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Toerag
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a

0 posted 2000-05-09 01:22 PM


Where's Balladeer and LongJohn?
Elvis Presley's dead,
Nighthawk's out a riding,
Or drinkin' beer instead.

My mind's a'goin' crazy,
(As if that's something new)
I think I need some therapy,
I may be way past due?

I remember when I was married,
My wife said I drank more than I used to,
I told her that's not possible,
For a mortal human to do!

Sure I took some drugs,
Many years ago...
But they won't hurt ya, hurt ya, hurt ya,
As I'm sure you all should know

I'm just the innocent Toerag,
Looking for some fun,
I know I'm a son of something,
And it sure ain't a simple gun!

© Copyright 2000 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
RainbowGirl
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since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023
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1 posted 2000-05-09 01:50 PM


Hiya Darling..

NH got called away, his dad..   

Haven't seen LJA for ages though, I guess Lor is keeping him busy..*g*

Good to see you about..

HUSG darling

SEA
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2 posted 2000-05-09 01:50 PM


Toe~ you are so much fun, I needed a poem from you today. I have so much crap going on today, a smile feels so out of place. Thank you for putting it back on for me!   -SEA
RainbowGirl
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3 posted 2000-05-09 01:53 PM


SEA: You ok?

HUGS

Toerag
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Ala bam a
4 posted 2000-05-09 01:55 PM


My two mistresses! It's been ages since I've been able to sleep with you two....Um, er, I mean speak with you two! How in the health are ya?....
SEA
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5 posted 2000-05-09 01:56 PM


RG~ no I'm a mess today... I have to get a leap done on my cervix, ugh! my kids are being really rotten, and my husband is being a clod, other than that, I'm really ok. -SEA
SEA
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6 posted 2000-05-09 01:58 PM


Love ya Toe!!!! -SEA
Toerag
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Ala bam a
7 posted 2000-05-09 01:59 PM


Yassee?.....Sea? Ya need me! I can leap your cervix in a matter of seconds?......I hope things go well sweets....and I'm sure your hubby will come around, and the kids.....have ya tried cuttin' him off?.....Don't feed the kids?....Ground all of them? I remember when my wife cut me off to once a month.....that wasn't really that bad...she cut some of my friends off all together?.....
RainbowGirl
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8 posted 2000-05-09 02:01 PM


Darling: I'm doing ok, how about you?..

HUSG

SEA: I'm not sure 'leap' is a good word combined with cervix when Toe's around...*g*  what the flipping heck is leap???  but good luck and tell your husband to be kind and gentle with you and the children to behave...that's sure to work...LOL

HUSG

Toerag
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Ala bam a
9 posted 2000-05-09 02:03 PM


Come to think of it....What the hell is leap?....I've heard of eat, seek, treat, meat,.....but what's leap?.....Is that like jumping over the kitty?.....I'm so confused, but, that's normal for me yanno?....
SEA
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10 posted 2000-05-09 02:05 PM


Toe~ my dear, I'd much rather you leap over it!

RG~ sweetie, it sucks.....I have to get my cervix numb, then she's gotta burn a couple spots of "bad" cells off... then I'll cramp and bleed for a few days.... they do this so it won't grow into cancer.....

RainbowGirl
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11 posted 2000-05-09 02:07 PM


Toe: I think we both just had it explained... ..

HUSG

SEA: Here we call that laser treatment and yep, it's flipping uncomfortable and a little embarrassing to say the least...I feel for you sweetheart, hope you're ok..

HUGS

Toerag
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Ala bam a
12 posted 2000-05-09 02:08 PM


Sea....I'm so very sorry I asked?....I thought it may be something about going to an OBGYN and skipping over the Pap?....I'm sorry you're having the OBGWhyme blues....and know everything will turn out well....you just take care, and pretend Toerag's doing the procedure.....that way you'll know it will turn out just great!
Craig
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Posts 444

13 posted 2000-05-09 02:09 PM


Hello Toe, I'm not sure where they are but there are rumors!

Toerag where do I begin
To tell the sorry tale
Long John while out Fishing
Was mistaken for a whale
Nighthawk in a drunken state
Joined a local hippy commune
Chanting ‘Ban the bum’ and ‘Peace man’
In a caftan of pure maroon
Old balladeer got arrested
By the Sonnet Poem Police
For passing off fake sonnets
(But he’s out on day release)

At least that’s what the rumors say
But it might not be the truth
Cause they also said that you moved south
And changed your name to Ruth


 Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool:
But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet.



RainbowGirl
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14 posted 2000-05-09 02:11 PM


Craig: Flipping heck, hello stranger..   You're on the ball tonight..*g*

HUSG

SEA
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15 posted 2000-05-09 02:13 PM


RG~ My kids will be with my Dad, my hubby is driving me cuz I get so shaky from the epinephrine, and ya, it's embarrasing, not exactly what I like opening my legs for!(LOL) I had this done 2 years ago, I'll be fine.

Toe~ thank you soooo very much for making me laugh. I needed it! I'll just remember that and laugh my way through it. At least I'll try! I gotta go get ready to go now, thanks you two for letting me talk to you, I really needed it! Love you guys,SEA

Toerag
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Ala bam a
16 posted 2000-05-09 02:14 PM


I'm not sure
But I've heard it said,
That LongJohn's had a sex change,
And changed his name to Craig?

Now this may be only rumor,
But now I ponder not,
But howdy pal, hope you're well,
I've missed ya all alot!

Sunshine
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17 posted 2000-05-09 02:14 PM


LJA's gone out to SEA
Ruth is back, hooray for we...
Balladeer has snuck in here
and Toe's he's holding hostage beer...

Just stick around, good ol' Toe,
so we know for smilies where to go
LJA and 'Deer will join in force
and the sound you'll hear
is the laughing chorus!

Toerag
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Ala bam a
18 posted 2000-05-09 02:17 PM


Yanno Sunshine? I remember in High School when I couldn't wait to quit art and intercourse....I mean, Enter Chorus....okay, so the first one was on my mind most of the time....but I can sing some?
X Angel
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19 posted 2000-05-09 02:19 PM


Uhmmm guys? I think I found the crazies...they're all posting replies to this poem...*wink*
~X~

good luck SEA!

Craig
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since 1999-06-10
Posts 444

20 posted 2000-05-09 02:23 PM



Now this is real confusing
Cause on a bet and for a thrill
I booked in to the lop chop shop
And now call myself April

So Toe’s now known as Little Ruth
John is Craig (how queer)
I’ve become Miss April
WHO THE HELL IS BALLADEER!!!!


 Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool:
But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet.



suthern
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21 posted 2000-05-09 02:24 PM


You can sing more than some! LOL. But it's hell persuading you to do so!!!
And rather than change your name to Ruth... *G* Might I suggest some alternatives involving someone by that name? LOL Leap this way! *G*
This is wonderful, sweetie... some of the crazies may be missing, but there are more! LOL.
Thanks for the smiles!!!! (Okay... grins... at the poem... and your "run for the hills" expression at Sea's explanation! LOL.

RainbowGirl
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22 posted 2000-05-09 02:27 PM


X-Angel: That's something I'll happily admit to....*g*

HUGS

SEA: Best of luck and remember to look left or right but never straight ahead and don't eat pickled onions before you go...*g*

HUGS

Darling: I'm off to look at something else for a bit so take care of you.. and don't be a stranger, listening?..

HUSG

Balladeer
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23 posted 2000-05-09 03:32 PM


Who is BALLADEER?
Are those the words I hear?
I'm here, my boys, as you can plainly see
But I'm the only one
And I can't have no fun
Cause all you suckers done ran out on me!

Toe, you took off a spell
LongJohn has gone to hell
Craig? Well, he drops by just once a month or two
Lucy girl became a relic
Poet Femme has turned angelic
So what's a Balladeer supposed to do?

It appears that Corazon
Has left us all alone
Chris doesn't like the way that we respond
Poet deVine has lost her spunk
And without your silly junk
I'm headed for the Rest Home and beyond.

So hear this BALLADEER
And get yore butt back here
There's wars to fight and battles to be won.
Craig's ready, I am sure
So let's provide the cure
To chase away the blues and have some fun!!


Craig
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24 posted 2000-05-09 04:12 PM



Bally Dear

Once a month!!! I’m a three times a night guy ask PDV  


Your idea sounds rather good
That bit about us having fun
I’m always ready for a laugh
So put me down for some


 Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool:
But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet.



poetFemmeFatale
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25 posted 2000-05-09 04:27 PM


Ohmygawd....and I thought there was something wrong with ME!     See you cats later, back to church I go!   ROFLMAO  I do believe this is the first ever thread that mentions "cervix".....(gasp)  
Justin Thyme
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since 1999-09-13
Posts 216
Oz
26 posted 2000-05-09 06:41 PM


I'm still nuts
I'm sure you know.
I'm still here
but where'd I go?

Where I am
is where I is.
But where is that?
That is the quiz.

[This message has been edited by Justin Thyme (edited 05-09-2000).]

Poet deVine
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27 posted 2000-05-09 07:37 PM


Lost my spunk did you say?
Well, I'll tell you plain and true
I've got more spunk in this vine
that in all of you

Craig is a 3time guy
nightly on ICQ
Toe is in absentia
and in dementia too

LngJhn is no longer long
he's short on time in here
I've rarely seen a spark
from our old Balladeer!

Poet deVine
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Hurricane Alley
28 posted 2000-05-09 09:54 PM


On second thought! Where have all the crazies gone? YOU, my friend Toe are the head-crazie!! Where did YOU go?
WhtDove
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since 1999-07-22
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29 posted 2000-05-09 10:20 PM


LOL  I needed this big time!!!!
Craig you're on ROLL! Love it all!
Miss ya toe!

Balladeer
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30 posted 2000-05-09 10:43 PM


How can this be? Who woulda thunk
DeVine still had a little spunk?
And Craig is a three-times-a-nighter?
Lucky DeVine! That must delight her!
And Justin Thyme stopped by to call?
Perhaps there is hope after all!!!!!!

Lorelei54
Member
since 1999-07-27
Posts 458

31 posted 2000-05-09 10:52 PM


LJA and Lorelei,
are busy living life the old fashioned way.
Work, travel, moving...and still enjoying being newly weds...Currently in Chattanooga Tennessee again, till Friday, then heading back to Maryland and our new abode...all is well with us, but LJA is busy with the books.  Good to hear we have been missed...Drop us a line!

wayoutwalt
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since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)
32 posted 2000-05-09 11:06 PM


okokokokoko yuh yuh uyh yhuhuy what really does it take to be certified bonafied tutti fruti fied around here that i ain't been mentioned yet durnit i work hard to be this knocked up on frutopia loopies so durned well gime some that reeeeeespect!!

[This message has been edited by wayoutwalt (edited 05-09-2000).]

netswan
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since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369
Washington
33 posted 2000-05-09 11:16 PM


Well hello Toe, we haven't met
but I have been really jammed

Opened this crazy poetry thread
to see if I was out of my head,

Now, because of all of you
I find myself in catch-22
should I be insane,
what an interesting game

Well have met Balladeer,
and the devine Poet --)
and fatal poet
but where is this 3 time a nighter?

All I know is there are many clever
poets in here
--so to you Toe - I shall pop open a beer

Cervix- well seems as interesting
as any and very sorry ya got to go through it
added stress is never fun - but gives
you an excuse to kick his buns

Met a few docs who say the cervix can't feel pain - now I know... they are insane

Well, feel slighlty uncomfortable
busting into this crazy place
so maybe I am sane after all
hope I don't leave in disgrace

netswan


Balladeer
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34 posted 2000-05-10 12:00 PM


Hey, Walt, my boy, oh golly gee!!
We do owe an apology.
To all of us a little odd
We DO consider you a God!!!

I have to say it is my fault
That you were not included, Walt.
Come and join us, if you please.
We'd love to have your expertise!!!!

Poet deVine
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35 posted 2000-05-10 01:10 AM


What's this you say Balladeer?
Walt's an expert tease?
I should have known you'd say that
you always aim to please

Remember when this kind of thing
was what we enjoyed the most
Rhyming war with other poets
and even Ron, our host!

We've lost our close knit cronies
somewhere in all this rhyme
so let's enjoy each other again
once more, for old sakes time!!


serenity blaze
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36 posted 2000-05-10 03:46 AM


And I thought all the crazies were staying at my house!   I can see Serenity's Bed & Breakfast will have to add a few more rubber rooms!
Nan
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37 posted 2000-05-10 07:01 AM


ALL RIGHTY THEN!!
Dustin' off my big ole' eraser here...

Off to d'eraces


suthern
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38 posted 2000-05-10 10:45 AM


Aw, Nan... put that eraser away! We haven't had this much fun in a long while! LOL

See what you started, Toe??? *G* All your fun playmates are jes waiting for you to finish being busy! *G*

ROFL @ the PDV/Balladeer/Walt show... and hoping the head-crazie gets back here soon! *G*

Kit McCallum
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39 posted 2000-05-10 11:17 AM


I feel like a voyeur!  Hope you don't mind me watching the battle ... much enjoying this!

/Kit

Marilyn
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since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
40 posted 2000-05-10 01:00 PM


Well here I come a little late,
It has become my fashion.
I'll jump right in to this bebate,
And do a little flashin.
(of my pearly white's Mikey boy  )

Toerag is a little Ruth?
And Craig is now an April?
Someone please tell the truth,
Have all the men gone (can't get a rhyme here..sigh) Female?

They're runnin round in little skirts,
They're blouses open wide.
Lookin for their just deserts,
With every flavor tried.

Look around at hairy chests,
Encased in frilly bras.
Are they really doing jests,
Or living life as Ma's?

X Angel
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Posts 1521
Oregon
41 posted 2000-05-10 01:31 PM


Oh my God, I can't believe my eyes
these poet girls are really guys?

oh my god, oh my dear
I shoulda knew it was Balladeer

I can't rhyme, don't I know it!
I'm just a lowly Free Verse poet

but rhyme I'll try so hard to do
just to play along with you

old Toe is here, back to play
even tho he's wearin' silk Lingerie

maybe I'll watch and see who's who
maybe Walt's been sniffin dippity-do

my oh my, this site is keen
with Miss DeVine as the Queen

back and forth this banter goes
as all the crazies keep us on our *TOES*

signing off for now it's true
but I'll be back to pester you


*sigh* I TRIED



Craig
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since 1999-06-10
Posts 444

42 posted 2000-05-10 02:26 PM


Shopping After The Chopping

These high heeled shoes are killing me
They give you aching knees.
My ankles weren’t designed to bend
More than forty-five degrees.
And if I get these sharp false nails
On the bloke that made this bra
He’ll get a stiletto enema.
Yes, you know who you are!!
This dress is pretty sexy though,
Straight from Paris France it is
Much better than the suit I wore
But does my bum look big in this?


 Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool:
But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet.



Dr.Moose1
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since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448
Bewilderment , USA
43 posted 2000-05-10 04:46 PM


There's just no way thatI could stay
out of all of this fuss
Seems like 'twas only yesterday
that I was one of us

But changin' to a dress and heels
don't seem quite right to me
I'd as soon wear four big wheels
and jump out of a tree

Get some speed up down a hill
and feel air resistance
Not knowing if I have the skill
to go the whole darn distance

If women's clothes are what you like
that's plain okay with me
But dresses on a Mooses butt
are not a sight to see !!!


Corazon
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44 posted 2000-05-10 05:25 PM


does just going crazy count me in? good to see you MR.TOE  
Corinne
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since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
45 posted 2000-05-10 05:34 PM


Toe,

you're the only one that could cause such a stir after such a LONG haitus.

Nice to see ya, crazy as always.

Corinne

Balladeer
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46 posted 2000-05-10 09:42 PM


Yeah, Toe can really cause a stir
'Specially if he became a "her"
And Craig is wearin women's clothes
While donning blonde wigs, I suppose.
Dr. Moose is now Moosette...
How crazy can this whole scene get????
Nan is ready to erase
If anything gets out of place.
Poet DeVine has pencil poised
Ready to rumble with "the boys"
So now that we are set to go
Where the hell is Mr. Toe??
Is he just a hit and runner?
Takes pot-shots like a tail gunner?
Round up the posse, Craig my, er, girl
And let's track down that little squirrel!

Temptress
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47 posted 2000-05-10 09:50 PM


We must be on an adventure here finding poetic fossils. Its nice to see all you people in one thread so I can say hi to all of you at the same time. Geesh..back to my work..There's poetry to be read.  

 Nothing can deter a poet, for he is actuated by pure love. Who can predict his comings and goings? "Thoreau"

Balladeer
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48 posted 2000-05-10 09:56 PM


Poetic fossil.....YES!!! That is the best description of Toerag I've seen! Nicely said. Temptress!
Poet deVine
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49 posted 2000-05-10 10:05 PM


'deer, now you've gone and done it! Now Toe's going to come in and tell his how old his bone is..how big it is..why it's the best fossil bone ever!!! Geez...
lucky
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Posts 1601
Idaho
50 posted 2000-05-10 10:43 PM


Hay, don't forgait me...
They just let me ont of the instatooshun
and furnished me a cute little dress
'ol Ron didn't like that mush
so he's kooking up de new constatooshun
RJ lickes me toosh jits f.I.N.E
says I can stay for a time.

 If I could paint a portrait, of this life in which I've led, and somehow sketch a story, of the visions in my head, I'd start out with a canvas, stretched tightly in a frame, and in the bottom corner, I'd leave room to sign my name. (Michelle A. Bartley)

suthern
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51 posted 2000-05-11 09:43 AM


Now I'd never doubt my sweet Toerag
But there are those here who'd think he bragged
If he described the best fossil/bone ever.
So my idea (and one quiet clever!)
Is a detailed examination
Obliterating all temptation
To be modest or exaggerate.
And for that job, I'd be just great!!

Ready to report for duty, sir!
(If he says yes, I'll be just a blur
In my haste to get to that fine man!)
To be quite thorough is my plan.
What a joy such a "job" would be
Please, Mr. Toerag... hire me! *G*

Corazon
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209

52 posted 2000-05-11 10:39 AM


hey can second in line peek over your shoulder...if you get the job that is....just in case you miss a spot I could...ever so helpfully you know...put my finger on it....*g*
Poet deVine
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53 posted 2000-05-11 10:46 AM


The 'bone collecter' is my title
I do it professionally
so if you need some help, my friend,
I'll be there personally

I've measured bones and checked them
for density and girth
even checked them for
merriment and mirth

This bone of which we speak
is the funny one is it not?
If it's that other one you know!
I'll be there in just a shot!!

suthern
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54 posted 2000-05-11 11:06 AM


Such helpful souls we have 'round here!
(But at least it's not ole Balladeer
Trying to offer his assistance
For that would meet with much resistance
From Toe... and me! I fear!) *G*
Poet D claims to be expert
But I'm afraid I'd probably hurt
Her if she got 'tween me and Toe
And that Corazon must surely know
Such suggestions she should not assert!
To think that I would miss a spot!
I said I'm thorough... I will not
Make this a cursory exam!
So thank you very kindly ma'am(s)
But step aside, this job I've got! LOL

SEA
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with you
55 posted 2000-05-11 12:11 PM


Suthern, I'm afraid I've beat you to it
and I can tell you now I know
His name should be
Mr. BIG TOE!!

I checked it once
I checked it twice
I have to say
it was very nice!!
-SEA-

Menage Numero Trois
Junior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 33
Zee South of France
56 posted 2000-05-11 12:39 PM


all you ladies sure are dreamin'
ol' Mr. Toe has got you screamin'

I say let's get a microscope
tweezers and a length of rope

bonepicking Toe so you say
he's afraid to come out and play

I'd like to see how he measure's UP
but there he goes like a scolded pup

the Menage #3 came to see the fuss
and soon she found that she must

call for help from one of three
there just was no bone see

looked they might, looked they may
looked all night, looked all day

Toe sat there with streaming eyes
afraid to mention his surprise

when he woke this fine morn
his curly locks had been shorn

revealed in the stark daylight
he screamed and cried with all his might

someone stole his golden bone
and left inscribed a naughty poem

moral of the tale you see
one's more dangerous than three
< !signature-->

 vous pouvez penser que vous me connaissez mais vous faites? Je ne suis pas qui vous vous attendez à ce que je soit



[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 05-11-2000).]

Menage Numero Trois
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since 1999-07-20
Posts 33
Zee South of France
57 posted 2000-05-11 12:39 PM


oops

[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 05-11-2000).]

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
58 posted 2000-05-11 12:54 PM


You see what you get with such lies?
Your message twice, to your surprise!
Toe has no use of Menage Three
For all he needs is here in me.

well... in my dreams *G*

And sweet looking SEA is so conniving
On my torment, she is thriving!
If it's the funny bone we seek
We've all had much more than a peek!

And now it seems

I cannot trust the lot of you!
You're just trying make me blue.
But by now you all should know
This here gal adores that Toe!

And so she schemes...

Menage Numero Trois
Junior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 33
Zee South of France
59 posted 2000-05-11 12:58 PM


*sultry french laugh*
ahh dahleeng you may theenk you can scheeme but we three are so hot you may get burnt!


ohhh and just fyi....never ever trust someone with a bad french accent *wink*


[This message has been edited by Menage Numero Trois (edited 05-11-2000).]

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
60 posted 2000-05-11 01:01 PM


Suthern, I'd never try
to take your Toe away
just wanted to join the fun
and have my say

Gotta love him
that bone is really quite enormous
more than enough
for the both of us!!
-SEA

RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023
United Kingdom
61 posted 2000-05-11 02:09 PM


ROFLMAO !!

I'll just wait, they say patience is a virtue...*g*...Ouch !!  LOL

HUSG

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
62 posted 2000-05-11 05:19 PM


Looking for Toerag's "bone of love"
Is like that old show "In Search Of...."
Leonard Nimoy at the head
Looking for fossils long since dead.

Crisco shortening would sponsor it
"In Search of Toerag's Little bit"
It's A Small World as its theme song
The show (and Toe) wouldn't be too long.

I'm not sure but it's my guess
They could probably find Loch Ness
Or maybe Yeti but heaven knows
They'd never find that **** of Toe's.

Of course I mean his funny bone!
The funniest bone he'll ever own!
Compared to normal....it is half
No wonder all the ladies laugh  


Kevin
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 1999-11-02
Posts 729
Torrington, Ct, Usa
63 posted 2000-05-11 07:22 PM


It seems the hands have all been delt
but I’ve not played a card
its time I make my presence felt
this game isn’t that hard

now lets see if I understand
each and every rule
we let loose with insults bland
no matter if there cruel

well good ‘ol deer has just remarked
he’s twice the man as toe
too bad his match has only sparked
during my fireworks show

if you'll allow me my own seat
ill grant you a reprieve
and hold on to my little treat
and the ace that’s up my sleeve

Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
64 posted 2000-05-11 07:29 PM


Talk about old bones! This be one deep file.  I've been gone so long I feel like the Dead Sea Scrolls come back to life.  Things finally get back to some normalcy at the station and the first post I stick my nose into is this one!  Damn! but I missed this place.  Thanks for all the laughs on the way down. I'll be checking in more ofter now... that's a threat and a promise.  Peace ya'll!
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
65 posted 2000-05-11 07:31 PM


Such a man, such a Toe
Such a treat don't you know
Tiptoes, pigeon toes, web toes too
all these toes, what's a girl to do

I see them in my dreams at night
each Toe is a magnificent site
that one there all alone
is that, could it be? Toe's funny bone!


lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
66 posted 2000-05-11 07:59 PM


Uncle Toe oops.

[This message has been edited by lucky (edited 05-11-2000).]

lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
67 posted 2000-05-11 08:08 PM


So I'm crazzzzy,,,,, I tha tha think I got it justin thyme.

Uncle Toe Said

Uncle Toe sitting by the old south gate
Wanting them boys they been staying out late
Uncle Toe thinks they are way out of line
Maybe they think he’s past his prime

Uncle Toe said, "Better straighten up right"
When Uncle Toe spoke it wasn’t a pretty sight

Uncle Toe lived in the woods out back
Lived in the shade of a utility shack
He looked in at the big brick house
At the boy’s as quiet as a mouse

Uncle Toe tucked in the compost pile
Out by the back door look at him smile
He said, "Kid stop drinking that brew
Plan while you can or the joke's on you"

Uncle Toe sitting by the swimming pool
Sits in the sun when the weather’s cool
Sits in the sun when the boy’s walk by
Maybe they think he's a little bit sly

Uncle Toe sitting by the cool mill race
All day long with a grin on his face
He said, "Boys you had better not try
Kissin'em all 'cause I won't stand by

Uncle Toe sitting by the wrought iron fence
Looks at the moon like it don't make sense
We say, "Toe here's looking at you
Hoping you'll get your wish too"

Sway to the left, sway to the right
When Uncle Toe spoke it was sure a different sight.

Menage #1
Junior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 28

68 posted 2000-05-11 08:19 PM


Zee menage vee are - Vee do not laff...
At Rag d'Toe - nor at heez staff...

He eez Zee Man.. There eez no doubt
Vee LUVVV-Vous ... Toe so pleeez don't pout..

Vee'll not confess - Justin Kace you saw
Zatt Toerag veeth Menage a Trois....     


menage a demideux
Junior Member
since 2000-05-11
Posts 32

69 posted 2000-05-11 08:49 PM


Je suis sooooo excited to be here on zee boards!! woohoo!!! Oooo la la... iz so completement merveilleux!

Je m'apple "menage a demideux"!

Gentil de vous rencontrer!

J'aimerais voir le grand os de Toerag!
C'est très intrigant !!

Thees iz... fantastique!!

: demideux


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
70 posted 2000-05-11 08:54 PM


No, Kevin, you don't understand
We don't let out with insults bland
Or with remarks both mean and cruel....
Unless they're at Toe...that's the rule.

Sir Andrew!!!! Boy, we've missed you. If there was anything to get you out of hiding, this thread would be the thing! Great to see you! Darn, this is getting to be like old times!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
71 posted 2000-05-11 08:55 PM


[well, maybe just one or 2 more]

WE GOTTA GET OUT OF THIS PLACE

In this dirty old part of the city
Where the sun refused to shine
People tell me there ain't no use in tryin'

Now my girl you're so young and pretty
And one thing I know is true
You'll be dead before your time is due, I know

Watch my daddy in bed a-dyin'
Watched his hair been turnin' grey
He's been workin' and slavin' his life away
Oh yes I know it

(Yeah!) He's been workin' so hard
(Yeah!) I've been workin' too, baby
(Yeah!) Every night and day
(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!)

We gotta get out of this place
If it's the last thing we ever do
We gotta get out of this place
'cause girl, there's a better life for me and you, yes dar is, tes yhere is, yes there is...

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
72 posted 2000-05-12 09:26 AM


I sure wish he was getting an email notification everytime someone replied to this thread!!!  
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
73 posted 2000-05-12 09:43 PM


GET BACK HERE, POND SCUM!!!!!
menage a demideux
Junior Member
since 2000-05-11
Posts 32

74 posted 2000-05-12 10:14 PM



Où est l'écume?

Je suis tres ... meexed up... eez le homme meezing??? Je suis un petite demideux...

je ne comprends pas

ahhh... well... theez iz trez fantastique to have meet all theez poetique peeple...  

oh and au sujet de ce qui is le os de toerag?

merci beaucoup

Lucie
Senior Member
since 1999-06-20
Posts 1077
Houston
75 posted 2000-05-13 01:14 AM


I've have roamed these hallowed halls for just about a year.
And you would not believe the things that I have heard in here.

There were stories about animals and veggies in a stand.
Unless you were a part of this you wouldn't understand.

Balladeer says I'm a relic. He hit the nail right on the head.
But don't worry I don't take to heart the mean things that he's said.  

I love this little family and have missed you all like crazy.
I just can't seem to rhyme the words, or maybe I got lazy.

I called out to my buddies, but I can't find my inspiration.
The words just seem all stuck in there. I've got Poetry constipation.



[This message has been edited by Lucie (edited 05-13-2000).]

netswan
Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369
Washington
76 posted 2000-05-13 03:39 AM


Sacre Menage trois!
fun to speak another language
on ze measuring ze humurous
or was it Toe's special toy

Soon it will be no pisettes and
grand titons for all the men who
have turned into ladies

prancing in their lacy panties
garter belts - black seamed nylons -
wobbling in their high heeled shoes

I will pass out mirrors
and each of you can look
so ne'er you have to fear
in public you shall ne'er appear


au revoir

netswan

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
77 posted 2000-05-26 02:41 PM


Toerag you old scalawag,
I'm down here by the sea.
Waiting for your ship to come in
Riding as low as it can be.

Come read the sweet seafaring tale,
I've written in your stead.
Then admit it is all true,
So we can confirm you are not dead.

Dakota
Member
since 2000-05-25
Posts 125
New York
78 posted 2000-05-27 03:13 AM


Just stopped in to kill some time
Got hung up in all this rhyme
Wading through the muck and grime
Your poetry banter is sublime

Keep up the good work I say to you
One thing for sure I know is true
Whomever comes in feeling blue
Will leave smiling thanks to you

Cerenity
Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637
Escondido-California
79 posted 2000-05-28 11:32 AM


To All Of You Crazies,

Come back and play please for me today!!
I've lost my smiles and need some laugh's.
The very first time I came to this forum this is what I picked for my first poem to read your peotry battles and I miss them SO!!!!

So im BUMPING this back in hopes to see more of you dear friends back at passions PLEASE!!!!!

Love,, Cerenity

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