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Open Poetry #7
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The Lines in Between
| Open Poetry #7 |
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The Lines in Between |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart 
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The Lines in Between Softly to the bed sheets it fell the letter edged with words from hell “...and the salt of you upon my tongue took me back to the sweetness of our youth...” to him she had given all to lust he had followed the call. “…but I cannot love you anymore, though know you in my heart will always stay…” Now aged and spent in fading light she glared back into the night the hating spittle on her tongue the aching pain to again be young… “…you will be all right, and you will find another, love will come back to you…” To know that in the hour past he had loved her for the last, her unknowing, but giving in trust, now to memory the act would rust. “...and the salt of you upon my tongue took me back to the sweetness of our youth...” …so he took his age and with lack of wisdom great left the woman by his side to play with new soul mate… Softly to the bed sheets it fell the letter edged with words from hell. 5 May, 2000 ©KRJ Sunshine Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow |
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| © Copyright 2000 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
This is fabulous, Sunshine, sad yet beautifully done! Gee, you're on a roll girl!!  Denise |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
rollin' rollin' rollin',,,keep those doggies moving....yahoo! Thanks, Denise! |
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Dawn Eclipse Senior Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 637The Horsehead Nebula |
That was a very vivid poem! I love description. I enjoyed this one very much. "Even a fool knows you can't touch the stars, but it doesn't stop a wise man from trying." Harry Anderson, "Night Court" *Cassandra Roseen* |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Sun, this is amazing...I got a chill reading this...it aches with longing and love lost... the letter read thru out the poem is such a perfect touch...very creative. those first and last two lines...are perfect...they are killer!! ~as always, Take Care,JM~ -------------- I know it's been a long road To get these towns behind me and I Will gladly reap what we may sow-- I am there for you ... and you're there for me ... Are you waiting for Heart in hand Woman and man See me where I stand I am Heart Heart in hand ~vertical horizon~ |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Sunshine~ You took it and ran with it ... nicely done, my dear. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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Tia Junior Member
since 2000-05-05
Posts 41massachusetts |
that was a beautiful poem.it's very deep,and it comes from inside.very sad though good job! |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Vivid as ever, Sunshine... Strange though it may sound, sadness starts glowing when you depict it in your words... Regards, sudhir. In any moment of decision, The best thing you can do is the right thing, The next-best thing is the wrong thing, And the worst thing you can do is nothing. - Theodore Roosevelt |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Thank you all...without all of you, I fear my muse would find elsewhere to play... |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Don't you be taking your muse anywhere - This is absolutely wonderful... Bittersweet, but sooooo very realistic...Nice job, my friend..  |
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ESP Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556Floating gently on a cloud.... |
Wow! Sunshine, your poem has left such a vivid picture in my mind. The hurt and rejection... Just be keeping your muse close by you, keep posting! Love and hugs, Lizzie "Poetry is the true expression of my soul, it is my ultimate means of communication. It is my rainbow of delight." |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Nan, don't think for a moment I'll leave this little nest...I've previewed others...this is the best! Thanks, Lizzie...I will keep your words close to me... |
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pandora Member
since 1999-07-26
Posts 184 |
wonderfully honest... excellent lines in here... i could identify with this one.. LOL.. well, not really funny... nice job on this, sunshine! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
It's OK to laugh, Pandora...we all have to relate on some level...thanks! |
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