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Passions in Poetry

What You Pray For

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Michael
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0 posted 05-09-2000 09:35 PM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Michael

WHAT YOU PRAY FOR


"Be careful what you pray for,"
Someone once said to me.
I guess I should have listened,
Or let well enough be.

But I asked God to let me
See myself through your eyes.
Hoping I could fix my faults,
Not find out all these lies.

But here they lay before me,
There's no denying now.
By Divine intervention,
I'm still not quite sure how...

But it's tearing me inside,
And ripping me in two.
How could I have been so blind
Not to see the real you?

Now, once again, I'm kneeling,
Though more careful in prayer.
"God, please just let me forget
That she was ever there."

"Close my eyes forever,
If that's what it will take.
Please just tell me when will I
Atone for this mistake?"

"Make me so unforgiving
That my heart turns to stone,
That none would care if I lived,
Or chose to die alone."

It still throws me how I wished
My every dream upon
Someone who ne'er let me know
‘Twas me the joke was on.

But even in this silence,
I can "see" your laughter.
And the rolling of your eyes,
Shall haunt me ever after.

Can't live with this but I know
I never will forget.
Yeah, careful what you pray for,
That's just what you might get...


Michael Anderson



 For all behind was dark and drear,
And all before was night and fear.
How many hours of night or day
In those suspended pangs I lay,
I could not tell; I scarcely knew
If this were human breath I drew.

Lord Byron






[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 05-09-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
Kellsue
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since 05-06-2000
Posts 221
Waukesha, WI USA


1 posted 05-09-2000 09:45 PM       View Profile for Kellsue   Email Kellsue   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kellsue

You've displayed so much feeling in this poem..showing what it's like seeing yourself through someone elses eyes, and realizing that what they see isn't genuine at all...does that make sense?  Regardless, a very very good poem.  I look forward to reading more of your work!

~Kellsue




 Reflect upon your present blessings-of which every man has many-not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some. ~Charles Dickens

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give. ~Winston Churchill

Rex Allen McCoy
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since 01-30-2000
Posts 2636
Sippin a Timmy's in London


2 posted 05-09-2000 10:00 PM       View Profile for Rex Allen McCoy   Email Rex Allen McCoy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rex Allen McCoy's Home Page   View IP for Rex Allen McCoy

Another well done piece ... can't help but feel your emotions flowing in this one
Who was it that said? ... 'nice guys finish last' ... and in whos' book is it written
... in ink ...?

Rex}>{{{{o>
Butterflies_dont_cry
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since 03-06-2000
Posts 3768
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3 posted 05-09-2000 10:13 PM       View Profile for Butterflies_dont_cry   Email Butterflies_dont_cry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Butterflies_dont_cry

Michael* I loved the way this was written, but the message is very pain filled.  I've prayed many of those same prayers and agree....be very careful...there's alot to be said for the unanswered prayer. Written from your heart the only way.  Thank you for sharing this piece.

 Hold me for yesterday
Kiss me for tomorrow
But love me for today.

X Angel
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since 11-07-1999
Posts 1592
Oregon


4 posted 05-09-2000 10:20 PM       View Profile for X Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for X Angel

It's true it happened to me too!
*hugs*
Great poem
~H
Aimster
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since 02-19-2000
Posts 4367
Charlotte, NC


5 posted 05-09-2000 10:35 PM       View Profile for Aimster   Email Aimster   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aimster

Michael--

m'friend...what raw and deep emotion you've portrayed in this one. my heart truly goes out to you {{{hug}}}... i think we've all been in this situation at one time or another...though you express it more beautifully then some.

take care,
amy  

 ~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~
WhiteNite
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since 04-09-2000
Posts 249
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6 posted 05-09-2000 10:38 PM       View Profile for WhiteNite   Email WhiteNite   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhiteNite's Home Page   View IP for WhiteNite

Very Cool poem Michael.  I enjoyed this one.

 "Don't let your character get camoflaged with your environment.
Find who you are and let it stay in its true colors." --Rachel Joy Scott


LoveBug
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7 posted 05-09-2000 10:46 PM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

Micheal, this is a great poem, and so true. Sometimes we get what we prayed for, but it isn't what we thought it would be.

 "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde
Jeffrey Carter
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since 04-08-2000
Posts 2424
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8 posted 05-09-2000 11:21 PM       View Profile for Jeffrey Carter   Email Jeffrey Carter   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jeffrey Carter

Micheal,
I don't think I want to know the pain that inspired this. Very vivid description of being stabbed in the back by someone whom is supposed to love you.
Hope you feel better m'friend.

All my love,
Jeffrey

 I lie awake in a world filled with dreams,
but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep

SEA
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with you


9 posted 05-09-2000 11:32 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Michael~ Oh yes, this hurts..... you are so talented.....you find a way to make the pain you feel be felt by those that read your words. Your poems never fail to touch my heart.-SEA
WhtDove
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since 07-22-99
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10 posted 05-09-2000 11:35 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Michael *sniffles* ya tore my heart out!
This is heartwrenching.
It may not always be a bad thing to look inside, you're not so bad ya know. I know you're not! You stay in my prayers *hugs*
Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


11 posted 05-09-2000 11:54 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

But I asked God to let me
See myself through your eyes.
Hoping I could fix my faults,
Not find out all these lies.
-------------
But it's tearing me inside,
And ripping me in two.
How could I have been so blind
Not to see the real you?
-------------
Close my eyes forever,
If that's what it will take.
Please just tell me when will I
Atone for this mistake?"

"Make me so unforgiving
That my heart turns to stone,
That none would care if I lived,
Or chose to die alone."
-------------

well,you know Im having a real hard time with that verse up above...
and though I was real tempted to try to reply poetically to the emotions this one evokes in me... Im gonna spare ya...
I know nothings gonna help this hurt but time and you venting it out in your poetry...
this one stings with your anguish ...
I feel ya in every line.
feel better M, please.
jm


 It's amazing
How you make your face just like a wall
How you take your heart and turn it off
How I turn my head and you lose it all ...
And it's unnerving
How one move just puts me by myself
There you go just trusting someone else
Now I know I put us both through hell ...
I'm not sayin
That there was nothing wrong
I just didn't think you'd ever get tired of me
And I'm not sayin
We ever had the right to hold on
I just didn't wanna let you get away from me.
~MB20~Leave


Rosebud1229
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since 04-05-2000
Posts 1829
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12 posted 05-10-2000 12:32 AM       View Profile for Rosebud1229   Email Rosebud1229   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rosebud1229

Michael very nice poem, its very true how sometimes we are blinded by love , but true love is also know someone from the inside out. Not just from the outside in. When you can do this you know beyond a doubt. Sometimes we are thrown for a loop I think we have all been through this.

 
Michael
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since 08-13-99
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13 posted 05-10-2000 12:04 PM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Kellsue, Well I'm not syre if you read this as was intended but I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Rex it's not written in, just in hearts...

BDC, Indeed, much can be said for the unanswered prayer.  Even still, I do believe all things happen for a reason.

X-Angel, 'tis only too true.

Amy, ((Hugs)) to you to dear, TY

WhiteNite, I'm glad you enjoyed this one.

LoveBug, nothing at all what we were hoping for.

Jeffrey, You nailed it on the head, (betrayal of the worst kind) and I doubt anyone wants to know how this feels.

SEA, quite a compliment, every poets lives to touch the heart of the reader.   TY

Rebecca, hugs to you too...thanx for the prayers.

Janet, I somehow don't think time will even touch this one...

Rosebud1229, Alas, you make some very good points...  I don't know that I agree with them all but I shall ponder them.

Thank you all for the kind replies,


Michael

RSEvans
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since 10-23-1999
Posts 1187
Tulsa, OK, USA


14 posted 05-10-2000 12:23 PM       View Profile for RSEvans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RSEvans

You've caught me in the middle here mainly because I'm not sure what this one is about, so I will not comment in reference to that which I know and just rely on the poem to tell it.  This has a lot of raw anger and unresolved feelings in it and I can only pray that your relationship with God will help to calm those feelings.  An old preacher once told me that anger and disillusion come from pride.  Perhaps there is a lesson there, perhaps not...E-mail me if you feel the need.
Rob
Marilyn
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since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


15 posted 05-10-2000 12:34 PM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

Becareful what you wish for
For you might receive your due
Living with a heart of stone
Is really not for you

You have a warm and tender side
That must begin to grow
You have such sweet emotions
That you've not begun to know

You have so much that's wonderful
You have so much to give
Pray now for the insight
For where that love can live


Another wonderfully written piece Michael. I too have been knocked down more times then I can count and darkness does surround me. There has to be something better, something brighter, somthing wonderful out there waiting for us. What we need to do is learn how to see it clearly when it is there. We need to be able to see through the guise of ones untrue. We need to pray for the insight to find where true love lives. (maybe I am trying to convince myself with these words??)


[This message has been edited by Marilyn (edited 05-10-2000).]
Michael
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since 08-13-99
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16 posted 05-11-2000 09:45 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Robert, there's nothing disillusional when the words of she, (the love of your life), sit right before you, mocking you for your love for her, professing to have wanted someone else the "entire" time she was with you, worse than that, wanting your best friend.  I am not sure you'd really care to see an email from me at this point, Robert, but i appreciate the offer.

Marilyn, I don't know if you convinced yourself but you halfway convinced me...LOL  Thanks for the pep.


Thank you for the kind replies.


Michael

hoot_owl_rn
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since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


17 posted 05-11-2000 10:39 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Michael...I'm sorry you had to endure the pain this poem speaks so clearly of...but sometimes instead of what we pray for we are given what God feels is best for us, not always an easy thing to understand sometimes. I've come to believe that He never presents us with a challange or a crisis that He does not feel that we are able to handle and also that everything that happens to us happens for a reason. I know you have been through some very rough times in your life Michael, but keep the faith that there are better days in your future and that one day you will be able to look back on all of this and leave it exactly where it belongs..in the past.
Hugs  
Ruth
REBECCA ALLYN
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since 05-09-2000
Posts 91
Lima,Ohio


18 posted 05-11-2000 10:44 AM       View Profile for REBECCA ALLYN   Email REBECCA ALLYN   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for REBECCA ALLYN

There never was a more true statement!!!
I really like your work!!!


LOTS of LUV,
Becky
Denise
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since 08-22-99
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19 posted 05-11-2000 11:12 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

My heart goes out to you in your pain, Michael. I guess the best prayer any of us can ever pray is to see ourselves and others as He sees them. And hand in hand with that I believe, is seeing the dark and the light of any situation. We see ourselves as sinners, of course, but also as His children when we accept His forgiveness, so freely given. Without that, which one of us could stand to see the 'truth'. But you know all that already. Sometimes it's just really hard to 'see' it, especially when we are in such pain. Most of my pain comes from an unforgiving heart, which I am desperately praying to be rid of. So many big and little hurts pile up and I get lost in the maze of seeing how I was done wrong by some people in my life. I guess I am slowly coming to realize the futility of it all. There is no life in it at all, and by His grace I will be free from it.......and soon....I feel I am coming close, at last. I will keep you in my prayers for your healing from this pain and ask that you also keep me in your prayers. I think praying is the best gift any of us can give each other!

Love ya,
Denise




[This message has been edited by dsnyder (edited 05-11-2000).]
aurora
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since 05-10-2000
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20 posted 05-11-2000 11:42 AM       View Profile for aurora   Email aurora   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for aurora

Michael,
You have a beautiful way with words. This poem touched my heart in so many ways! I could feel your pain as if it was my own, Excellent work!
Sincerely,
Aurora
Rose Red
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since 02-29-2000
Posts 10
scotland


21 posted 05-11-2000 11:50 AM       View Profile for Rose Red   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rose Red

*unsheathing claws*

Might I offer up one small morsel of truth Michael my dear?
He obviously was not your best friend, and SHE is not worthy of your affections to treat you so harshly. Ending a relationship needn't be absolutely devastating, you can tell someone it's over without throwing things in their face. It is usually someone who is insecure and has a low self-esteem that degrades or hurts others for their own gain.
Time will fix this I am sure, it will prolly be a long slow process, but in the meantime be brave and strong, and never ever forget there are people in this world who will not stab you in the back. (myself included)
I am so sorry you are feeling so much pain, words can't fix your heart....
Much love and hugs and a tiny little *kiss*
{wink}
Your ever faithful admirer
Rose Red
 
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