strung a bunch of images to together. Your Palindrome was quite stunning.

Sudhir,Thank you for pointing out my typo,
I will fix it right now.  
thank your for your suggestion and also for very kind words. I only write what I feel but thank you, there is no shortage of  
Exceptional talent on this site.

Ah Janet, sorry for using big words. but I don't have a clue what they mean either. lol
I love the taoist quote. But we all know that you are no mere mortal, you can't fool us.

SpitFire,thank you. inadequate...never say that, your poems humble us all.  


Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 03-16-2000
Posts 5900
Lansing, MI USA


6 posted 05-20-2000 10:09 PM       View Profile for Lone Wolf   Email Lone Wolf   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lone Wolf

Brian,

Great imagery!!  You have met Sven's challenge very well.  Have to get to work on mine.  Nice job!!  

LW
 
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