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Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California

0 posted 2000-05-17 09:54 PM


The Strings of Your Closed Eyes

I could sing this song all day
my love in glorious abandon spreading
across the glass of your blue tune
the length of you I play
on the strings of your closed eyes
with the silky husk of time’s finger tips
that leaks such stories
that my heart weeps blood
and gets tangled in the twisted gossamer.

Dance with me in dreamy dare
in this fragrant rhythm I feel real
and I will pull you to my strength
and you will feed me chocolate
and touch me with your tongued
legs wrapped and pulsing
across the place where a day
becomes a life

and for this time of stars and moons
laughter will be our clothing
and listening will be our food
for this is what I whisper
in my flowing lacy sweep of time
I whisper now is forever
sing to me forever
love me forever.


[This message has been edited by Martie (edited 05-17-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
1 posted 2000-05-17 10:21 PM


So lovely, I especially liked:

"for this is what I whisper
in my flowing lacy sweep of time
I whisper now is forever"

Corinne

Balladeer
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since 1999-06-05
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Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
2 posted 2000-05-17 11:07 PM


Simply magical, Martie, the images you can produce with your words......beautiful
Denise
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since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

3 posted 2000-05-17 11:19 PM


Very beautiful, Martie! This flows so smoothly!  

Denise

Marge Tindal
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since 1999-11-06
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
4 posted 2000-05-18 06:32 AM


Martie~
Whatever you write sings with abandon ...
this plucks the heartstrings too.
What a gal !
Love ya'
~*Marge*~



 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
5 posted 2000-05-18 06:37 AM


Martie~
This was a delight to read  
Your last stanza superb.
Tracie~


 Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe



Corazon
Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

6 posted 2000-05-18 09:48 AM


magical is the word for this....sigh....wow
Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
7 posted 2000-05-18 07:45 PM


Thanks Corinne--i'm glad you liked it.

Balladeer--thanks for the magical reply

Denise--You always say such nice things

Marge--Thanks my friend..love right back at ya

Tracie--I'm so glad you found delight in this poem...

Corazon--sure glad to have given you a sigh...thanks.

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
8 posted 2000-05-19 06:03 AM


Life, Love, Passion, The purpose of Life, all wrapped up in one sweet love song.
Simply Exquisite.
Extraordinary writing
Liz

Parker
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since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
9 posted 2000-05-20 02:09 AM


Martie, I don't know but this seems a little different for you. Loved the word choices.

These lines kinda jumped out at me...

and you will feed me chocolate
and touch me with your tongued
legs wrapped and pulsing

Well, they were a little to much for me, but i'll get my breath back.

Parker

Martie
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
10 posted 2000-05-20 11:46 AM


Liz--I'm so glad you read this and liked it...thank you for the exquistite, dear friend.

Parker--calm down...and thanks so much for the read.

poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646
Arkansas
11 posted 2000-05-20 01:23 PM


Wow oh wow, I can't even explain what all I just experienced while reading this!  Superb, and what a poem!  Talk about taking the reader on a trip!  Well done to say the least!  I think I better go reread it!  hehe  I think some of it went over my blonde highlights!  Whoosh!     
brian madden
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since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
12 posted 2000-05-20 05:42 PM


Martie, that was quiet beautiful. magical, vivid imagery.
Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
13 posted 2000-05-21 12:14 PM


Wonderful Martie!!

Just sings with the knowledge of love and comfort...

Excellent!!

----------------------------------------------------------

 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl


Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

14 posted 2000-05-21 06:08 AM


Martie, once again your poetic sorcery delights my mind...oh so magical, this.

~ Claire

 Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
15 posted 2000-08-30 12:03 PM


"and I will pull you to my strength
and you will feed me chocolate
and touch me with your tongued
legs wrapped and pulsing
across the place where a day
becomes a life

and for this time of stars and moons
laughter will be our clothing
and listening will be our food
for this is what I whisper
in my flowing lacy sweep of time
I whisper now is forever
sing to me forever
love me forever."

as much as I liked the entire poem and the beginning - Thes last lines touched me so very much - I felt I had to post them here.
I don't think I need tell you why. Thank you for calling it to my attention.  

Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

16 posted 2001-10-13 05:36 PM


Oh I can't beleive I missed this!
this is so beautiful so magical and the ending lines made me melt.

Love it Martie  

Maree.

CocoBaci
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 3043

17 posted 2001-11-11 01:30 AM


Magnificent!
A jewel of a poem sweetMartie...
*~coco~*

Ratleader
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18 posted 2005-01-06 07:14 AM


Sweet....makes me want to go there...or any place like it, if there is anyplace like it. I wish I'd stumbled upon this poem long ago.

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______________Ratleader______________

Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
19 posted 2005-01-06 04:11 PM


When the time is right,
this is ripe for a repost.

Ratleader
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Member Rara Avis
since 2003-01-23
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Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass
20 posted 2005-01-06 10:20 PM


I was thinking EXACTLY the same thing.

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