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Passions in Poetry

Seeking Rhyme and Reason

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Denise
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0 posted 05-13-2000 08:52 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Denise

Unbidden, yet you come to pierce my heart
Reminding me of all that has been lost
In darkest night or at the new dawn’s start
You’re lurking close exacting loving’s cost.
You ride the breeze of each crisp autumn day
And hide within the chill of wintertime
You bring again ice-laden clouds of gray
Concealing all life’s harmony and rhyme.
The hopefulness of spring demands you leave
You fiercely choke each robin’s lovely trill
You drown me in your mighty waves that heave
And pulverize my soul with sorrow’s fill.

Will changing seasons ever bring relief
Unfettered by these chains of sorest grief?


Denise


© Copyright 2000 Denise - All Rights Reserved
Jeffrey Carter
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since 04-08-2000
Posts 2424
State of constant confusion!


1 posted 05-13-2000 09:06 PM       View Profile for Jeffrey Carter   Email Jeffrey Carter   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jeffrey Carter

Denise,

I tried to pick my favorite line, but couldn't choose just one. Thanks for sharing this piece.

All my love,
Jeffrey

 I lie awake in a world filled with dreams,
but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep

SpitFire
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since 04-19-2000
Posts 2428


2 posted 05-13-2000 09:14 PM       View Profile for SpitFire   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SpitFire

~Denise,...this is beautifully written.  I enjoyed the read.  Bitterly cold yet beautiful. *Thanks for sharing.
WhtDove
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since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


3 posted 05-13-2000 10:19 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Denise you amaze me! You come up with something sad and wonderfully written when you don't feel like this? How do ya do it?

Emotions so well expressed!! Always a pleasure to read your work. Glad your muse came back    Hope it stays around a while!

ps HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!
Denise
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4 posted 05-13-2000 10:30 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thank you Jeffrey, SpitFire and Rebecca for reading and commenting. I wrote this after pondering the grieving process, remembering how I felt at the height of it. It comes and goes at times but is no where near as severe as before. I tried to capture the utter despair that I felt after losing loved ones, the intense indescribable pain that I experienced. Thanks again for your lovely comments!  

Denise
Lost Dreamer
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since 06-20-99
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5 posted 05-14-2000 09:27 AM       View Profile for Lost Dreamer   Email Lost Dreamer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lost Dreamer

Powerful poem here Denise, and wonderfully written. You are very talented and I am happy your muse is returning.  
Kit McCallum
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since 04-30-2000
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6 posted 05-14-2000 10:05 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

Wonderful and powerful Denise ... you've captured your feelings well in this piece ... I enjoyed the seasonal change theme a great deal.

Best wishes,
/Kit
Denise
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7 posted 05-14-2000 03:25 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thank you, Gloria and Kit for reading and for your lovely comments! I'm glad you enjoyed it!  

Denise

Seymour Tabin
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since 07-07-99
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Tamarac Fla


8 posted 05-14-2000 03:43 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Denise,
Well written beautiful poem. *L*
JamesMichael
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since 11-16-1999
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Kapolei, Hawaii, USA


9 posted 05-14-2000 07:48 PM       View Profile for JamesMichael   Email JamesMichael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JamesMichael

"Will changing seasons ever bring relief..unfettered by these chains of sorest grief?"   I have ask myself this question many times before but not as eloquently as you...James
Marge Tindal
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10 posted 05-14-2000 07:55 PM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Denise~
A very well-written piece that shows your capabilities of telling it like it is.
I think we all can understand and perhaps relate to these events in our lives.
Thank you for the thoughtfulness of this render.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

lorilockheart
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since 05-06-2000
Posts 206
Alabama


11 posted 05-14-2000 08:19 PM       View Profile for lorilockheart   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lorilockheart

"Reminding me of all that has been lost
In darkest night or at the new dawn’s start
You’re lurking close exacting loving’s cost."

A very touching expression of how that loss, and grief never really leaves you.  It is always there - lurking.  And it takes a little part of you with it.  

Very true, beautiful, and well-thought.

Lori


 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean. Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens. Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance - I hope you dance.
song by LeeAnn Womack
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HelmutB
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since 01-06-2000
Posts 989
Canada


12 posted 05-15-2000 12:59 AM       View Profile for HelmutB   Email HelmutB   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit HelmutB's Home Page   View IP for HelmutB

Denise
Such lines so powerful yet sad
I don't have much time, it makes me sad
I loved your poem this much I can say
Now I have to run and be on my way
But know I will return some day


 The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools.

wayoutwalt
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13 posted 05-15-2000 01:07 AM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

geesh denise seeing the title i thought the poem was gonna be about me or somethin but it was so good yuh it was sad and lovely
Dark Angel
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since 08-04-99
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14 posted 05-15-2000 01:13 AM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

This is sadly beautiful Denise! enjoyed  

 What comes from the heart goes to the heart.
Samuel Coleridge


di Morte
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since 05-13-2000
Posts 8


15 posted 05-15-2000 01:39 AM       View Profile for di Morte   Email di Morte   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for di Morte

excellent work, d and smoooooooooooooches 2 u 2   )))
Danny Holloway
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since 01-15-2000
Posts 2072
Tulsa, OK


16 posted 05-15-2000 10:21 AM       View Profile for Danny Holloway   Email Danny Holloway   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Danny Holloway

"these chains of sorest grief, reminding me of all that has been lost"
sends a chill to the innermost soul.
excellent writing!
dh


 A life isn't significant except for its impact on other lives.

RSEvans
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since 10-23-1999
Posts 1187
Tulsa, OK, USA


17 posted 05-15-2000 11:04 AM       View Profile for RSEvans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RSEvans

darker than usual for you, Denise...but lovely nonetheless.  Here's hoping seasons change brings some warmth into your life once again.  Rob
Corinne
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since 10-28-1999
Posts 5247
state of confusion


18 posted 05-15-2000 11:11 AM       View Profile for Corinne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corinne

Chilling, Denise.

Corinne
Denise
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19 posted 05-15-2000 02:01 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thank you all for reading and commenting!

Sy- A well written from you brings me a smile! Thank you!  

James- Thanks for the 'eloquently'!

Marge- Thanks Marge, yes, we all can or will one day relate to grief, some more than others.

Lori- Yes, it does take a piece of us. Thanks!

Helmut- Now don't be gone too long this time! Thanks!

Walt- See? There is a method to my madness, I knew the title would pull you in!   Thanks!

D.A.- Thanks so much!

di Morte- Thanks! Smoooooooches right back 2 U !  

Danny- Yes, grief goes right to our core. Thanks!

Rob- The skies are beginning to clear, thank you!  

Corinne- Thanks so much!

Denise

TerryW
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since 03-23-2000
Posts 787
Louisville, Mississippi, USA


20 posted 05-15-2000 02:28 PM       View Profile for TerryW   Email TerryW   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit TerryW's Home Page   View IP for TerryW

Denise~
     Wow, dear!   Very good.  I like the mood that comes from these lines:


You ride the breeze of each crisp autumn day   And hide within the chill of wintertime
You bring again ice-laden clouds of gray
Concealing all life’s harmony and rhyme.

Like the perfect emotive and beautiful yet cold and unfeelingness of Ice.  It can capture your heart and stir your eye, yet leave you chilled to the bone.    I like this one!



Love Ya~

 ~you reached inside, you touched my heart,
and I am all the better for it~
Terry A. Woodson, Jr.
Beki
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since 09-15-99
Posts 1615
Newport Beach, CA, USA


21 posted 05-15-2000 02:38 PM       View Profile for Beki   Email Beki   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Beki

nicely written sonnet...love the ending couplet!
RAM
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since 03-24-2000
Posts 153


22 posted 05-15-2000 02:41 PM       View Profile for RAM   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RAM

Wow, Denise.  well crafted.  seldom have I seen such a sharp point wielded by a sonnet.

Rick
Denise
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23 posted 05-15-2000 04:14 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Thank you, Terry, Beki and Rick for reading and for your wonderful comments! I'm glad you liked it!

Denise
RainbowGirl
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since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


24 posted 05-15-2000 07:44 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

That's two on the trot you got me with, Denise...

Big HUSG
 
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