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To Touch and Feel (In memory of Margaret)
| Open Poetry #7 |
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To Touch and Feel (In memory of Margaret) |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
To Touch and Feel She always cooked the most delicious meals. The finest steaks that she could grill. We both shared a common fate. Divorce left us alone without our mates. We opened our hearts enough to let each other in. We soon became the best of friends. Before I met her she was a successful Doctor's wife. She enjoyed traveling and loved to socialize. She could dance the night away under starlit nights. They traveled the world together and it was a lovely life. Each and everyplace they'd go she'd have new travel pictures to show. Her picture book was filled with memories of these lovely happy days. Until...one dark and disgusting day the new secretary in the doctors office stole her doctors heart away. This new secretary knew the very first day that all of the Doctors would look her way. And in her heart she would say which one would take a good look and never look away. Why did it have to be Margarets man. Was it something she did wrong. This was one thing she would never understand. In Margarets eyes this girl will always be the young office worker who took her life away. a devastation beyond her control thru and thru. How could she have possibly knew. All of the other Doctors and Margarets friends took her side. The Doctor didn't care, he said.."I'm out of here." He said, "Margaret I've found someone I like better." "So what if you worked your butt off to put me thru Medical School." "I know who I Love, I'm a Doctor, not a fool!!!" "Hey thats not my concern..its a low priority if I broke my wife's heart. My life now seeks a brand new start." His new life now became her legacy. She the Doctors jilted ex-wife now somehow destined to live a sad and lonely life. He and his new wife living the dream he and she once shared. She soon found life is not so nice to become this Doctors yesterday wife. It was hard to forgive this man. The man she had loved simply announced one day, its over, I don't love you anymore. And then suddenly he was gone he walked right away from their door. A divorce came soon as she knew it would. Now the secretary stands where she once stood. As for Margaret, all alone she will stand. She feels rejected as if no one understands. The only truth she can understand is that her ex's new wife has somehow stolen away her life and left her in the company of pain and strife. The new wife proudly takes her place to enjoy every pleasure that Margaret once embraced. For Margaret the loving and the caring will soon depart and be replaced by an endless hurting heart. I met her about four years later after the dear doctor was gone and she was doing better. But still somehow she embraced the pain. I too knew the pain of a divorce...and so we shared our stories and our pain, we shared a friendship, some companionship, and for awhile our lives were interwoven and we shared everything. Still in her heart I don't think she could begin to think that love would visit with her again. Because if Love is really real wouldn't her husbands love still be her's to touch and feel? They always say someday things will get better. Hurt is not here to stay as time will help it go away. I knew she tried to go that way, yet new heartache's seemed to always put on a show and her dear Mothers death now struck yet another blow to a grief strickin heart that had already sunken so low. A brief marriage to an old friend failed almost as soon as it began. Perhaps her heart had not yet healed. Perhaps she could never trust his love to be real. Or maybe it was exactly what she said to me..."He only wants my money...not really me." In her heart she thought no love was there only greed permeated the air. Still no one could say she didn't have a generous heart. Her nephew graduated from college with honors and is now a CPA cause of dear Margaret who paid his way. I always tried to be her friend even though we simply could never both agree to try a little harder to believe that we could have been much more than a friend if we could have agreed to open wide our hearts and let each other come in. I could sense we each only gave a small part of our hearts and we never quite gave our all almost as if we knew we were headed for a fall. I moved to Hawaii and we kept in touch. We both had another in our life but friends we stayed. We would meet again someday, somehow, someway.. Two years passed and by now my marriage had failed so miserably. My thoughts turned to Margaret, my friend far across the sea. I remembered all the times she told me she loved me. The times she opened her heart so warm and tenderly. All those delicious dinners we shared. Everyway she showed how much she cared. Another fatal blow soon came to stay when the news arrived that her brother in Kentucky had just passed away. First her mother now her brother. Why must so much death and sorrow come her way? It hurt me so to see her grieving once more. My special friend was hurt again. How much pain must one person endure. She had all she could bear. Of this I'm sure. My nine days of vacation will begin today. For over two years I've been in Hawaii so far away. I'm 30,000 feet up in the sky they say. Soon my family and friends will welcome my nine day stay. Soon enough the day arrived when me and Margaret could share some time. We ate the most wonderful steak dinner that night. We talked about future plans for our lives. She told me her most treasured desire would be to come and share 30 days in Hawaii with me. I said "Dear Margaret where would you stay." "With you James, I'd have it no other way." We shared all the times that we had missed. We shared one last lingering kiss. You see, all our hopes's and dreams would end that night. My friend Margaret would never awake to see the morning light. When I called the following day, I reached her friend who told me our friend Margaret had passed away. And I know that on that very moment she entered into heavens gates. To fully understand her life I must tell you that thru all her hurt and pain she did find someone to Love again. She's in his arms this very day in a place where Love never even thinks about going away. No more earthly sorrow and pain. A place where love will dwell for all eternity. This is the heavenly place she longed to see. I know she loved her family and friends more each day yet there was now another she loved in everyway. He was the one who promised her he would never leave her or forsake her. His heart would always stay his love could never go away. I share this belief with Margaret..that to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord. In the sweet by and by Jesus wipes her tear stained eyes. No, its not sad and lonely tears she now cries. It tears of joy to be home at last at Jesus' side. I share the joy and give you all the hope in my heart when I say...I'll be meeting Margaret and Jesus, my special friends, right on the streets of heaven one fine and glorious day. And you know what...that day doesn't seem so far away. In memory of my special friend Margaret Stieger Jameslee@May16,2000 sheandheareinmyheart sheisinmymemories sheiswithJesus heiswithme. [This message has been edited by jmlee12345 (edited 05-17-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 JamesMichael - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
This is a lovely and touching tribute to Margaret, James. I'm sure she's smiling down on you! Denise |
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Marina Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245Pickering, Ontario |
Absolutely beatiful James! Marina |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
SBJ this poem is SO beautiful and full of your gentle loving heart and touches me deeply. im sorry for your loss, your poem last lines mirrored one I wrote for the same reasons I wanted to share it with you. this tribute is perfect and you have done her proud. take care sweet-poet jm ~Heavens Not So Far Away~ So little time now has passed, since you left this earth... my tired and worn angel--called home on the 30th anniversary of his birth. I'm still accepting and learning to let go, I'm still healing...it will take a long time-I know. I live in the love we shared and the promises made, I remain in awe of you, the strength and faith you displayed. I could never repay the gifts that your love gave to me... now comforted by your poems at night -- when I miss you so desperately. I know you are in a better place, all of the hurt and pain-you are now spared, Its selfish of me to still wish you were here, but I loved you more than I ever dared. I'm so very grateful for the time we had and as I accept that your gone to stay... I still feel you here in my heart...and I know...Heavens not so far away. Janet Marie 2/12/00 |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Denise, Marina, and Marie for reading and responding...I appreciate it very much. Denise I can only hope she is smiling down on me because I want to see my friend again. Marina I am thrilled that you said this was beautiful. Janet you better watch out or I'm going to start calling you baby girl Marie. Your beautiful words are like receiving a bunch of beautiful roses...so refreshing at times. My friend Margaret passed away when I was visiting California last Christmas. I am thankful that we were able to spend one last time together. Of course I miss her but I know that she is with her Heavenly Father and who could ask for anything more. Your poem is beautiful. Yes I see some of the same hopes and thoughts within your poem. When you say that its selfish to wish you were still here, I felt those feelings also, but it was only my caring, from the top of my heart I know she is the one who is truly living and I still must die to be with him and with her and all of those I Love and miss. "The day doesn't seem so far away". exactly the same feelings I have experienced...knowing that she is in the better place. Your Loved one has such a precious heart to live on in and you are living in his. Take care Baby Girl Marie. James |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
A very special friendship and a heartfelt tribute Liz |
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rene Member
since 2000-04-24
Posts 113 |
if someone wrote this of me after i was gone, i would know my time had been well spent. beautiful |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
James, it is obvious in the reading that you loved and respected Margaret very much. Your attitude is lovely, that you will be with her again one day. It is difficult for us to know that the ones we care for are hurting or have been hurt by others, yet sometimes our own sorrow and mistrust shadows and follows us so closely that reaching out as much as we would like seems nearly impossible. Thank you for sharing this sincerely written work. I admire your sensitivity and am sorry for the loss of your friend. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
~Excellent writing! Life is not fair, but it is good. And one of the good things in Margaret's life was you. She was so fortunate to have a friend such as yourself. Really enjoyed reading this story. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Liz, Rene, Claire and Danny for your wonderful responses. Yes Liz I knew Margaret for 8 years and I always considered her a special friend. I was blessed to have her as a friend. Rene thank you for saying this was beautiful. Claire your words are full of compassions...thank you for understanding. Danny I was blessed to have her in my life...when I really needed a close friend she was there for me...her friendship gave me strength and helped me heal from a heartbreak...she accepted me just as I was. Another good thing in life is having people like you that can empathize and offer understanding. Thank you. James |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
james-- there are no words that i could write that would do this poem justice. this was simly without a doubt one of the most beautiful things ive ever read!! your friend margaret and u shared a special friendship! i am glad you got to spend that one last time with her, before it was her time to go. you paint such a lovely picture with your words. your heart is the size of texas m'friend. i wish you nothing but the best! take care, amy  ~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~ |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Amy for such sweet thoughts from you. I also am thankful for the wonderful evening we spent together..it was a gift from God for both of us...a special memory in my heart. James |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Back to the top for my friend Andy who also shared a friendship with Margaret...the lady that is in heaven with Jesus...James |
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