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Open Poetry #7
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Who hurts you?
| Open Poetry #7 |
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Who hurts you? |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
I wrote this in 1995...I was hurt because I was falling in Love with a woman that was not falling in Love with me...she was using me...we were using each other. James 2000 edited this. Who hurts you? It's not people who Love you that hurt you. It's people that you Love who hurt you. Sometimes they leave you... and you're left alone wondering what to do. Sometimes they bring you to tears... and cause your heart to suffer every doubt and fear. An addiction can take them from you. Is it more valuable in their mind than you? Yes...and that hurts too. I'd sure like to know how alcohol...drugs...or sex here and there can be more important than a friendship...a relationship...and a love affair. How can I be a lover to someone who's true lover is alcohol and drugs and sexual pleasure. Why must I fall in Love with someone who's life seems devoted to hurting me beyond all measure. Jameslee@January1995 |
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| © Copyright 2000 JamesMichael - All Rights Reserved | |||
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daft Junior Member
since 2000-05-02
Posts 16 |
It's a sad thing. I thought about this one & nothing seems to have changed. There are still many people which are the way that you explained. |
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Marina Member Elite
since 2000-02-10
Posts 2245Pickering, Ontario |
Everyone I think James, has been fooled into this sitaution at one time or other. It is sad to offer someone so much when they had never the intention to offer it back. The worst part is when we think you can help them change. Marina |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I think we are only hurt by those that we love the most....this is a very good description of your pain. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you daft, Marina, and Poet Devine for reading and your wonderful comments. Yes the worst part is that we think we can help them change...and they only want someone to rescue them over and over again...but something in side of us compels us to participate...almost like I need that experience as much as they do..Only the ones who are in love would stick around to be abused...foolishly I might add...all the others would have said goodbye long ago. James |
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LoveBug
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-01-08
Posts 4697 |
It always hurts when you love someone, and they love something that hurts you. I hope writing this helped you. "We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -Oscar Wilde |
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netswan Senior Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 1369Washington |
This is a lovely poem and so sad. Yes, people who you love do hurt you. Drugs, alcohol, loose sex morals and so many things -- even cut downs, put downs, and things that hurt you to the core. But, the bright side is -- once you realize that when a person has an addiction -- it is not that they don't still love you, they are so involved in their own problems and their addictions and no one can help them stop except themselves. So, the real bright side is that you can learn about yourself and find out why you get attracted to those that are "helplessly devoted to their addictions" Being a co-dependent does not have to be. choosing these types to love does not have to be --- In families, when you have them ---we love with "tough love" and if they can't accept that and get help -- we have to let them go, for our own self preservation -- and we learn to find healthy individuals to give our hearts to so that our love is returned ---- This poem is from the heart that bleeds. And, from now on, needs no longer to bleed over --- trying to make an addicted person love you -----IT can't be -- until they get help they love only what they NEED. So never take it personally! Hugs from netswan |
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Lone Wolf Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842Lansing, MI USA |
James, This is very touching. So sad to be hurt by those we love the most. Of course, watching them hurt themselves is just as bad. Glad this was not recent. Great writing!  Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end. --Michael W. Smith |
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
James, I am moved... Nice but sad flow of thoughts... Regards, Sudhir In any moment of decision, The best thing you can do is the right thing, The next-best thing is the wrong thing, And the worst thing you can do is nothing. - Theodore Roosevelt |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Love Bug, Netswan, Lone Wolf, and Sudhir for your very nice remarks. Writing about the pain I have experienced in my life helps me to understand my part in the situation..I believe that knowledge, wisdom, and understanding can improve my position in life. It seems that I am attracted to women that don't quite have their acts together..and usually it is a sexual attraction. I am trying to step back and let things happen in my relationship instead of trying to control them and manipulate them...I am having some success...I feel more comfortable stepping back. I agree about watching them hurt themselves is hard to bear..I used to feel liked I should rescue them...but I am changing..I don't want to rescue them. Thanks to you all for understanding. James |
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monique Member
since 2000-02-03
Posts 369Louisiana |
You describe very well a situation I am in right now and it is so hard to let go monique |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
I know what you mean Monique...it has taken me a year to let go...and I still am letting go...I found there were stages..in the beginning it was almost impossible..emotionally and mentally..later it was something I knew that I must do...I went thru an anger stage...and now the final act has begun....all in all a process that is very stressful and yet a growning experience. James |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
It is so hard to watch those in such situations too James. Although not a victim myself, I watched helplessly as my sister was drawn over and over to the same type. I wrote many a poem for her ... hoping she'd someday see that she was worthy of better. "Be true to yourself, and demand the best for yourself … For only through lessons learned, can we create our own happiness" I'm grateful that she's now found a wonderful man and broken the spell. Thank you for a lovely and thought provoking poem. /Kit |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
--James As always you write with such direct honesty and with a lovely style. this piece here spoke volumes..though written five years ago, its meaning and message are none-the-less quite POWERFUL still. I am sorry that you had to endure this kind of hurt and pain...but I think we all do at one time or another in our lives. Its very hard to fall in love with someone who doesn't love you and isn't willing to give you their heart. Especially when you have already given them yours. And it sounds like the person you speak of in this piece...was on a course for self-destruction. I think it is best that you didn't get wrapped up in their life...just my opinion. At any rate...i wish you a new love who will love you as equally much as you love them. Take care and best of luck to you! Amy ~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~ |
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Tuck Junior Member
since 2000-04-29
Posts 27 |
what a beautiful poem....on such a sad subject....i agree with who said that who we love the most hurts us the most...hope things have worked themselves out...they always seem to... |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Kit, Amy, and Tuck for taking the time to read and comment on my writiing. Kit that is a wonderful message about your sister. It takes strength and courage to let go and do whats right. Thanks Amy for your concern and thoughts. I am learning about mutual attractions right now...I am backing away from women that make me do all the work...if they are interested in me they need to let me know. James |
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PericolosoAmore Junior Member
since 2000-04-14
Posts 31 |
I hear you on this one. I know what it's like to be i your position. great poem. P.A. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Thank you Amore I appreciate your response. James |
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