How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #7 Archive
 The Pretender
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

The Pretender

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


0 posted 05-10-2000 09:11 AM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse



The Pretender


The handsome woman falls from love again
as, low, the shadows marr her moistened cheek
His words had fraught her well of inking pen
This morning's sonnet song she cannot speak

And though she knows there will be many tears
She shall not love another in this way
for words cannot, in darkness, reappear
and syllables, sweet, cannot her heart display

So on she moves about her charming life
tearstained behind a mask of sweetest silk
Beside her lies her cold and sharpest knife
Her cup is full but tastes of bitter milk

And in the dim and dark'ning hours of night
she lies between the supple solemn lace
and yearns for words, his lanterns glowing bright
to come and lift the mask from off her face




Dear LadyClaire


© Copyright 2000 Meadowmuse - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


1 posted 05-10-2000 09:26 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

This one will haunt all who read it...very well done, Claire...
Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


2 posted 05-10-2000 09:28 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

This is exquisite, Claire. Very touching.
I saw you mention the other day thay you had never been able to pen a sonnet. Well, since I have seen this, I beg to disagree! You have the rhythm and rhyme scheme evident in this to prove that you can. And sonnets are easier than this one you have written since they are only fourteen lines (the last two being a rhyming couplet). I love this, Claire, very beautiful!

Denise
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 04-30-2000
Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada


3 posted 05-10-2000 09:37 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

This has such a wonderful flow and descriptive qualities Claire ... a beautiful poem.

Best wishes,
/Kit
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


4 posted 05-10-2000 10:46 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

So touchingly fragile and delicate.  Well done, Claire.
Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


5 posted 05-10-2000 11:17 AM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

Sweet lullabies she to herself does sing,
Hoping all this was a dream gone bad,
She hopes her lover will come back with a wedding ring,
Helping her to be lifted, never to be left sad...

Claire, this is a good one, I am enthralled by the way you put across the feelings...
particularly the last two lines
"and yearns for words, his lanterns glowing bright
to come and lift the mask from off her face"

Regards,
Sudhir


 In any moment of decision,
The best thing you can do is the right thing,
The next-best thing is the wrong thing,
And the worst thing you can do is nothing.
- Theodore Roosevelt
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


6 posted 05-10-2000 11:50 AM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Meadow,
Many wonderful lines, I enjoyed this very much. *L*
Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


7 posted 05-10-2000 12:25 PM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Claire,
       this is indeed very touching. . . it spoke to my heart. . .delicate and full of yearning and longing. . .

"And in the dim and dark'ning hours of night
she lies between the supple solemn lace
and yearns for words, his lanterns glowing bright
to come and lift the mask from off her face"

We all yearn for that someone to speak to us the words that we long to hear. . .sometimes it happens quickly, sometimes. . . it takes a lifetime. . . don't stop. . . keep looking. . .

Superb. . .

-------------------------------------------------------------



 That which gives light must endure burning
--Victor Frankl

Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


8 posted 05-10-2000 06:05 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

Sunshine, my sincere thanks...

Denise, thank you, I may try a sonnet or two eventually.. glad you liked this one though...

Kit, many thanks. I don't know if I've had the pleasure or good manners to welcome you to Passions, so please forgive my latecoming. You'll enjoy it here, I think.

Martie, thank you, my friend...

Sudhir, what a beautiful versed response...thankyou...and glad you enjoyed...

Seymour, it is nice to know you found this an enjoyable read...thank you for letting me know...

Sven, my friend, you needn't be concerned about me... I understand about lifetimes...   Thank you for reading this ...

~ Claire




 Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau




[This message has been edited by Meadowmuse (edited 05-10-2000).]
Meadowmuse will be notified of replies
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #7 >> The Pretender Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors