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Passions in Poetry

Where Have All The "Crazies" Gone?

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lucky
Senior Member
since 01-17-2000
Posts 1648
Idaho


50 posted 05-10-2000 10:43 PM       View Profile for lucky   Email lucky   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lucky

Hay, don't forgait me...
They just let me ont of the instatooshun
and furnished me a cute little dress
'ol Ron didn't like that mush
so he's kooking up de new constatooshun
RJ lickes me toosh jits f.I.N.E
says I can stay for a time.

 If I could paint a portrait, of this life in which I've led, and somehow sketch a story, of the visions in my head, I'd start out with a canvas, stretched tightly in a frame, and in the bottom corner, I'd leave room to sign my name. (Michelle A. Bartley)
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


51 posted 05-11-2000 09:43 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Now I'd never doubt my sweet Toerag
But there are those here who'd think he bragged
If he described the best fossil/bone ever.
So my idea (and one quiet clever!)
Is a detailed examination
Obliterating all temptation
To be modest or exaggerate.
And for that job, I'd be just great!!

Ready to report for duty, sir!
(If he says yes, I'll be just a blur
In my haste to get to that fine man!)
To be quite thorough is my plan.
What a joy such a "job" would be
Please, Mr. Toerag... hire me! *G*
Corazon
Senior Member
since 02-02-2000
Posts 1301


52 posted 05-11-2000 10:39 AM       View Profile for Corazon   Email Corazon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corazon

hey can second in line peek over your shoulder...if you get the job that is....just in case you miss a spot I could...ever so helpfully you know...put my finger on it....*g*
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


53 posted 05-11-2000 10:46 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

The 'bone collecter' is my title
I do it professionally
so if you need some help, my friend,
I'll be there personally

I've measured bones and checked them
for density and girth
even checked them for
merriment and mirth

This bone of which we speak
is the funny one is it not?
If it's that other one you know!
I'll be there in just a shot!!
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


54 posted 05-11-2000 11:06 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Such helpful souls we have 'round here!
(But at least it's not ole Balladeer
Trying to offer his assistance
For that would meet with much resistance
From Toe... and me! I fear!) *G*
Poet D claims to be expert
But I'm afraid I'd probably hurt
Her if she got 'tween me and Toe
And that Corazon must surely know
Such suggestions she should not assert!
To think that I would miss a spot!
I said I'm thorough... I will not
Make this a cursory exam!
So thank you very kindly ma'am(s)
But step aside, this job I've got! LOL
SEA
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since 01-18-2000
Posts 24152
with you


55 posted 05-11-2000 12:11 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Suthern, I'm afraid I've beat you to it
and I can tell you now I know
His name should be
Mr. BIG TOE!!

I checked it once
I checked it twice
I have to say
it was very nice!!
-SEA-
Menage Numero Trois
Junior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 33
Zee South of France


56 posted 05-11-2000 12:39 PM       View Profile for Menage Numero Trois   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Menage Numero Trois

all you ladies sure are dreamin'
ol' Mr. Toe has got you screamin'

I say let's get a microscope
tweezers and a length of rope

bonepicking Toe so you say
he's afraid to come out and play

I'd like to see how he measure's UP
but there he goes like a scolded pup

the Menage #3 came to see the fuss
and soon she found that she must

call for help from one of three
there just was no bone see

looked they might, looked they may
looked all night, looked all day

Toe sat there with streaming eyes
afraid to mention his surprise

when he woke this fine morn
his curly locks had been shorn

revealed in the stark daylight
he screamed and cried with all his might

someone stole his golden bone
and left inscribed a naughty poem

moral of the tale you see
one's more dangerous than three


 vous pouvez penser que vous me connaissez mais vous faites? Je ne suis pas qui vous vous attendez à ce que je soit



[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 05-11-2000).]
Menage Numero Trois
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since 07-20-99
Posts 33
Zee South of France


57 posted 05-11-2000 12:39 PM       View Profile for Menage Numero Trois   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Menage Numero Trois

oops

[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 05-11-2000).]
suthern
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Member Seraphic
since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


58 posted 05-11-2000 12:54 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

You see what you get with such lies?
Your message twice, to your surprise!
Toe has no use of Menage Three
For all he needs is here in me.

well... in my dreams *G*

And sweet looking SEA is so conniving
On my torment, she is thriving!
If it's the funny bone we seek
We've all had much more than a peek!

And now it seems

I cannot trust the lot of you!
You're just trying make me blue.
But by now you all should know
This here gal adores that Toe!

And so she schemes...
Menage Numero Trois
Junior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 33
Zee South of France


59 posted 05-11-2000 12:58 PM       View Profile for Menage Numero Trois   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Menage Numero Trois

*sultry french laugh*
ahh dahleeng you may theenk you can scheeme but we three are so hot you may get burnt!


ohhh and just fyi....never ever trust someone with a bad french accent *wink*


[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 05-11-2000).]
SEA
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with you


60 posted 05-11-2000 01:01 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Suthern, I'd never try
to take your Toe away
just wanted to join the fun
and have my say

Gotta love him
that bone is really quite enormous
more than enough
for the both of us!!
-SEA
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


61 posted 05-11-2000 02:09 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

ROFLMAO !!

I'll just wait, they say patience is a virtue...*g*...Ouch !!  LOL

HUSG
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


62 posted 05-11-2000 05:19 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Looking for Toerag's "bone of love"
Is like that old show "In Search Of...."
Leonard Nimoy at the head
Looking for fossils long since dead.

Crisco shortening would sponsor it
"In Search of Toerag's Little bit"
It's A Small World as its theme song
The show (and Toe) wouldn't be too long.

I'm not sure but it's my guess
They could probably find Loch Ness
Or maybe Yeti but heaven knows
They'd never find that **** of Toe's.

Of course I mean his funny bone!
The funniest bone he'll ever own!
Compared to normal....it is half
No wonder all the ladies laugh  

Kevin
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 11-02-1999
Posts 752
Torrington, Ct, Usa


63 posted 05-11-2000 07:22 PM       View Profile for Kevin   Email Kevin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kevin

It seems the hands have all been delt
but I’ve not played a card
its time I make my presence felt
this game isn’t that hard

now lets see if I understand
each and every rule
we let loose with insults bland
no matter if there cruel

well good ‘ol deer has just remarked
he’s twice the man as toe
too bad his match has only sparked
during my fireworks show

if you'll allow me my own seat
ill grant you a reprieve
and hold on to my little treat
and the ace that’s up my sleeve
Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 06-24-99
Posts 2655
Redlands,CA,USA


64 posted 05-11-2000 07:29 PM       View Profile for Andrew Scott   Email Andrew Scott   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Andrew Scott

Talk about old bones! This be one deep file.  I've been gone so long I feel like the Dead Sea Scrolls come back to life.  Things finally get back to some normalcy at the station and the first post I stick my nose into is this one!  Damn! but I missed this place.  Thanks for all the laughs on the way down. I'll be checking in more ofter now... that's a threat and a promise.  Peace ya'll!
Poet deVine
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Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


65 posted 05-11-2000 07:31 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Such a man, such a Toe
Such a treat don't you know
Tiptoes, pigeon toes, web toes too
all these toes, what's a girl to do

I see them in my dreams at night
each Toe is a magnificent site
that one there all alone
is that, could it be? Toe's funny bone!

lucky
Senior Member
since 01-17-2000
Posts 1648
Idaho


66 posted 05-11-2000 07:59 PM       View Profile for lucky   Email lucky   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lucky

Uncle Toe oops.

[This message has been edited by lucky (edited 05-11-2000).]
lucky
Senior Member
since 01-17-2000
Posts 1648
Idaho


67 posted 05-11-2000 08:08 PM       View Profile for lucky   Email lucky   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lucky

So I'm crazzzzy,,,,, I tha tha think I got it justin thyme.

Uncle Toe Said

Uncle Toe sitting by the old south gate
Wanting them boys they been staying out late
Uncle Toe thinks they are way out of line
Maybe they think he’s past his prime

Uncle Toe said, "Better straighten up right"
When Uncle Toe spoke it wasn’t a pretty sight

Uncle Toe lived in the woods out back
Lived in the shade of a utility shack
He looked in at the big brick house
At the boy’s as quiet as a mouse

Uncle Toe tucked in the compost pile
Out by the back door look at him smile
He said, "Kid stop drinking that brew
Plan while you can or the joke's on you"

Uncle Toe sitting by the swimming pool
Sits in the sun when the weather’s cool
Sits in the sun when the boy’s walk by
Maybe they think he's a little bit sly

Uncle Toe sitting by the cool mill race
All day long with a grin on his face
He said, "Boys you had better not try
Kissin'em all 'cause I won't stand by

Uncle Toe sitting by the wrought iron fence
Looks at the moon like it don't make sense
We say, "Toe here's looking at you
Hoping you'll get your wish too"

Sway to the left, sway to the right
When Uncle Toe spoke it was sure a different sight.
Menage #1
Junior Member
since 07-20-99
Posts 35


68 posted 05-11-2000 08:19 PM       View Profile for Menage #1   Edit/Delete Message     View IP for Menage #1

Zee menage vee are - Vee do not laff...
At Rag d'Toe - nor at heez staff...

He eez Zee Man.. There eez no doubt
Vee LUVVV-Vous ... Toe so pleeez don't pout..

Vee'll not confess - Justin Kace you saw
Zatt Toerag veeth Menage a Trois....     

menage a demideux
Junior Member
since 05-11-2000
Posts 37


69 posted 05-11-2000 08:49 PM       View Profile for menage a demideux   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for menage a demideux

Je suis sooooo excited to be here on zee boards!! woohoo!!! Oooo la la... iz so completement merveilleux!

Je m'apple "menage a demideux"!

Gentil de vous rencontrer!

J'aimerais voir le grand os de Toerag!
C'est très intrigant !!

Thees iz... fantastique!!

: demideux

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


70 posted 05-11-2000 08:54 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

No, Kevin, you don't understand
We don't let out with insults bland
Or with remarks both mean and cruel....
Unless they're at Toe...that's the rule.

Sir Andrew!!!! Boy, we've missed you. If there was anything to get you out of hiding, this thread would be the thing! Great to see you! Darn, this is getting to be like old times!!!!!!!!!!!!!
lucky
Senior Member
since 01-17-2000
Posts 1648
Idaho


71 posted 05-11-2000 08:55 PM       View Profile for lucky   Email lucky   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for lucky

[well, maybe just one or 2 more]

WE GOTTA GET OUT OF THIS PLACE

In this dirty old part of the city
Where the sun refused to shine
People tell me there ain't no use in tryin'

Now my girl you're so young and pretty
And one thing I know is true
You'll be dead before your time is due, I know

Watch my daddy in bed a-dyin'
Watched his hair been turnin' grey
He's been workin' and slavin' his life away
Oh yes I know it

(Yeah!) He's been workin' so hard
(Yeah!) I've been workin' too, baby
(Yeah!) Every night and day
(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!)

We gotta get out of this place
If it's the last thing we ever do
We gotta get out of this place
'cause girl, there's a better life for me and you, yes dar is, tes yhere is, yes there is...
Poet deVine
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Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


72 posted 05-12-2000 09:26 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

I sure wish he was getting an email notification everytime someone replied to this thread!!!  
Balladeer
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Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


73 posted 05-12-2000 09:43 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

GET BACK HERE, POND SCUM!!!!!
menage a demideux
Junior Member
since 05-11-2000
Posts 37


74 posted 05-12-2000 10:14 PM       View Profile for menage a demideux   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for menage a demideux


Où est l'écume?

Je suis tres ... meexed up... eez le homme meezing??? Je suis un petite demideux...

je ne comprends pas

ahhh... well... theez iz trez fantastique to have meet all theez poetique peeple...  

oh and au sujet de ce qui is le os de toerag?

merci beaucoup
 
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