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Open Poetry #7
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Balladeer
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since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

0 posted 2000-04-30 10:29 PM




(I wrote this parody as tribute to my last hospital stay...dedicated to Alicat because we share the same warped sense of humor)

To the tune of THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES........

Thanks.....for the enemas
The way you placed the hose
Toward only Heaven knows
I never knew
When you were through
A good thing, I suppose

I thank you.....so much.

Thanks for the -oscopathies
The colon- and sigmoid-
The way you filled my void
The way your hands
Caressed my glands
Including my thyroid

I thank you.....so much.

I just came by for a checkup.
I only had pains from the neck up.
I didn't know
You would torture me so...
Should have called Jack
To carry me back...

And

Thanks for the x-rays, too
And all those MRI's
Along with two GI's.
I drank that chalk
And couldn't talk
Without tears in my eyes...

I thank you.....so much.


© Copyright 2000 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved
Poet deVine
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since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
1 posted 2000-04-30 10:31 PM


OMG!!!! LOL this is so good!!! thanks for the laughter!  
Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
2 posted 2000-04-30 10:31 PM


Well, they do say that laughter is the best medicine...and all I can say to this poem is:

ROFL!!!

DiObear
Member
since 2000-04-30
Posts 66
Switzerland
3 posted 2000-04-30 10:33 PM


This poem is great!  Thanks so much for the laugh.

 

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2000-04-30 10:34 PM


It only hurts when I laugh....stop...oh.please stop

I hope you are okay!

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
5 posted 2000-04-30 10:36 PM


LMBO!!! OH my did I need this laugh!!
This is one treat you hope to never get again.  

Alwye
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since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
6 posted 2000-04-30 10:38 PM


LOL!!!!!! What a riot!  Thanks for the laughs, balladeer!

 *Krista Knutson*

"Lonliness is the human condition."
*Mark Twain, in the book "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn"*

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2000-04-30 10:39 PM


Balladeer,
Thanks for the LOL
You did it all so well
And thanks for the hinder,
That rectal reminder.
For I've been though it all
As I seem to recal.
Very good, enjoyed.
Sy

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
8 posted 2000-04-30 10:40 PM


tears are running down my face... LOL... i can't stop laughing... i wish i could add a recording here... can't type... lol.....

i love it!!!

desperado
Member
since 1999-05-24
Posts 312
FT Hood,Tx
9 posted 2000-04-30 11:00 PM


lol  you are a nut and a half.  lol  I loved this.  hope I won't have to write anything like this.  I'll leave this for you.  lol
Jeffrey Carter
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Member Elite
since 2000-04-08
Posts 2367
State of constant confusion!
10 posted 2000-04-30 11:03 PM


Balladeer,
Good to see you didn't lose your sense of humor during that hospital stay.

All my love,
Jeffrey

 I lie awake in a world filled with dreams,
but dreams can be so real when you don't know you're asleep

lucky
Senior Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 1601
Idaho
11 posted 2000-04-30 11:21 PM


Well 'ol Balladeer,

The Bible does mention something about bestowing honor on our more comely parts but I was never to clear as to what that meant and you have certianly brought new light to such subjects.


 

Balladeer
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since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
12 posted 2000-04-30 11:22 PM


LOL! It warms my heart to see that warpness is alive and well. I thank you all for enjoying it.
Cinderella
Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 152
Arizona
13 posted 2000-05-01 01:54 AM


Sorry couldn't finish singing your poem to the tune of "Thanks For The Memories" as my eyes filled with tears.  Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee-Hee .........BRB
Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

14 posted 2000-05-01 11:12 AM


Oh, you poor 'deer'!! ROFL  

Denise

wayoutwalt
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since 1999-06-22
Posts 4870
TEXAS (it's all big)
15 posted 2000-05-01 11:13 AM


hehehe yuh warped i like!!
Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
16 posted 2000-05-01 11:25 AM


Ron....oh RON....I think, methinks, it is time for Passions to start its own soundbites...tunes like this just need to be heard!

And by the way, 'Deer...great job!

suthern
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since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
17 posted 2000-05-01 02:33 PM


ROFLMAO... Thanks, Deer one... the mental pictures presented in this poem gave me the biggest smile I've worn around this hellhole I call an office in over 2 weeks!

Okay, I can't resist. *G* Re: desperado's response (by the way, welcome back, des!) and the physical anomaly he mentions... we always suspected you were short-changed! *EG*

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