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Passions in Poetry

Yearning at Four A.M.

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Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


0 posted 05-09-2000 06:07 PM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

Is it all right
~ ~ ~
for me to reach into your
sleeping’s dream?  Would you mind
if I touched you, gently creeping, yet unseen?
Would you stir awake in drowsy pleasure? Is this the
magic moment when the laser show begins? The lights are low;
and your desire’s the treasure that I seek. We could see the
colors through our powerful love’s lens, undulating
above us if we chanced a peek.
~ ~ ~
Will this familiar internal rhythm
merge our minds upon the ceiling above our warm,
fused entangled forms rocking on the waterbed? Is this one of those
enchanted times when our bodies and souls will melt together
in swirling circles’ spread, and the flashing kindled
passion of euphoria’s lightning land?
~ ~ ~
Yearning, I slowly,
tenderly
reach out my hand ...
~ ~ ~


© Copyright 2000 Rosemary J. Gwaltney - All Rights Reserved
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


1 posted 05-09-2000 06:11 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Rosemary, so beautiful...sigh!  (I hope you did touch his hand)
lucky
Senior Member
since 01-17-2000
Posts 1648
Idaho


2 posted 05-09-2000 06:21 PM       View Profile for lucky   Email lucky   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lucky

yea,

that's good Martie, but her aims not so good, unless I'm missing something..?



 If I could paint a portrait, of this life in which I've led, and somehow sketch a story, of the visions in my head, I'd start out with a canvas, stretched tightly in a frame, and in the bottom corner, I'd leave room to sign my name. (Michelle A. Bartley)
doreen peri
Member Rara Avis
since 05-25-99
Posts 8028
Virginia


3 posted 05-09-2000 06:27 PM       View Profile for doreen peri   Email doreen peri   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for doreen peri

Rosemary, your poetry is always so full of emotion and imagery... this is absolutely lovely!

I have always wondered about the 'form' you use... the way the lines form a shape... care to share the reasons for this? I find it easy to read and not distracting... but somewhat intriguing. Thanks!
Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


4 posted 05-09-2000 06:39 PM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

Dear Martie - I appreciate your comment.  Yes, I do touch - but usually not only his hand, unless we're in public!  (I'm grateful for your dreamy side, as well as your humor!)
~ ~ ~
Dearest lucky - you rascal - my aim is just fine!  I can tell!!!
~ ~ ~
Dear Doreen, Thank you for enjoying this.  It was fun to write.
I got hooked on shapes, by my husband lucky's wonderful artistic shapes.  Though I'll never be as good at it as he is, I still find myself addicted.
It's really nice to hear that it does not distract you.  I have often wondered about that.  It does, as well, give me great freedom to incorporate rhymes in interwoven places, without the demand to place them at the end of lines.  I never was good at that.  I couldn't keep my feelings' clarity on the page that way - it seemed that they all became forced and trite, and, losing much meaning and emotion, disappointed me.
~ ~ ~

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


5 posted 05-09-2000 07:42 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Whew...this one breaths fire   Love it  
doreen peri
Member Rara Avis
since 05-25-99
Posts 8028
Virginia


6 posted 05-09-2000 07:55 PM       View Profile for doreen peri   Email doreen peri   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for doreen peri

Thanks for explaining, Rosemary. And yes, your interior rhyming is one of the most fascinating things about your poetry and it works quite well. I used to do a lot of that myself but somehow have moved away from it. I need to try to do incorporate interior rhyme again... it's a wonderful skill you have.

About the shapes... I think it would be interesting (since you and lucky have such a knack for this) to write a poem about something and make the 'shape' of the poem somehow represent a concept about the poem. For instance, let's say you wrote a poem about music... you could make the 'shape' of the poem like a musical note... or a poem about a bird, make the shape like a bird flying...that's my challenge to you... i'd love to see/read that!!!

Again, nice work and thanks for the discussion.
lorilockheart
Member
since 05-06-2000
Posts 206
Alabama


7 posted 05-09-2000 09:00 PM       View Profile for lorilockheart   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lorilockheart

Oh, at all the questions that go through our minds, even in the most intimate, personal moments.  I love the shape, feel, and flow of your writing.
Lori

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean. Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens. Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance - I hope you dance.
song by LeeAnn Womack
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
lucky
Senior Member
since 01-17-2000
Posts 1648
Idaho


8 posted 05-09-2000 09:23 PM       View Profile for lucky   Email lucky   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lucky

Alright, I'm missing something... So what is it..!



 If I could paint a portrait, of this life in which I've led, and somehow sketch a story, of the visions in my head, I'd start out with a canvas, stretched tightly in a frame, and in the bottom corner, I'd leave room to sign my name. (Michelle A. Bartley)
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


9 posted 05-09-2000 10:39 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Rosemary, wonderful as always, and hey Lucky...I think what you think you are missing is [he he] right at your fingertips...
Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


10 posted 05-09-2000 11:13 PM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

hoot_owl - your response tickles me!  Thanks!

doreen peri - thanks again for your comments!  

lorilockheart - thank you for appreciating it!

Sunshine - I appreciate you too!

Thank you all.
Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 08-15-99
Posts 1966
Sitting in Michael's Lap


11 posted 05-10-2000 12:52 AM       View Profile for Skyfyre   Email Skyfyre   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Skyfyre

'Tis not quite four a.m., but I could feel this nonetheless ...

Sigh ...

--Kess


 Full fathom five thy father lies,
Of his bones are coral made,
Those are pearls that were his eyes;
Nothing of him that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange...


--William Shakespeare, from The Tempest

wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


12 posted 05-10-2000 01:05 AM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

i loved the poem..as to doreen's challenge i tried it a while back and yuh tiz hard i was gonna get a pic of my wife trace it and fill the lines with romanticisms about her i mite still try it but im too lazy
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


13 posted 05-10-2000 02:50 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

thanks for telling me about this poem...
I wouldnt have wanted to miss it...
very lovely and passionate...
thanx to you and the hubby for the read and reply to my ache  
yours was much more poetic than mine...
got a little overheated writing it LOL
take care, jm
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 11-06-1999
Posts 43042
Florida's Foreverly Shores


14 posted 05-10-2000 07:40 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Rosemary~
Oh, you romantic, you !
And Lucky is indeed, LUCKY !
(but he knows that)

You know the 'shapes' intrigue me
and I'd have to state that a visit to
your home page is a poetic AND an visually artistic treat !

How I also enjoy the shaping/painting of the thoughts from my heart.
I'm still trying to figure out how to make one of the ones I've done .. 'take' on this forum.  Grrrrrr !  
I'll figure it out someday.

Thank you always for your sweetness and the sharing of your talent.
Love ya'
~*Marge*~




 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


15 posted 05-10-2000 02:46 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Rosemary,
Wonderful poem one of your best.
Rosemary J. Gwaltney will be notified of replies
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