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Passions in Poetry

Throwing Rocks

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Effigy
Member
since 04-11-2000
Posts 490
Just sitting at the computer


0 posted 05-03-2000 02:31 PM       View Profile for Effigy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Effigy

The sun set,
  casting an orange red glow
  over the land,
the day rocks fell from the sky.

People below me taunt
and spit on me.
It's not their fault.

A trail of blood runs across
my mouth on its way down
from my head. Thorns.

Glass and bone are thrown,
from crowds hurling insults.
They know no better.

My muscles aching,
   streching and ripping.
Splinters dig deep into the
broken skin on my back.

Some where off to my side
people are bidding for my clothes.
Who will wear them home?
May they cover up their ignorance.

Pain in my rists is unbelievable.
The sound of cracking bones,
echoes in my ears.

More skin tares and rips,
blood soakes the ground.
The people cheer.
DEATH!
Father why?

Then with one last look
through these eyes, I
no longer feel the rocks.

Father I'm coming home!




 There is something inside me
and I know it's good,
but understanding is misunderstood.
  




[This message has been edited by Effigy (edited 05-03-2000).]
© Copyright 2000 Effigy - All Rights Reserved
sKiTtLeS
Member
since 04-12-2000
Posts 116
wisconsin, u.s.a.


1 posted 05-03-2000 05:10 PM       View Profile for sKiTtLeS   Email sKiTtLeS   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for sKiTtLeS

Very interesting post, Effigy.
I wasn't really expecting to see something like this.  Nice use of detail, very graphic.


 sKiTtLeS~
A.C.Turner
Member
since 04-30-2000
Posts 89
Reading, Pa.Home of Bardfest


2 posted 05-03-2000 05:32 PM       View Profile for A.C.Turner   Email A.C.Turner   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for A.C.Turner

Interesting. Surreal yet vivid imagery. Must read this again as I'm sure there's a hidden message in there. Peace. ACT.
TerryW
Senior Member
since 03-23-2000
Posts 787
Louisville, Mississippi, USA


3 posted 05-03-2000 05:37 PM       View Profile for TerryW   Email TerryW   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit TerryW's Home Page   View IP for TerryW

Effigy,
     Wonderfully done!   Very vivid imagery, and powerful words for a very powerful emotion.  You captured this one exquisitely!

 ~you reached inside, you touched my heart,
and I am all the better for it~
Terry A. Woodson, Jr.
Effigy
Member
since 04-11-2000
Posts 490
Just sitting at the computer


4 posted 05-03-2000 06:14 PM       View Profile for Effigy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Effigy

thanks, I'm glad that you all enjoyed it.

 There is something inside me
and I know it's good,
but understanding is misunderstood.



Jeffrey Carter
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Member Elite
since 04-08-2000
Posts 2424
State of constant confusion!


5 posted 05-03-2000 06:35 PM       View Profile for Jeffrey Carter   Email Jeffrey Carter   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Jeffrey Carter

Hi,
You know the best thing about the story of the crucixion?

They didn't have to nail him to that cross, He would have hung there willingly without any restraints.

Great imagery in this piece...btw

All my love,
Jeffrey

 I lie awake in a world filled with dreams,
but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


6 posted 05-03-2000 08:04 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

I really enjoyed this...it had a 'modern' feel to it....  
forne_marin
Member
since 04-13-2004
Posts 140
Spartanburg, South Carolina


7 posted 04-16-2004 12:03 AM       View Profile for forne_marin   Email forne_marin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit forne_marin's Home Page   View IP for forne_marin

Considering the now famous (infamous?) "The Passion of the Christ", this poem is very topical. You leave the reader asking, "Is this Jesus I'm hearing, or is the persona merely feeling martyred?" I'm not much for religious poetry, but it's a powerful piece regardless. Technically, I only have one comment: You need do decide what your capitalization rule is for your poem. There doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to which lines are and are not capitalized. My preference is to go with how you set up the beginning of the poem. If the line in the poem starts at the margin, it's capitalized. If it does not need to be capitalized, or if it IS not capitalized, you should indent it just a beat or two, like you have done at the beginning. Just my $.03
 
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