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Passions in Poetry

When Is It Time? (euthanasia decision)

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Kit McCallum
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since 04-30-2000
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Ontario, Canada


0 posted 05-05-2000 06:08 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Kit McCallum

I've seen a few puppy themes which touched my heart the last few days. The following is a poem I wrote for myself last year in order to work through the difficulties faced when I had to make the unfathomable decision that it was time to put to rest, our beloved 12 year old German Shepherd Misty. The tears are never-ending ... she was my only "child".

***********************************
When Is It Time?

  When is it time to say goodbye,
     To all the love I’ve known,
  When is it time to end your pain,
     And leave me all alone?

  I’ve watched you on your good days when
     I feel your strength renewed;
  But shortly after little “ups”,
     The “down” days then ensue.

  We ride this roller-coaster of
     Emotions as we try,
  To make it through another day,
     And yet, I can’t deny …

  That as I look into your face
     On days that have been bad,
  I see a look that beckons me
     It’s tired, and hurt, and sad.

  The little spark I used to see
     Behind those loving eyes
  Is growing ever clouded
     By life’s cruel inhumane side.

  I try to see beyond the pain
    You feel with every step;
  And softly whisper to myself
    This “may” get better yet.

  If  I can bear to watch you
     Just another day or two;
  I justify my reasons to
    Ensure I cling to you.

  For letting go is harder for
     The person left behind;
  It means that if I let you go,
     I cannot turn back time.

  Back to the days I long for now,
     When you were full of life;
  And every day held promise,
     And our futures, clear and bright.

  But now the lights are darkening ...
     We take it daily now;
  I cannot see our futures clear
     Or think beyond this cloud.

  I think the hardest part in this
     Is never knowing why,
  I have to be courageous
    And I have to say goodbye.

  For if I let myself admit
     It’s time to let you go;
  I’d have to face reality
     Without you … but I know …

  That soon I have to face the
    Final outcome that I dread,
  And holding on will only serve
    To hurt you in the end.

  You’ve given such unselfish love
     For all our time in life,
  But if I hold too tightly,
    You’ll not move t’ward the light ...

  On to a better life, where you
     Can once again be free
  Of all the pain and discomfort
     That holds you here to me.

  So if I find the courage just to say
    This last farewell,
  I hope you will forgive me for
    The time it took me;  still …

  I’ll hold with me, the memories
     That in my heart remain,
  And one day, down the road a’ways
     … They’ll lesson my “own” pain.

  /Kit McCallum

[This message has been edited by Kit McCallum (edited 05-06-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Kit McCallum - All Rights Reserved
Nan
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1 posted 05-05-2000 07:14 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Such a difficult decision it is.. We've been through it twice this year in our family... We know that we hang on mostly for ourselves,  but is that so terrible?

This is a very sweet tribute to Misty - Nicely done, Kit..
Roniece Dawson-Bruce
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since 01-29-2000
Posts 5694
Sydney, Australia


2 posted 05-05-2000 07:16 AM       View Profile for Roniece Dawson-Bruce   Email Roniece Dawson-Bruce   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Roniece Dawson-Bruce

Kit - this is a wonderful piece of poetry - I can relate to this very well - we had a beautiful golden retriever, 12yrs old who we had to make a decision for but for us, he decided it was time to go and died one Monday morning - tears and much sadness followed.....the loss was hard for us as I'm sure it was for you - HUGS to you  

Roniece
Marge Tindal
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Posts 43042
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3 posted 05-05-2000 07:35 AM       View Profile for Marge Tindal   Email Marge Tindal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marge Tindal's Home Page   View IP for Marge Tindal

Kit~
This is a loving tribute for animal owners everywhere.  Our pets are a big part of our lives and bring us so much joy that the least we can do for them is be humane when the 'time' comes to make a decision on what is best for them.

I have a loving Veterinarian who says,
"When you have to ask the question - it's time."

Thank you for a tender, tender piece from your heart.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Sudhir Iyer
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since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


4 posted 05-05-2000 11:56 AM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

Really moving sentimental piece of poetry here, Kit.

Regards,
Sudhir.

May Misty's soul Rest in Peace, and be warmed  by your flowing words...

 In any moment of decision,
The best thing you can do is the right thing,
The next-best thing is the wrong thing,
And the worst thing you can do is nothing.
- Theodore Roosevelt
Sunshine
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Listening to every heart


5 posted 05-05-2000 02:59 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Kit, I will be sending you via e-mail a poem I did - it is not on this computer, it is at home, but you will see that we are soul spirits when it comes to our loves in furry form.
Jeffrey Carter
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6 posted 05-05-2000 03:09 PM       View Profile for Jeffrey Carter   Email Jeffrey Carter   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jeffrey Carter

Beautiful tribute. I can't say that I can relate, 'cause I'm not a pet kinda guy. But through your words I can feel the pain of making such an awful decision.

All my love,
Jeffrey

 I lie awake in a world filled with dreams,
but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep
LoveBug
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7 posted 05-05-2000 03:36 PM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

Pets are a big part of our lives, and letting go of them is just as hard as letting go of 2-legged loved ones. As a future veterinarian, I've seen euthanasia being admisistered, and it's hard to watch. I also know that it is neccesary. Good job on the poem.

 "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde
bboog
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since 02-29-2000
Posts 307
Valencia, California


8 posted 05-05-2000 05:55 PM       View Profile for bboog   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit bboog's Home Page   View IP for bboog

Kit~
  I liked this poem. And I too had to take my cocker spaniel to the vet so I can relate with your words. I admired the honesty of admitting that you'll have to face life without Misty. It's almost as hard as saying goodbye.
best regards,
bboog
Kit McCallum
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since 04-30-2000
Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada


9 posted 05-06-2000 07:47 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

~Nancy:  I can't imagine going through this twice in a year Nancy ... that must have been very difficult.  The anniversary of Misty's passing is only days away, and it's still so difficult ... it's been a tough week. I hung on for quite a while ... but she let me know when she'd had enough. Thanks Nancy.

~Roniece:  Letting go, be it their decision or ours brings tears and sadness of the same proportions. I sometimes wished she'd have gone on her own, but don't know if that would have been any easier. I guess I'll never know. Thank you for the sentiments Roniece.

~Marge:  Your veterinarian is a wise man. Thankfully, we had a very caring gentleman also, who made it a very peaceful experience. We stayed with Misty while he administered the aneasthetic and potion, and we held and cuddled her in our arms as she fell peacefully to sleep for the last time. That memory is the hardest.  Much appreciation for the comments Marge.

~Sudhir:  Thank you for the kind words ... I've written a trilogy of other poems that followed, and maybe I'll post them sometime. I hope she's chasing butterflies as we write.

Sunshine:  I look forward to reading your poem Sunshine ... please send it along. It's so nice to hear from fellow furry friend lovers. Thanks Sunshine, and I'll watch for your e-mail.

~Jeffrey:  Much appreciation for the lovely comment even if you're "not a pet kinda guy" Jeffrey.  When you're so attached to pets, some people do find it hard to relate to the difficulty you go through at their loss, but I found they understood a little better once I let them read some of the poetry. Thank you  for saying you understood.

~Lovebug:  When I was young, I always thought I'd be a vet, but couldn't fathom having to deal with this on a regular basis. We're so fortunate that there are people with hearts such as yours who are kind and caring when the time arises. I couldn't have made it without our wonderful vet.  Best wishes on a wonderful and fulfilling career Lovebug. We, and our pets appreciate you.

~Bboog:  I'm sorry for the loss of your spaniel Bboog ... it's such a difficult time, and goodbyes are hard at the best of times.

*To all ... thank you for your lovely comments on my second post. This one was timely as it's been a tough time this week.  I have appreciated all of your heartfelt comments.

/Kit
Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
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10 posted 05-06-2000 10:20 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

You’ve given such unselfish love
     For all our time in life,
  But if I hold too tightly,
    You’ll not move t’ward the light ...

  On to a better life, where you
     Can once again be free
  Of all the pain and discomfort
     That holds you here to me.
----------


  So if I find the courage just to say
    This last farewell,
  I hope you will forgive me for
    The time it took me;  still …

  I’ll hold with me, the memories
     That in my heart remain,
  And one day, down the road a’ways
     … They’ll lesson my “own” pain.

---------------
Kit this is EXCELLENT..so very, very, well written..your words and emotions touch me deeply this morn.
Just before they closed open 6 I posted a poem "the other man in my life"
it was my "letting go" poem for my 14 year old "tuna man" our cat.
I understand your loss...for me it was harder to watch him fade than to let go...
I know he actually made the decision for us.
we did so about 4 weeks ago...
as I sit here now typing this... a 2 month old ball of black and white fur and whiskers is asleep, purring on my lap in a sunbeam...his twin sister asleep on my compter desk in the same sunbeam.
I know Tuna man is smiling, seeing the joy on my kids faces.
thank you for sharing this with me.
it was perfect.
take care, jm
Denise
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11 posted 05-06-2000 08:14 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

This is so touching, Kit. I just went through this in February with my cat. It's a very difficult thing, indeed. You have my sympathies.

Denise
Kit McCallum
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since 04-30-2000
Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada


12 posted 05-07-2000 07:44 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

~Janet Marie: Thank you for your caring comments Janet Marie. I searched the archives for your poem, and was grateful to have found and read it. Casper was fortunate to have had such love and caring (I loved the picture too).  Your line "Like time, you are passing on quietly ... right before my eyes" really hit home as it was so true for me as well. Thank you for sharing your beautiful tribute to Casper.

~Denise:  Thank you for forwarding your poem to me Denise ... it was a lovely tribute to Doobie.  It's almost eerie how similar our thoughts were in these 2 poems.  Your third verse hit me with impact, as it says everything so clearly and beautifully in those 4 lines.  The "sadness in his eyes" rings true with me as well ... as it was something in Misty's eyes that finally told me it was time, and she'd had enough.   Thanks so much for sharing you poem with me.

*It's amazing how attached we become to these 4 legged friends. We feel the loss as surely as if they were human. Thank you both for sharing such wonderful tributes.

/Kit
Corinne
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since 10-28-1999
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state of confusion


13 posted 05-07-2000 08:35 AM       View Profile for Corinne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corinne

Thanks for sharing this, Kit.  I've got a very old feline and I hate to think of losing her, but death is part of life, is it not?

Corinne
Kit McCallum
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Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada


14 posted 05-07-2000 09:11 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

~Corinne:  You are so true ... without the knowledge that all returns to dust, what would the fun be in living life to it's fullest before it is gone? It's so important to treasure "all" loved ones daily in life while you are fortunate to have them with you.

/Kit
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